With Tom Cruise whisking Suri Cruise off to Disney World so he can secretly set her to ‘Matricide’ inside Space Mountain and his team of bodyguards no longer surrounding Katie Holmes so she doesn’t speak, think or come in contact with Thetan-contaminated surfaces, here she is yesterday with a shitload of free time on our hands, and no idea what to do with it. She probably walked up to random strangers begging them for instructions.
KATIE: Excuse me. Would you mind telling me what to do?
STRANGER: Get lost, lady.
KATIE: Ooh, a command! Thanks. — Say, do you wanna be my boyfriend?
STRANGER: I’m homeless. Will you let me live in your house?
KATIE: Only if you tell me to.
STRANGER: Wait, aren’t you the broad who drives that guy around who has sex with guys like me then dumps the bodies in the river?
KATIE: I was hoping you wouldn’t remember that. *shoots him with a ray gun* I mean, wait! Stupid reflexes.
Photos: Pacific Coast News
She should do Anal. Yes Anal. That always spices up your life!
The most human, regular, just-hangin’-around type of girl she’s looked in years.
I say give her another six months to a year, and she’ll be attractive, vibrant, and acting in some good pics.
She always was a vivacious person, always smiling naturally … Tom Cruise and Scientology sucked the life out of her. She got out just in time. She can be herself now. God, how I hate that smarmy, phoney, weasel-faced, lift-wearing midget. Add liar to that … according to the unauthorized biography, he is a very accomplished liar.
maybe she could stop in vic secrets and pick up a BRA ???
I was thinking boob-job.
But then again, that’s my answer to most of life’s problems.
Hand on chin, far away glance, slowly nodding in agreement!
Suri really sucked the perkiness right outta her, didn’t she?
married or single, you make MOVIES, Katie. Stop dressing like a dumpster-diving hobo!
“a shitload of free time…and no idea what to do with it.”
May I suggest finding a nice tall atheist straight guy?
Seth Macfarlane? Oh wait…..
You just described me.
Hot
She could write a totally fictitious book about being married to gay man caught up in a huge cult. Total fiction though. Totally fiction, right $cientology and your pesky lawyers and NDAs, total fiction.
It couldn’t help but be better than anything ever written by L. Ron Hubbard. Anybody who ever referred to him as an author was being extraordinarily generous.
You’re being kind – I always considered that describing him as a human being was stretching the point.
She should update her contact prescription since she no longer has to look at gay, midget cock.
“You stowe my cowor!”
Now, where did I leave my dignity? Hmmm… Weird.
I would tap that ass.
Sort of like someone walking out the gates of a prison after serving a long stretch. ‘Whoooaaaa, I am free…’
What is wrong with her? Why is she always dressed like it’s fall in New York? When it’s one of the hottest summers on record.
“Is . . is that a space alien over there? You mean Scientology was right? Ah, shit!”
It’s too bad the only way she can even up her eyes is to tug on her scalp.
She’s always wearing the fugliest jeans.
She is going to be loads of fun for someone or a bunch of someones in the near future.
man, i love these little dialogs at the end of articles …
Looks like her boobs don’t know what to do either. One’s most definitely heading downwards and the other’s checking out breaking right.
Still dressing mannish with a sour expression on her face. I’d have thought she’d have a massive perma-grin on her face by now.
She should pick up tin cans in Central Park with her beaver.
Articles said she fired all of Tom’s people and got her own bodyguards. Did they all go with Suri so that the Scientologists can hurt Katie now?
After standing next to Tom Cruise for so long, Katie still makes everyone around her look like a midget by comparison.
This is how you look when you realize you put your pants on backwards.
She could write a totally fictitious book about being married to gay man caught up in a huge cult. Total fiction though. http://bit.ly/Nv74g9
How would you look if the child you’re trying to protect from weird daddy’s “auditing & do/have whatever my millions can buy-I’ll carry you forever and never say no to you” had YOUR CHILD alone @ Disneyland for the 1st time since you blindsided him? Give the woman a break!
Scott Caan’s inner monologue: “They’re pap’ing me?! Woah?! Stay cool Scotty.. look off to the left.. keep it natural”
mmm mmm mmm about saffron.. mmm mmm something something.. they call them hollow yellow.. quite rightly..