Kate Major: ‘Jon Gosselin wooed me with his ATV. Then I banged him.’

Clocking in at minute 14:59:55, Kate Major tells Life & Style she was in a sexual relationship with Jon Gosselin who she claims acted like “a dirtbag” and was shady as hell:

On their first night together:
“Jon never wanted to use his credit card — he was worried that he’d get caught or spotted. On July 20, we went to a hotel in New Jersey. I paid for the room, and he snuck up a back way. That was the first time we slept together. He said he was falling in love with me. He said, ‘I thought Hailey was perfect until I met you.'”

On having sex in his house while the kids were asleep:
“Jon said he couldn’t be seen having a girlfriend, so he told me to drive to a neighbor’s house after midnight, when the kids were asleep. He said he’d pick me up on his four-wheeler, take me to his house and drop me off again at 6 a.m. I was shocked and said, ‘No, I don’t feel right doing that. What if the kids wake up?’ He was like, ‘They’re not going to notice, they’re not going to see anything.’ He wasn’t nervous about it –I was. Looking back, it was all pretty much sexual. That’s what he had in mind.”

On getting kicked to the curb – via text:
“Jon told me he needed to go to Massachusetts to meet Hailey and break up with her. Right when he left on July 23, he shut his phone off — and also shut himself off. Once he finally called me, I didn’t know the new person. He sounded upset and said he needed to be single right now. Then he sent me a message saying, ‘Do not contact me again.'”

Despite the fact Kate Major blatantly tried to glom onto gold nuggets from someone else’s uterus, I really want to believe Jon Gosselin picked up a piece of strange on his ATV under the cover of darkness. So I’m going to. Ha! What an A-hole.