Madonna terrifies Kate Hudson
“Kate was completely intimidated by Madonna,” said one guest. “She clearly didn’t want trouble and decided to keep a low profile for the rest of the match.”
Said a second guest, “I didn’t even see Kate Hudson again after Madonna arrived. She ran away! But if I were dating Madonna’s ex, I’d be scared, too!”
While Hudson hung out in the back of the tent, Madonna rocked her royal status. After showing up in a black Mercedes-Benz with several NYPD escorts, she held court with boy toy Jesus Luz, her kids Rocco Ritchie and David Banda, as well as pals Marc Jacobs, Lorenzo Martone and photographer Steven Klein.
“Madonna literally didn’t care,” said a third eyewitness.
“She showed up with no makeup, a dowdy [denim] outfit and her hair pulled up in a ponytail. She doesn’t need to compete with Kate, because she will always be Queen Bee.”
Of course, it’s completely understandable to be terrified of Madonna. I mean, Christ, one look at her death hands, and I not only shit my pants, but the pants of everyone in our office. Which wasn’t easy. First, I had to get a gun, then wait forever for people to drop trou, then convince everyone I have an evil twin. Freaking annoying.