Kate Beckinsale is the Sexiest Woman Alive

October 2nd, 2009 // 104 Comments

Kate Beckinsale has been named this year’s The Sexiest Woman Alive by Esquire’s which is a random, but not unwarranted selection. After close inspection, I’ll allow it, but Kate’s going to owe me one. I’m really putting my neck out here saying stuff anonymously on the Internet, so the least she could do is sit naked on my coffee table while I’m having people over. I’d do the same if the roles were reversed. — Or for free. (Kate, call me.)

Photos: Esquire
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  1. me09

    the cover picture isnt all that great ….she looks good in the other ones but i have seen better lookin people on the streets but she is pretty

  2. me09

    the cover picture isnt all that great ….she looks good in the other ones but i have seen better lookin people on the streets but she is pretty

  3. Annie Loves Anal

    Hey 19. There is nothing wrong with being gay. I know you Queens are into the age thing more than the quality thing. The fact of the matter is, most hetero men (what am I saying, ALL hetero men) would pay good cash money to get with that. Same goes for Jennifer Tilly, she’s 51 and EXTREMELY bangable.

  4. ******KrazyHotKelli**********

    Oh, and 48? Exactly where do you live? Hot chick Island?

  5. Drew

    I’ve been saying that kate beckinsale is the sexiest woman alive for years now. i would do unthinkable, unforgivable things to be with this chick.

  6. dk34997

    Def, the hottest fucking woman ever, its about time Fish you dug up a article on a real bitch and posted her, TY!

    @6 Your wifes a whore… Ask the Lacrosse team.

  7. Mickey0123

    Esquire will get no argument out of me on this selection!

  8. 3===========================D

  9. ROUGHism

    Becks to sail into uranus, how the hell did I typo this little gem?

  10. Erection of the Temple

    She’s a goddess but then again what do I know I am a heterosexual man.

  11. tony

    i dont understand the hype around this chick, she is butt ugly, has a weired mouth and buck teeth, and is too skinny. nothing sexy about her.

  12. Jibbly Biggins

    13. J-Money

    You’re an idiot. 80% of looks are genetic. Most people won’t look as good as her even if they live on diets of tofu and scale treadmills like a gerbil. There are three body types due to genetics – the endomorph (fat and soft – Kelly Osbourne), ectomorph (thin and lean – Kate Beckinsale), and mesomorph (low fat, high muscle – Pink) .

    Most models and actresses are ectomorphs. They also have tall figures with long bone structure and more symmetry to their face shapes than most people.

    Stop making it sound like every woman who doesn’t hot like Kate Beckinsale is a compulsive food shoveler. Chauvinist pig.

  13. I like her, and she’s pretty, but this doesn’t really make any sense since she hasn’t been in anything major for a while.. Whiteout doesn’t count, no one’s going to see that so I’m confused. I guess we should all be happy it’s at least not Megan Fox.

  14. manly

    She has a mannish face and no ass. Pretty sexless if you ask me.
    even with photoshop she looks dreadful.

  15. Test

    “61. tony – October 3, 2009 6:10 PM

    i dont understand the hype around this chick, she is butt ugly, has a weired mouth and buck teeth, and is too skinny. nothing sexy about her.”

    You’re a fucking idiot. Stop making fucking bullshit posts just so you can stand out and try and look cool by going against the grain. Shut the fuck up. And if you really are that moronic that you genuinely feel that way, you need to get your motherfuckin eyes checked

  16. Totally

    I’ve thought she’s the hottest woman eva since Underworld. I have SUCH a girl crush on her. She’s my #1.

  17. browny

    Um, she bought the boobs. Real ones don’t sit up like that. Sorry to disappoint. Aside from that… attractive and well photoshopped.

  18. aja

    hey number 12 – CHECK THIS OUT – she has severe stretch marks

    http://www.awfulplasticsurgery.com/2004/03/30/the-ugliest-breasts-in-hollywood/

  19. anon

    @47: Very true. I was astounded when I found out it was her in the movie Cold Comfort Farm. She’s definitely had work done.

  20. Urbanspaceman

    The breast implants are something of a negative. And yes, she has them.

  21. Too bad her acting talent is not equal to her beauty!!!

  22. eh

    plain, short.

  23. me09

    photo shop makes anything look better…….shes not all that

  24. me09

    photo shop makes anything look better…….shes not all that

  25. Lugh

    @ #74 me09:

    I’m sure photoshop wouldn’t be able to make you look better. It has its limits you know.

    Kate is gorgeous, no doubt about it.

  26. me09

    theres no way in hell i would even want to subject myself to being on this site for all the horny, lonely perverts.( like yourself) that can only get off on a website …poor little you !! no thanks

  27. me09

    theres no way in hell i would even want to subject myself to being on this site for all the horny, lonely perverts.( like yourself) that can only get off on a website …poor little you !! no thanks

  28. ME09

    #75…..CALM DOWN KATE …WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE JUST A ATTENTION GRABBING SKANK THAT WILL BE ALL USED UP IN ANOTHER 2 YEARS SO GET IT WHILE YA CAN !!!!! SHE POSTED THESE FOR ALL THE LONELY JERK OFFS OF THE WORLD ..ESPECIALLY YOU # 75 !!!! GO WACK IT

  29. ME09

    #75…..CALM DOWN KATE …WE ALL KNOW YOU ARE JUST A ATTENTION GRABBING SKANK THAT WILL BE ALL USED UP IN ANOTHER 2 YEARS SO GET IT WHILE YA CAN !!!!! SHE POSTED THESE FOR ALL THE LONELY JERK OFFS OF THE WORLD ..ESPECIALLY YOU # 75 !!!! GO WACK IT

  30. male, 30 lbs. overweight, unshaven

    She could do some squats..

  31. neptune

    If she’s really had breast implants, why is one of her breasts obviously larger than the other in the white tanktop picture? I say – way to keep it natural!

    Also, to the idiots who think all women should look like this – you do realize that if every woman looked like this, there would be no reason to call her the “sexiest,” right? There would be nothing special about looking like that if it came naturally to any woman! And I’m NOT talking about (or supporting) being overweight, I’m talking about body shapes/types. Just because a woman is healthy doesn’t automatically make perfect, sexy curves appear. If it did, we’d all look like models, which would completely remove the significance of *being* a model. Why is it so hard to compliment one woman without comparing her to the rest?

    If I said – hypothetically – that all men should “take care of themselves” enough to look like Brad Pitt, would you all measure up? That should be a plausible request since all men obviously have that potential – just step it up at the gym a little, right? Give me a break!

  32. Tony

    test – October 3, 2009 11:44 PM

    “61. tony – October 3, 2009 6:10 PM

    She’s an ugly dog faced whore, just like your mom. Sorry I don’t like women that look like men.

  33. ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww

    Cheryl Cole is hotter than this skank. Cheryl has a pretty face, Kate Beckinsale looks like a horse.

  34. jubjub

    She is smokin’ hot; she looks much better since she had the implants removed; those implants looked like crap on her; getting rid of them was a good move.

  35. tromba

    Definitely not “the” sexiest – but a good top 20 candidate. What makes her sexy to me (other than her girl-next-door face and curvy feminine body) is that she seems to have none of those disgusting, filthy tattoos. When will those goddamn awful things become passe?

  36. she’s hot but she’s had so much plastic surgery.. im not gona hate a pretty girl for getting something done to make her look perfect…. but she was UGLY before. she’s completely fake…. disgusting…..

  37. eehhhh.

    eehhh. she is so-so. pretty, sorta hot. but certainly nothing to write home about. def not #1 sexiest. if i can’t even settle on one person for my own #1, why should i buy this ‘universal’ choice?

    lets put it this way – if she approached me, i wouldn’t turn her down and would feel pretty good about it. but i wouldn’t ever notice her walking down the street – and i am ALWAYS looking to see who is hot.

    i do, however, like the fact that she has a handful of class and maturity.

  38. Surprise win, but it’s Esquire, so who cares

  39. Pilatunes

    I just discovered what ‘priapism’ means. Now what do I do? Oh, I know.

  40. Bob

    I’ve always considered to be one of the hottest women on the planet. Her face is perfect – perfect, and her body’s pretty good too.
    As for anyone who says she’s not hot or they couldn’t care less is full of crap. Every straight guy on this page would jump at the chance to nail her – no matter how much they might deny it. Anyone saying she isn’t hot is either a repressed homosexual (not an insult, just a hint that you might want to take a good look at yourself), or lying because they’re pissed that they’ll never have the chance to nail anyone even a tenth as hot.

  41. Finally – a post of a real woman. Thanks for the break, Fish. Now back to Kate Gosselin, Lindsay Lohan and your usual level.

  42. Finally – a post of a real woman. Thanks for the break, Fish. Now back to Kate Gosselin, Lindsay Lohan and your usual level.

  43. Rhialto

    Great looking girl.Does she like to cook??! I like fresh food indeed.

  44. @91, not every got would jump at the chance. she’s very pretty but i’m not big on the really skinny, no butt look. i give her credit and i’m happy she’s the sexiest woman alive (according to esquire), but other than that she’s got the average body.

  45. name it for christ sake

    i can bet that her pussy is cold as ice like her personality.

  46. Sam

    Nah, she was better when she wasn’t so damn skinny. She used to have gorgeous meaty legs and thighs

  47. damiones

    some of you kate haters are nuts. sure you are entitled to your opinions but calling her names like skank and whore? really? and making statements like she has no body or a man’s face no ass etc? huh? are you looking at the right pictures? she has a great curvy, but athletic body. she is not supermodel thin. she’s healthy, yet some of you seem to think that she should be built like queen latifah or something and that she should have a huge, mishapen kardashass. haha. why can’t a women be good looking and confident without some folks tearing her apart?

  48. D

    Ew! When I clicked this link I thought it was going to be someone who is actually pretty. What has our culture come to that we think THIS is the sexiest woman ALIVE? There are millions of other women all over the world, and definitely in America, who are undoubtedly sexier than her. She’s not inherently ugly but she’s not that sexy either.

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