Kate Beckinsale has fat ass days

January 17th, 2006 // 42 Comments

beckinsale-fat-ass.jpgKate Beckinsale says that there are days she feels so fat that she refuses to leave the house.

“It feels like I have somehow managed to cover up the mis-shapen strange child for an evening and fooled everybody. But I have days when I feel great and then I have days when my ass won’t fit in my jeans and I won’t leave the house. I guess when you become an actress you hope those fat ass days will go away, but of course, they don’t.”

I know there are a bunch of fat women out there thinking, “Wow, Kate Beckinsale is just like one of us!” But then you have to keep in mind that when she says she has trouble fitting into jeans, she’s talking about a size 0 and not XXL sweat pants. Have you seen her recently? Calling Kate Beckinsale fat would be like calling Mary-Kate Olsen the 2006 Pie Eating Champion. It’s just not true.



  1. SuperSpence

    Kate Beckinsale is the hottest vampire since Catherine Deneuve had her breasts licked by Susan Sarandon. [Deneuve and Sarandon never made a living killing werewolves either, which just goes to prove that bi-curious bloodsuckers are useless when you're about to get your ass handed to you by a 7-foot tall dog.]

    A former friend told me recently that “Underworld” wasn’t a documentary, it’s just a movie and that I shouldn’t actually assume that Kate Beckinsale kills werewolves in sewers while posing in skintight black outfits. But since I happen to know “Underworld” IS a documentary and that Kate Beckinsale is so supremely hot for me and only me, I had to kill that former friend and eat his heart to gain his secret powers. I’ll need all my strength if I’m going to help Kate rid the world of rabid skin-changers.

    By the way, none of you are welcome. Go get your own hot vampire chick. This one is taken.

  2. She just needs to stop smoking cigarettes and start snorting coke. Then maybe start smoking crack. Then maybe she wouldn’t think my being a crack dealer was such a bad thing.

  3. Juliette

    I have an overwhelming desire to knock her out.

  4. I have to say that Kate Beckinsale looks amazing lately. Why is she wasting away in those vampire movies? Can’t her agent get her something better than that?

  5. Manderoni

    Yeah….fuck her

  6. Autumn

    I think Kate is one of the most natural looking and classic actresses out there.

  7. Jayne

    She looks nice for a chick who’s battled anorexia I guess.
    Not my cup of tea but I wouldn’t refuse her either.

  8. Natural Looking?! Sign on to Aweful Plastic Surgery dot com and check out the nasty bob-stretch marks from that last implant surgery. I mean she’s good looking but I think natural is pushing it.

  9. She is not natural. Steroid creams are not natural. Cindy Crawford is natural. But that is besides the point.

    In my own opinion I think Kate Beckinsale is feeling her age kicking in. Realizing that if she lets herself go like Janet Jackson, her well maintained career will be ripped apart.

    Fat jokes ruin celebs. Look how long it took Oprah Winfrey to get away from the jokes.

  10. Krom

    She was at her hottest in “The Aviator,” playing the curvaceous Ava Gardner. During Ava’s day, Hollywood could recognize true feminine beauty.

  11. Juliette

    I don’t have much sympathy for someone who can’t squeeze into their size 0 or size 2 jeans. Does she think that makes her more relatable to the public? Hardly. No one likes skinny bitches complaining about not fitting their ‘fat ass’ into a pair of jeans.

    And yea her boobs are nasty.

  12. PapaHotNuts

    If Kate is considered fat, then I am going home and donkey-punching my girlfriend as I set all of her shit on fire. I used to think she had a decent body, but now that Kate thinks she may be fat, I have no choice but to call my girlfriend a lard-ass, chain her to the treadmill, and force enima’s of Slim-Fast into her rectum. Fuckin’ celebrities- always making me hate my girl.

  13. sammygirl

    She is a beautiful woman with body dysmorphic disorder. She couldn’t have a fat day if she tried.

    I once read that she was mortified by the “awfulplasticsurgery.com” article regarding her “fake” breasts. She said she got those stretch marks from when she was pregnant and not from any breast augmentation. I don’t know if she got a boob job or not, but I do believe her about the stretch marks.

    And Underworld was a great movie. I can’t wait to see Underworld:Evolution this Friday!!

  14. jennifer11

    she better watch it with the fat talk…
    if britney spears gets wind of it, she’ll eat her like so many ho-hos.

  15. Angela

    She does have a bit of thigh chub. I mean she’s skinny and all but she does seem to be carrying most of her weight around her thighs.

    Theres nothing wrong with her striving for perfection. I mean after all she is constantly under media attention. I would like to seen any women have themselves photographed, photoshopped, and scrutinized so many times and not feel uncomfortable about some part of their body.

    I agree though she is very pretty but I can see what she is talking about at the same time.

  16. Angela

    May I also note she has admitted a battle with anorexia int he past so she probably has a lot more stress about her weight than fatasses like Juliette.

    She’s not perfect and nobody ever is ever. She has reason to want to be though because hollywood expects her to be. Just because nobody cares that your a fatass doesn’t mean that she has nothing to complain about.

  17. miir

    >>>Natural Looking?! Sign on to Aweful Plastic Surgery dot com and check out the nasty bob-stretch marks from that last implant surgery.

    Uhhh, her breasts are pretty damn small.

    As for the pictures on that awful plastic surgery site…. Well, women’s breasts tend to increase in size after they give birth… and when they stop lactating, their breasts go back to their normal size.

    Seeing as Kate has a kid and her breats are small, stretch marks from a boob job seem pretty unlikely.

  18. AndyKandy

    This is why many Hollybod’s are anorexic….even Kate (and remember photos make a person look 10lbs fatter than they actually are) thinks she’s fat! Mind you, reading the abuse Britney gets because she just had a baby and is no longer “acceptable” (ie: thin with big tits)I can see why these Hollywood types obsess about every ounce. Somebody pass me the fried chicken!

  19. HollyJ

    @ 14 ..eat her like so many ho-hos LOL

    I wonder why it is that fat women can bitch and moan all they want about their “I feel fat” days, but when a slimmer woman has one of those days, she’s being a whiney bitch.

    Just because the fat girl can’t squeeze her pinky toe into a size 22, doesn’t mean she has the right to rob the size-2 girl of ever criticizing her own body. Sheesh.

    We all have the right to hate our bodies, no matter what size we are. We need a little insecurity equality.

  20. Kitchy

    Oh I’m so fat. . . I need more attention! F*&% you Kate. I hope Michael Moore accidently eats you so that you will understand what fat really is while you suffocate in it.

  21. I understand that no matter what size you are, that a woman will always feel like she is fat at times. But give me a fucking break. Kate, I think your gorgeous, but lets get real.

  22. derekd

    She’s not bad despite the mousy face and the fact that most British broads are butt ugly. I’d give her a dirty sanchez. 7 outta 10.

  23. Cheyenne_1

    Are all British women named Kate?

    Beckinsale has a beautiful face and body and actaully has some acting talent. it’s sad she even gives a second thought to being less than acceptable — I guess it’s the other side ofteh ocoin to the inbred narcissism it takes to be in the public eye all the time.

    She probably won’t really appreciate her own beauty and quit nitpicking herself until she’s in her 60s and looking back.

  24. HughJorganthethird

    Some mornings when I am pulling on MY jeans I also feel as if Kate Beckinsale has a fat ass.

  25. Realistic

    She’s hot. My jeans got tighter on me while I looked at her photos.

  26. Edie

    Okay. Here’s a some good information for all you men out there. Sit down, grab a cup of tea, cuddle up and let Momma E give you a little lesson in crazy-ass-chick-speak.

    LESSON 1: “Tell me more about my eyes!!!”

    Spectacularly good looking women are frequently high maintenence, crazy chicks who are borderline psychos. Not all of them, but many of them. The professions of “actress,” “dancer,” and “model” are also a fairly common indicator that you have a nutcase on your hands.

    The other indicator is listening to what she says, and what she means by what she says.

    Case study: Kate Beckinsale

    What she says: “Gawd, sometimes I feel so fat! I’m just fatty-fatty -fatty. Sometimes I just can’t fit into my size 5 jeans and I just have to stay inside until I don’t feel fat anymore.”

    What she means: “Please tell me I’m not fat, because I’m not and I know I’m not. I know that 5’8″ and 115 pounds isn’t fat, but I just need someone to tell me I look great. Please let the compliments begin because I’m insane and need constant attention and praise or else I might just drive off a cliff. Love me, please, or I’ll kill you.”

    Ladies and gentlemen, I give you Kate Beckinsale. One passive-agressive, crazy-ass chick. Go ahead and bang her, but for god’s sake, don’t give her your phone number.

  27. Hartigan'sGirl

    First off, that is complete and total crap.

    Second, Gisele used to have those days, too. Then she claimed to be agoraphobic. Then she started to demand $10,000 a day just to leave the house. Which brings me to my point. Kate Beckinsale is a cow. I mean, trying to take over the world. Skinny bitches of the world unite and demand more money for being cute!

  28. bluecanary

    I hate skinny women who complain about having “fat” days.

    That being said, the stretch marks probably ARE from her pregnancy. It happens to just about every woman who gives birth.

  29. Angela

    sammygirl that photograph is clearly photoshopped. Look at her thighs in paparazzi photos (such as the one of her working out in tight pants).

    It is likely that even though she is very skinny she is made skinnier constantly in photo spreads so logical she might feel insecure.

    I really don’t see why on earth so many girls are posting criticizing her for being insecure. Just because they weigh more doesn’t mean she has any less of a right to feel insecure.

  30. Sheva

    Kate is looking just damn good, end of story. I passed through the Gay Globe Awards last night and she was just looking absolutely great. Kate, give up the stick, do it for me cuz I can’t date a chick who smokes.

    Yeah I hear she’s married and a mom too, no? Well as for the British women, she’s top of the heap. The ones that look good, look amazing.

    And she’s definitely one of them.

    Kate do us all a favor and just enjoy your damn fine life.
    No more attention seeking, tell me I ain’t fat bullshit.

  31. derekd

    Why would someone with a perfeclt good body go ahead and ruin it by having a baby. I mean the nerve of some people. I mean, we have to look at you lady, it’s your job.LMFAO!!!!!

  32. slinkhard

    ‘I have an overwhelming desire to knock her out.’

    I have since her stupid-ass ‘Mrs. Wiseman’ clothes, and her blathering interviews about how she’s arrived as a wife by baking bread.

  33. what a pig,if she gets any fatter how will she be able to get any good skeleton roles?
    jesus…women’s minds have been conditioned to believe they have to look like skinny little boys to look attractive.i wonder if there’s any corrolation between that and most top fashion designers being gay males.nahhh,
    couldnt be.

  34. Dzchordant

    She does have a bit of thigh chub. I mean she’s skinny and all but she does seem to be carrying most of her weight around her thighs.

    I agree with Angela. Saw a close up of her thighs on a skyshowbiz.com pic. I also saw the pic of her breasts at awful plastic surgery.com and I disagree that she’s had work done. Just looks like plain ole stretch marks to me. Even the hottest looking women have things they don’t like and Kate sure is hot imho. She’s also allowed to feel insecure, celebs endure some pretty intense scrutiny. If they didn’t we would’t be posting this stuff, s’why I’m sitting here typing this for ince. Loved Underworld, can’t wait to see the sequel!

  35. LittleGoddess

    First of All: regardless of how thin you are, as a woman you are going to have fat ass days.
    Second: Kate is not a size 0 or 2 as you think. She is a 6. BIG difference.
    Third: Get over it you shallow people. She is a human being just like the rest of us and deserves a little respect.

  36. derriereupgrade

    I was a fan of Kates father before his untimely death and can only admire her courage and strength in carrying on the family tradition.
    As to claiming to have a fat ass, well as the saying goes “No two people ever have the same view!”

    Best wishes Kate.


  37. on second thought – i like fat asses! http://hollywoodsnark.com

  38. paul B

    all woman should be as fat as kate.

  39. Chadwick

    derriereupgrade@yahoo.com is a paedophile. He is a 69 year old man who posts photos of naked underage boys on the internet. Had to remove such a photo of his and ban him from our online community.

  40. derriereupgrade@yahoo.com is a paedophile. He is a 69 year old man who posts photos of naked underage boys on the internet. Had to remove such a photo of his and ban him from our online community. He probably was a fan of Kate before she became 18…

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