Sports Illustrated Swimsuit: 50 Years of Beautiful

By: The Superficial / January 15, 2014

Kate Upton‘s giant breasts were at the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit: 50 Years of Beautiful event last night, so I don’t know why I’m even writing anything else or bothering to point out that Christie Brinkley is an ageless vampire. Or wondering why I didn’t lead with Genevieve Morton who, honestly, looks way hotter than Kate, so now I’m questioning if I even know what the hell I’m doing anymo- *gets slapped in the face by Photo Boy* You’re right, old chum. A true titsmith never questions his tittery. To victory! *rides off into the Internet*

Photos: Getty