Because he’s Batman, Jesus and the Easter Bunny all rolled into your uncle who always wanted to wrestle a lot for some reason, Terry Richardson just released outtakes from his GQ photo shoot with Kate Upton which is all information that only people with a vagina just read, so I should probably make this word stuff more targeted to their demographic:
It was then that Christian took me into his office, his eyes filled with a desire I knew all too well. Slowly, he reached into his pants, and I knew he was about to give me exactly what I wanted. A soft, supple yet firm wallet filled with money that I didn’t have to earn.
“Buy shoes,” he said. “Then, later, we’ll watch reality television and I’ll be interested in it because it means a lot to you which doesn’t make you a shallow person.”
Moments later, we got married in a castle and it was better than my friend Jenny’s wedding. She was so jealous. Ohmygod, did he just pull my pubes?
Fin.
Photos: Terry Richardson
I don’t know whether to fucking hate Terry Richardson or pray to him at night. I’m so confused.
Now that is a nice pair o’ boobies
Terry Richardson is like a modern-day roman polanski.
But i love Upton. She’s pretty, she has a realistic body, and she seems to not care what people think.
but still, she hangs out with terry richardson.
it’s not uncommon for beautiful women to perfer to hang out with ugly men….especially considering most men are ugly anyway.
terri richardson is disgusting & sleazy. But he’s famous, and most starlets would sell their soul to the devil to get that boost to their ow fame.
Faptastic!
More than a handful is usually a waste, but in this case I am willing to make an exception
Some one should produce a new and updated version of BayWatch.
What would make this pic even better, is if she was getting plowed, and they did a gif image of those beasts flopping up and down in slow motion.
that’s exactly where my mind went.
Great perverts think alike ;-)
If you are a man and that was not your immediate first thought, then congratulations, you are a gay man.
That was going to be my response too.
What would be even better if I was plowing her.
Who the fuck gives this a thumbs down? Mom, I’m looking at you…
Good. God.
“I dont’ always take my pants off, but when I do, it’s for some really good coke.”
that mole on her lip is a little distracting. Let’s see if I can buff that off…with my penis.
Now we just need a giant scimitar to slice her in half and stitch Jessica Biel’s lower body back on.
Thank you for agreeing. Doesnt her body look weird from her breast down ? I know guys wouldnt notice or care but…
I dont know how gay guys are gay.
Because getting pussy you have to work for it—getting dick well…
I can answer this by just saying one word…photoshop. She doesn’t look as good in person. Everything about being beautiful as a female is an illusion.
Mine? Sure.
My credit card number is 4435 3211 26…..
That’s some incredibly green grass right there
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I ……i…….I”M NOT WORTHY!!!!
Golly!!
Best photos to hit Superficial in years!
Fish,
This is the funniest, most well written post you’ve ever done, and I’ve been a fan for years. Bravo sir, bravo.
hahaha, I didnt even read what he wrote until you mentioned it.
This guy.
Sweet baby jesus.
Why is her implant going into her armpit? Idk, I dont find this womans face that attractive, and her fake tits are a turn off, more than a handful is wasteful unless your a porn star, I like little perky boobies, REAL ones, not these droopy fakes. pass.
You are either a troll or a 40 year old virgin.
THOSE, are not fake tits.
You can see the edge of the implant in her left breast in the first photo.
Thats a skin fold. They fall towards her armpit and partially into it. That is what real boobs do. Fake ones stay up when you lay on your back. I know, it is hard to accept that some girls are blessed with really big boobs naturally but it does happen.
Clearly, Mike, you have never been with a woman with large breasts while she was on her back. That picture pretty much proves that there’s no implants. Those are what real boobs look like in that type of position.
She’s a beautiful girl, but those do look fake from that angle. And angles are not an implant’s best friend….ask Kate Beckinsale.
http://chatterbusy.blogspot.ca/2012/05/kate-upton-implants.html
Implants, people, good ones, but fakers nonetheless.
Areola?
No, her name is Kate. Weren’t you paying attention?
without the boobs her body would so completely underwhelming.
And without the coke and haggard appearance, LiLo would be hot again. Your point?
Sort of like saying without a vagina, a woman’s purpose is underwhelming. DON”T ARGUE WITH REALITY!!!! THE BOOBS ARE THERE!
sure…
you have an eye for the obvious
This photo could bring world peace.
Wait a minute… what’s happening to my Special Purpose!?
Jerk!
Ok, so I read it, but my first thought was…BOOBIES!…and I’m not that interested in shoes.
Fuck!!! One of the greatest photos in human history.
Jesus wept.
That is, Jesus, the pool cleaner.
Yes, this picture is missing my genitals in her mouth.
Terry Richardson is a skeezy dude, and based on his past, I’m pretty sure he has some other pictures of him nailing Upton.
lily wishes she didn’t have lesbian fantasies all the time, but…
Da Man, you got it all figured out, don’t you? That’s why you’re fapping in front of the computer – smart!
Da Man would have us believe that this is an illusion, but w – uuuunh… oops I just came
Out of his penis (Jesus wept)
I just made this my desktop wallpaper on my work computer. I don’t even care about getting fired. Totally worth it.
are boobs really so impressive to men that they override the rest of a girl’s body & face? I just don’t get the appeal here.. yes she has big boobs… and??
… thin long legs and a flat stomach?
… and I stopped listening to you after you asked me to look at her impressive boobs.
Are salaries really so impressive to women that they override the rest of a man’s personality and demeanor?
In short, yes.
I assume Photoboy exploded into a million tiny pieces.
I think you mean that he came fifty shades of grey.
I wonder what her vagina tastes like?
Like Terry Richardson’s thumb
ask Justin Verlander!
Wow those are impressive and she grew them all by herself.
Such a talent.
To those nay sayers who claim that the US doesn’t manufacture anything good anymore…..exhibit A: Kate Upton.
Fuck your thumb.
The hip-less wonder.
You hit it. That’s what seems wrong about her. No hips, no waist. Makes her tummy look like the Sahara Desert. Huge.
There are those who call her a fat sow.
I think that they must have some serious issues.
I take back all those things I said about Terry Richardson. He is an under-appreciated god among men.
This is the one and only reason God created water
Fap-tastic (copy right)
This picture is the reason why women get breast implants
A blonde with implants? How original!
Oh my fucking god. If there was such a thing as heaven this would be it.