Because he’s Batman, Jesus and the Easter Bunny all rolled into your uncle who always wanted to wrestle a lot for some reason, Terry Richardson just released outtakes from his GQ photo shoot with Kate Upton which is all information that only people with a vagina just read, so I should probably make this word stuff more targeted to their demographic:
It was then that Christian took me into his office, his eyes filled with a desire I knew all too well. Slowly, he reached into his pants, and I knew he was about to give me exactly what I wanted. A soft, supple yet firm wallet filled with money that I didn’t have to earn.
“Buy shoes,” he said. “Then, later, we’ll watch reality television and I’ll be interested in it because it means a lot to you which doesn’t make you a shallow person.”
Moments later, we got married in a castle and it was better than my friend Jenny’s wedding. She was so jealous. Ohmygod, did he just pull my pubes?
Fin.
Photos: Terry Richardson
She’s fucking perfect.
I’m usually one of her detractors, but right now I’m being forced to approve under duress of a gun barrell being held against my chin- no wait, it’s my dick. Damn it.
And they gave the EU the Nobel Prize? This woman could bring peace to the Middle East and then some. I’m appointing her the supreme goddess of the world. Or at least of my world.
How is this a goddamn outtake?
You can see the implant outlines
It’s a sad world when even obviously real tits are being called fake. As a female, I can vouch for her that those are real. When a woman has large breasts and then lays on her back, they kind of slide to the side and into her armpit. With the amount of tissue she has in her boobs, there’s going to be an outline where the breast tissue starts to fall on top of regular tissue. Especially in a place where there’s a significan slope downwards, like the armpit area when she’s laying down. That tissue doesn’t just melt away, it has to go somewhere. If they were fake, they would still be incredibly rounded and at attention, so to speak.
Krissy, you know fuck-all about real tits, because those are as fake as they come.
Those are real, honey. Someone sounds like a bitter A-cup.
Krissy, I hear you. I’m a guy that hates it too. I go to myfreecams a lot and if a girl has boobs that don’t move at all. There’s always a dumbfuck guy asking if they are real and vice versa. This guy must be a virgin and never touched a boob. And knows shit about physics. Those tits are real. If you see any “lines”, they are stretch marks.
LOL! She is 100% real. Fake tits don’t bounce and jiggle like hers.
That’s as natural as it can get! Whoever says those tits are fake has issues! or hasn’t had a pair of nice jiggly natural funbags in their hands!
Sweet Jesus. I would switch teams to motorboat the fuck outta those babies.
Waaaaay too many moles
Fuckin’ Hipster prick. I’ve got an idea, why not put your glasses ON EVERY FUCKIN PERSON YOU TAKE A PICTURE OF!? That’ll be cool. Cunt.
sweet god, i just jizzed in my pants three times in the last five minutes
Except she doesn’t have implants genius.
Peekaboo!
Sigh. Time for me to get those implants I was considering.
DAMN you, Verlander.
Who’s ready for mustache rides!
I’d motorboat her boobs and have some fun with her anus.
Going to the beach? Let me put on my long sleeve flannel shirt.
nipples
Excellent. I wonder if her back hurts, though.
AWESOME!!!!
Fucking sweet!