Kate Upton Bikini Photos Because Terry Richardson Is Goddamn Santa Claus

October 12th, 2012 // 112 Comments

Because he’s Batman, Jesus and the Easter Bunny all rolled into your uncle who always wanted to wrestle a lot for some reason, Terry Richardson just released outtakes from his GQ photo shoot with Kate Upton which is all information that only people with a vagina just read, so I should probably make this word stuff more targeted to their demographic:

It was then that Christian took me into his office, his eyes filled with a desire I knew all too well. Slowly, he reached into his pants, and I knew he was about to give me exactly what I wanted. A soft, supple yet firm wallet filled with money that I didn’t have to earn.
“Buy shoes,” he said. “Then, later, we’ll watch reality television and I’ll be interested in it because it means a lot to you which doesn’t make you a shallow person.”
Moments later, we got married in a castle and it was better than my friend Jenny’s wedding. She was so jealous. Ohmygod, did he just pull my pubes?

Fin.

Photos: Terry Richardson

superficial

  1. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Commented on this photo:

    She’s fucking perfect.

  2. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m usually one of her detractors, but right now I’m being forced to approve under duress of a gun barrell being held against my chin- no wait, it’s my dick. Damn it.

  3. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Sardonic
    Commented on this photo:

    And they gave the EU the Nobel Prize? This woman could bring peace to the Middle East and then some. I’m appointing her the supreme goddess of the world. Or at least of my world.

  4. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Piper
    Commented on this photo:

    How is this a goddamn outtake?

  5. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Naw
    Commented on this photo:

    You can see the implant outlines

    • Krissy

      It’s a sad world when even obviously real tits are being called fake. As a female, I can vouch for her that those are real. When a woman has large breasts and then lays on her back, they kind of slide to the side and into her armpit. With the amount of tissue she has in her boobs, there’s going to be an outline where the breast tissue starts to fall on top of regular tissue. Especially in a place where there’s a significan slope downwards, like the armpit area when she’s laying down. That tissue doesn’t just melt away, it has to go somewhere. If they were fake, they would still be incredibly rounded and at attention, so to speak.

      • Connie Lingus

        Krissy, you know fuck-all about real tits, because those are as fake as they come.

      • Krissy

        Those are real, honey. Someone sounds like a bitter A-cup.

      • whomsoever

        Krissy, I hear you. I’m a guy that hates it too. I go to myfreecams a lot and if a girl has boobs that don’t move at all. There’s always a dumbfuck guy asking if they are real and vice versa. This guy must be a virgin and never touched a boob. And knows shit about physics. Those tits are real. If you see any “lines”, they are stretch marks.

    • TJ

      LOL! She is 100% real. Fake tits don’t bounce and jiggle like hers.

    • quickrick

      That’s as natural as it can get! Whoever says those tits are fake has issues! or hasn’t had a pair of nice jiggly natural funbags in their hands!

  6. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Fai
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Jesus. I would switch teams to motorboat the fuck outta those babies.

  7. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Ass Clown
    Commented on this photo:

    Waaaaay too many moles

  8. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    vandinz
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuckin’ Hipster prick. I’ve got an idea, why not put your glasses ON EVERY FUCKIN PERSON YOU TAKE A PICTURE OF!? That’ll be cool. Cunt.

  9. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Salman Goodman
    Commented on this photo:

    sweet god, i just jizzed in my pants three times in the last five minutes

  10. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    arkjoker
    Commented on this photo:

    Except she doesn’t have implants genius.

  11. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    lawn
    Commented on this photo:

    Peekaboo!

  12. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    salliemae
    Commented on this photo:

    Sigh. Time for me to get those implants I was considering.

  13. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    That Dude
    Commented on this photo:

    DAMN you, Verlander.

  14. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Don Lengua
    Commented on this photo:

    Who’s ready for mustache rides!

  15. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Skeeter
    Commented on this photo:

    I’d motorboat her boobs and have some fun with her anus.

  16. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    whomsoever
    Commented on this photo:

    Going to the beach? Let me put on my long sleeve flannel shirt.

  17. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Tommy T
    Commented on this photo:

    nipples

  18. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Commented on this photo:

    Excellent. I wonder if her back hurts, though.

  19. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Jerry
    Commented on this photo:

    AWESOME!!!!

  20. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Gerry
    Commented on this photo:

    Fucking sweet!

  21. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Commented on this photo:

    yum shes got the chocolate chip nips

  22. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m totally jacking off to this!

  23. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    luke
    Commented on this photo:

    yeah I noticed that and couldn;t believe it areola?!

  24. Kate Upton Nipples Bikini Outtakes Terry Richardson Shoot
    Donald Brisson
    Commented on this photo:

    Kate, I just want to say that you are the most beautiful lady i have ever seen. Your admirer Donald

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