March 21st, 2014 // 21 Comments

Here’s Kate Upton filming Good Morning America this morning where her breasts decided they had enough of her Midwest housewife outfit and tried to bust the hell out. That, or they sensed Scarlett Johansson‘s and prepared for battle, so you know what? Forget the other stuff I said. It’s that. Let’s say that stuff happened.

Photos: Splash News


  1. goddamn i love women that look like dumbfuckin’ corn fed country gals. a little thick and a lot dumb. YES!

    • Polk

      She’s even got the overbite horse teeth. Redneck women get fat quick, but there is a small window that’s just about perfect, where the fat cells are still firm and tight.

      I expect Kate to be wearing Jessica Simpson’s clothing line in 4 years.

    • Cock Dr

      She would probably laugh at any joke you told her and would cook up a great breakfast in the morning. Be prepared to assume all contraceptive responsibilities.

  2. Dark Knight

    Tom Brady just publicly announced that he if he didn’t have a contract in NE and Denver didn’t have Manning that he would play for the Broncos for free because he wants to win another Super Bowl before he retires.

  3. Kate Upton Breasts Shirt Popping Open
    Commented on this photo:

    They can hear me calling to them! They’re trying to escape and come to me! Come, my mam-tastic children! Escape your master and live in bliss with me!

  4. anonym

    the most overpaid ordinary looking girl

    clothes do not look good on her

  5. Kate Upton Breasts Shirt Popping Open
    Commented on this photo:

    The amount of stress on that top button must be incredible. Forget thread, she’s gotta be using 80lb test on those buttons.

  6. sigh, welcome to the life of having breasts and never being able to wear button ups

  7. NSST

    It’s odd. I’ve had breasts all my life, and every time I had an issue like that, I bought the next size up. If your shirt fits, it won’t do that. Yep – a little thick and a WHOLE lotta dumb…..

    • Johnny Barbells


    • Gen

      Actually, when your breasts aren’t the standard size, then all standard-sized clothes don’t quite fit you waist and tits at the same time. So unless you want to run around wearing big tented-out shirts, this happens all the time.

  8. Johnny Barbells

    “her proud yet supple bosoms heave mightily against the constraints of her tiny bikini…” ~frasier crane

  9. gigi

    feh…. stick this chick back in that gravity thingy — best environment for all of what’s going on there

  10. her body is ALMOST manly in an elderly way – except for the tits. That shouldN’T be enough, kim k and many cafeteria lunch ladies have big tits, but most people think jessica alba is hotter, no?

    40 inch waist, baseball bat calves, smile full of gums and not much teeth. meh

  11. Kate Upton Breasts Shirt Popping Open
    Grab me
    Commented on this photo:

    Her hands look like they are griping Justin’s bat!

  12. Fuck her now! Cause she’s super young, slightly lard ass, blond and stupid. Fuck yeah!
    But in 15 years she’ll be goddamn train wreck.

  13. She should stick to print and Web where they can airbrush the shit out of her.

  14. Jforbes

    Uptown just needs a breast job she is not firm for a young girl too loose and saggy her smile is also too Bucky what’s wrong with Si they should be out of busines!!!!! Cmon she does not even have a waisteline

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