Okay, This Kate Upton Photo Shoot Got Interesting

November 26th, 2013 // 61 Comments

Initially, we skipped these Kate Upton photos because going by the thumbnails, they looked boring as shit. But then we examined them closer and found a beautiful, romantic synergy between sand, woman, and beast- boobs. We saw her boobs. And underwear! Real girl ones, too. Photo Boy didn’t believe me back at the treehouse until I went for the cootie spray. He knew then. He knew then…

Photos: Raef-Ramirez/AKM-GSI

superficial

  1. renotastic

    God bless Kate and her oddly-shaped body. She’s keeping it real for real girls everywhere.

  2. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    The way you played up her breasts I could’ve sworn they were bare. This is boring. I’m disappointed.

  3. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Well this one is what was advertized. Very nice shot.

  4. I’m frequently caught off-guard by how much other women hate Kate Upton. It’s as though they could take being upstaged by the impossibly, unhealthily thin typical model but men fawning over someone with a more average body type (except for those two glorious tittays) is just too much to take. My wife, her friends, and most of the women I work with all hate her guts. They all call her fat.

    While I understand this is hardly a consensus I see a lot more of the same on the interwebs. It’s like she’s the canvas upon which women the world over project their own body issues and insecurities. Frankly, I dig it. I love her body type. Rail thin women have never done anything for me. I do not find it attractive in the least. I will take a woman with some solid curves every time.

    • They don’t mind it when men fawn over the rail thin supermodel type because they know you’ll never get a woman like that and like to see you torture yourself over it.

      But a woman with Kate’s body type is gettable, it’s damn near the norm. And they most likely don’t match up to her. It’s like you’re cheating on her when you fantasize about this gettable woman. She must be destroyed.

      • that’s a pretty brilliant analysis

      • Dox

        Overall, its sadly insecure. Is Kate Upton pretty? Sure she is. The simple fact is, that beauty does not make a relationship. Sexual attraction without anything to anchor it to, becomes boring. I want more from a partner than that….

        Quite frankly, I want a woman that is highly trained in small arms, close quarter combat, slightly sociopathic, with a deep sense of loyalty, and slightly warped sense of humor. Asian would be a plus, if I get the bonus round.

        I have no idea why I shared that. At all.
        Think I’ll go now.

      • We might have to fight to the death over that chick.

      • P.T.S. Potential Trouble Source

        You ever been to the deep south? Bunch of them like that down there, just don’t cheat on them

      • Dox

        Are you kidding?
        I wouldn’t cheat on a woman like that. I’d rub her feet, and tell her how fucking badass she was. We’d take turns spiking each other into the headboard….. I’d never even consider looking at another woman. Ever. Again.

        I mean… who the hell would want to, after seeing perfection?

      • Everyone is fat in the deep south. Not hard to find a the thin but sexy types on the Coasts. Kate Upton is the new Jessica Simpson – she reminds men of their overweight mommas, in a sexy version.

      • Rasputin's Evil Twin

        Don’t worry – at this site, that’s fairly okay. McFeely Smackup might rank it as a bit vanilla, but that’s fine. You might want to see if Kimmykimkin is available. That is all.

    • It just makes little sense to women when men put a woman on a golden pedestal who looks less attractive than 80% of the girls at the local mall just because she has big tits.

      It may seem counterintuitive, but most women think the rail-thin models (to an extent) are ideal beauty. Women ‘get’ why men fawn over, say, Adriana Lima, because she’s what is considered an ideal beauty. Kate more often than not just looks like a sloppy idiot with big jugs, and the fact that men go bananas over that confuses most women.

      It’s the ‘WTF? I have a better ass/waist/face than her, so why aren’t men everywhere dropping at my feet too?’ syndrome.

      • Yes. I agree with this statement. I think Adriana Lima and Laeticia Casta are drop-dead gorgeous and I can admire their beauty 100%. I do agree that Kate just kind of lucked out with a cute face and gigantic boobs.

      • P.T.S. Potential Trouble Source

        Her attitude, pretend or not, doesn’t hurt either.

    • I love Kate! I think she’s very pretty!! I don’t understand why women hate on any other woman, except maybe Miley Cyrus, but that’s just because she’s a moron. I love Adriana Lima, too! I appreciate the beauty that everyone has to offer and I’m secure enough with myself not to care if my man appreciates beauty, too. As long as appreciate doesn’t = getting naked together, we’re good! LOL

    • Some women also have the mentality that if you’re going to cheat on them it better be with a woman way hotter than me. I guess they see Kate as an average woman (lol) and think they’re as good as or better than her, so it pisses them off to see their men drooling over a woman they consider to be average.

    • EM

      FFS, it’s NOT about ‘weight!!’

      Your friends are morons for calling her ‘fat,’ just as YOU’RE a moron for calling her curvy.

      Upton’s problem isn’t that she’s overweight, it’s that her body SHAPE is weird as F*#&! She has thin, chicken legs and a huge barrel-gut of a torso. The only reason she ever got this job is because of her family connections, and the only reason she remains popular is because her photoshoots are massively photoshopped and she always emphasizes her big tits (her ONLY asset) to draw attention away from everything else. THIS is what’s pi$$ing people off (many straight men included!).

      There’s NOTHING ‘healthy’ or ‘curvy’ about her. Katy Perry weighs the same, but HER body is infinitely better than this boxy broad’s. It’s ALL about body shape, NOT THE WEIGHT!!!

      Geez!

  5. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Gary Grant
    Commented on this photo:

    I went full size and just licked the screen

  6. Love her.
    The super skinny photoshopped crap gets old pretty fast.

    We still have NO CHANCE with her, but the illusion of it happening is a little more believable.

  7. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    The horse is thinking the same thing you are. He just gave up vegetarianism.

  8. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Deacon Jones
    Commented on this photo:

    that would be great if he had a hard on

  9. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Katherine the Great Upton, crushed while having sex with a horse.

    See, history does repeat itself.

  10. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Isn’t this the part where Kanye hops on and says “Uh-huh, honey”?

  11. You got to love her, she is kind of sloppy and trashy, but still hot with huge, awesome boobs, seems like tons of fun too and not a stuck up asshole.

    • Michael

      Hopefully people can take your words of wisdom.

      Also, here’s an interesting quote from a friend regarding doubts of whether or not Kate will be getting fat or whatnot: “She’s not just gonna up and ruin her career. She makes a lot of money. Enough to keep anyone to convince themselves to keep in shape.”

  12. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    I see nothing wrong here.

  13. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    This is also acceptable.

  14. I love that she is a real-looking girl with body fat and a seemingly nice personality. However, she needs to watch it and exercise regularly or things could go south very quickly. She doesn’t look very fit, just naturally on the thin side.

    • Michael

      Like I told El Jefe: “She’s not just gonna up and ruin her career. She makes a lot of money. Enough to keep anyone to convince themselves to keep in shape.”

  15. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Yes she has a sloppy midsection; an actual spare tire of torso fat rings her waistline, but she is just so goddamned cute.

    • EM

      Yeah, she’s ‘cute’… IF you can get passed the mustache, the gummy grin, those yellow toddler teeth, the mustache, the mole, the nose hairs, the mustache, the porcine face, those beedy eyes, the mustache, the spec-ed IQ, oh!, and that mustache!

  16. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    AC
    Commented on this photo:

    “I watched Sex & the City every Saturday growing up. You were my role model. May I have the honor of feeding you sugar lumps after the shoot?”

  17. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    sc4play
    Commented on this photo:

    Um, horse is a female there guys.

  18. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Skeeter
    Commented on this photo:

    Would love to dive in there and thoroughly tongue-bang her asshole and vag.

  19. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Even the emo kid likes what he’s seeing

  20. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Dick Johnson
    Commented on this photo:

    Emo teen forgets about Nietzche for a second. The Abyss is staring back at you, kid.

  21. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Triple bonus score.

  22. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Kate Gains Weight
    Commented on this photo:

    Tom Brady’s wife had 2 kids, and she’s the same weight as
    she has been for the past 15 years. She’s still a top 5 supermodel.
    Kate Upton goes up and down like a YoYo, and is a wild weekend
    away from never getting hired again. Happy Thanksgiving Kate!.

  23. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Joy
    Commented on this photo:

    The “wow… a really am a hooker” look is beginning to show in her expressions.

  24. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Did Terry Richardson take these shots??
    “Come on honey, just lie down in the sand. Oh, yeah, and lift up your legs. Don’t worry, these shots will be artistic”

  25. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice rolls…

  26. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Them rolls… That’s why she’s wearing the shirt.

  27. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    crb
    Commented on this photo:

    But why the SJP?

  28. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Oprah Sucks
    Commented on this photo:

    Kate Upton for President! Seriously, the US is run by corporations anyway. Why not let the people look at nice rack during one of those boring State of The Union Speeches.

  29. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Oprah Sucks
    Commented on this photo:

    Kate Upton for President! Seriously, the US is run by corporations anyway. Why not let the people look at nice rack during one of those boring State of The Union Speeches.

  30. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Oprah Sucks
    Commented on this photo:

    I only pressed submit once. I swear.

  31. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Motorboat Captain
    Commented on this photo:

    And I heard, as it were the noise of thunder, one of the four beasts saying, Come and see.
    And I saw, and beheld a piebald horse, and her name that sat on him was Spank Bank, and Fap followed with him.

  32. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    ipunjab
    Commented on this photo:

    Holy crap, she is gorgeous.

  33. EM

    Chicken legs galore!!! Oh, and it was nice of them to finally give her photoshop warriors a much needed break by covering her refrigerator torso.

  34. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    martina
    Commented on this photo:

    oh my …. mm mm mm
    {{{sigh}}}

  35. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    martina
    Commented on this photo:

    mmmmmmmmmmm
    hmmmmmmmmmmm

  36. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    martina
    Commented on this photo:

    just look at that ass … mnmmmmmm

  37. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    would be nice if they’re setting up for a bestiality scene here

  38. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Commented on this photo:

    Güzel:

  39. Kate Upton Bikini Butt Thong Horseback
    Me
    Commented on this photo:

    Fuck u asshole @ashanty She is beautiful!

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