Jon Gosselin Tells Kate To Stop Bitching

September 8th, 2011 // 83 Comments

Yesterday, People released an exclusive interview with Kate Gosselin where she revealed she’s “freaking out” about how she’s going to provide for her kids now that Kate Plus 8 has been canceled, mostly because she’s been pissing all her money away on tummy tucks and new Audis (above). Enter Jon Gosselin who’s somehow managed to come out of this thing no longer looking like the douchebag sudden, questionable-pussy-laden freedom will turn a divorcee into, but instead a sane, level-headed survivor of the kind of marriage most men will only experience in the darkest of nightmares. RumorFix reports:

Jon, who doesn’t speak to the former star of Kate Plus 8, has some surprisingly stinging words for America’s most famous mom: “Reality TV is not a career. Get back to a normal life — a simple life. Provide for your family.”
… Although Kate says she is “freaking out” about her financial future, Jon is optimistic. “Things will work out the way they should work out. Obviously there are families out there that have several kids – people work normal jobs and things work out. Everything is possible,” he tells RumorFix.
And what if the Dancing with the Stars alum has to unload her huge farm home in Pennsylvania? Jon has absolutely no sympathy, “I don’t have a farm on 24 acres and the kids seem to have a great time at my house.”

When reached for comment, Kate responded, “Typical Jon. Of course, he’s going to say children don’t need a mother who gets free fabulous vacations without them to live a healthy, normal life. And is he honestly suggesting we live in a house where I don’t have a separate wing to live in while strangers raises the kids? HA! Thanks for the parenting advice- Colin! Did you just put a fingerprint on mommy’s Audi?! That’s it, young man. You’re going to live in the mountain nest. *picks him up in her talons, flies off* SKRREEEEEEE!!”

Photo: INFdaily


  1. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
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  2. leelou

    haha! superficial finally made me laugh again :) feels good

  3. Disco Dave

    Shockingly…Jon Gosselin FTW.

  4. Flooby

    I have never been more happy

  5. JuicyLucy

    She should sign up for a “celebrity” boxing match with Tanya Harding.

  6. cc

    Kate Gosselin trying to elicit sympathy…that in itself is one of the better jokes I’ve heard lately.

  7. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
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    15 minutes for your 15 minutes…

  8. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
    Commented on this photo:

    Her 15 minutes are up…

  9. juck

    Yet she drives an Audi? lol Horrid cunt but god i wanna fuck her lol

  10. Deacon Jones

    Did someone try defrosting Kendra Wilkonson in the microwave or something?

  11. drunk again

    I would love to play with kates funbags and tickle her anus with my tongue. While I lock her kids in the basement .. I need a beer now..

  12. stratacat

    bar rafaeli. bikini. NOW.

  13. Nadia S.

    Because really, what’s more practical for a mom of 8 children than a two door sports coupe? God I hope she Ryan Dunn’s that thing around a telephone pole.

    • Jillia

      Yea because everyone knows that the money just keeps rolling in and you can spend as much as you want. Just ask Nick Cage. Or MC Hammer. A fool and their money are soon parted.

      Did she really think the reality TV money was just going to keep flowing in? You have 8 children to worry about and you’re flushing your money away on lavish homes, cars, plastic surgery, and vacations? Greedy little bitch, ain’t she? Put your money away and live comfortably Kate!

  14. Revan

    Kate has a full staff which costs $500,000: “Kate employs two housekeepers, two nannies, an assistant, and bodyguard Steve Neil

    The mom-of-eight’s $2,000 hair: “That’s what Kate paid last year for a cut, color and Brazilian keratin treatment at Ted Gibson’s NYC salon.”

    Kate’s sprawling $1.3 million estate: “Kate’s 6,000 square foot five-bedroom mansion in Wernersville, Pa., sits on 24 secluded acres.”

    Kate spends $500,000 on her children’s private school: “Her kids are in private school. At 5 grand a month for each child that adds up.”

    Kate’s shopping sprees that costs ???: “Kate’s fashion tab is hard to know. TLC picked up much of it — but she loves to shop!”

    nuff said..

    take those kids to public school, private school for kids that young is useless
    2k for haircuts?
    and a 1.3 mil house? come on now

  15. Tristyn

    This greedy bitch deserves to lose it all ..

  16. Joe Blow

    How does she manage to haul around eight kids in that new Audi?

  17. Cripes, millions of welfare mommies have shit out more kids and don’t drive an Audi. Hop on that, Obama.

    • Any Guy

      ah, yet another uptight conservative (oxymoron – with the emphasis on ‘moron’) dragging Obama into it. have fun with your excellent Republican candidates. watch last night’s debate? I doubt you did. fraud.

      • America

        Relax, Mac-totting Liberal who is overly defensive and praises Obama for doing nothing.

      • actually, yes I did. honestly? not too impressed with them either, but any one of them could fart out a Presidency better than Obama. Do you really want to get into how lame this guy has been?

    • Venom

      Listening to your redneck Republican retards is truly a treat and a view into the brain or lack thereof of a simpleton.

      Here is a clue, welfare has existed for decades and decades under Republican and Democratic presidents.
      The majority of people on welfare are also white.
      Republicans are also on welfare and SS disability.

      What Obama should have done was pull out of both wars and send the whole lot of you in the military straight to the unemployment lines and save this country billions of dollars. You hicks should be thankful to him, he has allowed you to keep your jobs and your health care and benefits.

      • Another Dem who thinks that all Republicans are hillbilly morons. Do you people ever listen to yourselves?

        The majority, as a percentage, are Black. Welfare is nothing more than 21st century slavery. LBJ should burn in hell for instigating this system.

        And as usual, nice to see a Dem who shits on the military. Asshole.

      • CranAppleSnapple

        Wow, Eric. You are one of the dumbest people I’ve ever read.
        And Republicans must be hillbilly rednecks. It’s the only thing that can explain their attitudes and behaviour.

      • That’s the habitual fallback position of the liberal left – that the conservative right is made up of retards and morons and that the left is somehow smarter and more enlightened. This moral superiority is apparent in your choice for President, who two years later, is even more aloof and pedantic than he was when he was elected (if that’s even possible). God, you Volvo driving twits annoy me. It would be almost fun to watch him go down in flames in 2012 if the price we paid for four years of his nonsense wasn’t so painful.

        Oh and the superfluous “u” in behavior? Nice touch, Nancy.

      • CranAppleSnapple

        It’s not superfluous, jackass, it’s correct. If you’re English.
        And as usual you are all blowhard and no substance.

      • CranAppleSnapple

        Actually, I am curious about that. Why DO Americans leave out so many letters in words? Laziness? Expediency?

      • We probably leave them out to differentiate ourselves from the pompous blowhard English whose opinions on American politics don’t mean much, since they still bow before a Queen.

      • Cardinal Ximenez

        That was quite possibly the most amazingly uninformed rant I’ve ever seen on here. Bravo Venom, your education is paying off in spades.

    • susan

      Eric, you eloquent point is that you believe:

      A) Millions of women on public assistance have given birth to more than 8 children. (okay genius, find two….)

      B) You hate yourself and your mother so much you equate you birth with shit.

      c) You didn’t read the article but like to comment on Obama every chance you get regardless of how unrelated the comment may be as opposed to doing anything meaningful with your life.

  18. How can she fit her uterus into that tiny car?

  19. just here for laughs

    Her uterus is a clown car. One that has hopefully been closed for business!

  20. The high road isn’t as instantly gratifying as being a raging bitch to people, but it works out much more satisfying in the end. Hope he can stick to it.

  21. Cock Dr

    She was paid millions and so was Jon in the end. There is no shortage of money.

  22. anonym

    get off that pedestal, and drive a fucking Toyota minivan to haul those 8 kids.

    Don’t buy a fucking audi, and maybe you won’t have financial troubles.

    Saving money is easy. Forcing yourself to develop that habit takes work.

    No one gives a shit about you, Kate. No one will notice you whether you drive a camry or an audi.

  23. Venom

    Is she a black NBA or NFL player underneath that skin because she has the financial commonsense and spending habits of one.

    What a jackass.

  24. Maeby

    She got the tummy tuck a long time ago for free. Jon is still a bitter asshat. What is he doing these days anyway? Can HE provide for 8 kids 24/7? The kids have two single parents on a single parents income. Good luck trying to live a decent life in a two bedroom apartment kids. Stop hating on this dumb bitch, she’s seriously concerned about her kids whereas jon just wants to see her fall for the fun of it.

    • CranAppleSnapple

      Yeah, I love the way he says “YOUR family” like it’s nothing to do with him.
      Those are your kids too, you scumbag.

    • ja

      Jon at the end learned his lesson and I think is working construction. If Kate is smart then the kids will be fine for the rest of their lives. I am glad that this show is ending because it has been a while since Kate has seen the light. I hope she will be more humble now on. I think the kids will have a hard time adjusting because camera crew has been with them since birth and Kate has to get over free stuff now. Kate should at least make amends with her brother.

  25. kimmykimkim

    Who would hire this bitch though? She’s as unhireable (is that a word?) as Casey Anthony. She should just leave the country, go to a place where people are lucky enough to not know who she is.

    • TomFrank

      I dunno. If I were running a daycare center, and I had to choose between Kate Gosselin and Casey Anthony to fill an opening, I’m pretty sure I’d hire Kate. She may not have experience with children unassisted, but at least no one’s died.

  26. lol...irony

    I’m fine with Jon seeming somewhat level headed and what not…but isn’t kind of weird to be lecturing your ex by saying:

    “Provide for your family.”

    When the “family” is also yours…lol…am I missing something?

    Even if I was divorced…if I ever uttered those words to my wife I’m not sure I’d get to see my kids again.

  27. kurgen99

    Time for a sex tape K8te!

  28. a short haired girl

    i’ve been waiting for this day for years. i admit that i used to watch the show early on, but the more abusive and fucking emasculating kate became towards jon on camera, the more i hated her and just i stopped watching. now if only other reality “stars’ would burn out just as fast as she is.

    • Lizzig

      I agree, I used to watch it and the way Kate used to talk to Jon make my skin crawl. I actually don’t blame him for having an affair. ( I will sit back and wait for the backlash). She was a horrible wife and having 2 nanny’s standing behind the camera caring for her kids doesnt show her as a great mum. People just need to stop hiring Kate, not buy any books she may write and not turn up to events where she is the ‘headliner’. Hopefully for those kids sakes she saves some of that money by firing all the staff and raising them on her own.

  29. Queef Sister

    I’ll give her $20 bucks to suck Jon’s dick. That will buy all eight of those brats 2 items from the dollar menu with enough change left to buy some Kool Aid.

  30. Mandy

    I am NOT a Kate Gosselin fan, but it’s kind of ridiculous to say “There’s lots of families with multiple kids and parents working normal jobs.” No matter how high of a promotion Kate gets in the nursing world, a nursing salary would never pay for a decent life for 8 kids. I’m not suggesting she stay in reality TV or anything like that (nor do I care what she does), but her nursing job would not provide well enough for her kids in my opinion.
    It’s also weird that he said “Provide for your family”, since it is his family too ..?

    • “a nursing salary would never pay for a decent life for 8 kids.” That is that bitches problem….the taxpayer didn’t sleep with her! She plowing through that money and will soon be flat on her ass….. Only a greedy sicktard would have 8 kids at once…..they thought they would be on easy street forever!

    • Funny, my brother-in-law is from a family of 8 kids that lived on a single income. They all survived quite nicely.

    • Jon and Kate Plus Hate

      Well then she needs to choose which children to put up for adoption…oh wait, that would be a really great reality show……

    • Marceelf

      Are you kidding? An RN can easily earn 75-100k working full time. Lots of big families can live on that. Of course, they aren’t driving Audi’s and Mommy is getting thousand dollar hair extensions but they are able to eat and live. I used to watch this show back when they were “normal”, and Kate was the coupon/bargain shopping queen. I wonder when the last time she did her own grocery shopping was. This is going to to put the “reality” back in her life.

    • Preesi

      Many take a look at the homes of all the OTHER sextuplets in the USA

      They all are living NORMALLY

    • Matthew

      It’s not too weird that he said that. I know plenty of people who have to hear from their ex’s that the kids are “theirs” when it comes to stuff like visitation or other serious decision. “You’re not taking MY kids here, You’re not doing this with MY kids…” so maybe it’s the same thing. Just a dig on her. “How you like that shit now, cunt! Provide for YOUR family, right?” Just sayin’.

      Anyhow, they’re not gonna go broke. As soon as some tabloid hears a soccer mom in a Kmart say “I wonder what happened to Kate and those cute little kids…” They’ll be on it like a stink on shit, and you KNOW she’ll agree to whore ‘em out for a few more interviews and a couple TV specials. She’ll get paid, so if anyone is worried about her, fear not. She’ll survive.

  31. zomgbie

    oh sure now he speaks up.
    its not like he has any balls left to lose.

  32. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
    Dude of Dudes
    Commented on this photo:

    Id make sweet love to the car. Hot anal buttsecks if it was an A5.

  33. What a retard

    So, kate gosselin is whining like a sissy about how she has no money & has to get a job, yet she bought a brand new expensive audi convertible midlifecrisismobile? I wonder if she even remotely understands how arrogant & delusional that makes her look…

  34. Queen of Everything

    Kate would have to consider herself LUCKY if she gets a job at all. Many ppl out of work these days. Jon at least took the high road and took a “real” job without bitching about it. Kate’s become very imperial and needs to give her head a shake here. She wanted all those kids & now she must provide for them. She may have to work 2 jobs but hey – you’re Super Mom (aren’t you Kate?)

  35. Pwnt. Time to stop being an enraged asshole, Kate.
    No one wants to see it anymore.

  36. Clown Shoes

    Hey bitch, where do the car seats go?

  37. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
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    I’m pretty sure if she sold this car and got a Kia instead, she could feed all those kids for a year.

  38. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
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    “So this is what it comes to. No more Whole Foods. Now I have to shop at Giant. Like a *peasant*.”

  39. forrest gump


  40. Reece

    I don’t know why Jon got such a bad rap. He was constantly berated on camera (which makes you wonder what we didnt see). They were admittedly split up when he started seeing other ppl (and thats after years of a sexless marriage), and he’s been paying child support for 8 children while his ex makes millions solely bc 8 children fell out of her black hole of a vagina.

    And a Audi sports car? really? If you want to get sympathy for having to work to provide for your children, get a more practical car.

  41. Mee Mee

    Hahaha! Party’s over betch.

  42. Satan

    She shouldn’t have had so many kids. She’s ruining the planet!

  43. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Jeebus, is she lactating again???

  44. Kate Gosselin Audi Jon Gosselin
    Cardinal Ximenez
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously… you’re gonna hate on someone for driving a $44,000 car? Seriously. Thats pretty average folks.

  45. Cardinal Ximenez

    Love the hate against her because she drives an Audi. Seriously folks, its a $44k vehicle. Same price as an AVERAGE SUV. Or should she drive the massive cargo van she has for the kids in to town to run errands? Of course you would castigate her for that because it wasn’t “green”. Philistines.

  46. Jinxy

    Aw, the poor bitch is worried about how she’s going to live, but just bought that sports car with cash a couple of days ago. She-hag is a liar, but she got another check out of People ragazine didn’t she?

  47. Chris

    I would like to see kate wearing diapers and rhumba pants.

    • Schmidtler

      yeah, me too, if what you mean by ‘wearing a diaper and rhumba pants’ is ‘strapped to a saturn rocket headed straight for the sun’.

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