Kanye West Probably Cheated On Kim Kardashian With Pia Mia

April 29th, 2014 // 49 Comments
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Posted by Photo Boy

Because bovine husbandry is hard work and it seems his prized cow is almost fully fattened for slaughter, Kanye West has set his sights on an assonant yearling outside of Satan’s herd.

Ever since Kanye West, 36, took Pia Mia under his wing, Kim Kardashian, 33, has reportedly been jealous of how closely he’s mentoring the young star. On April 24, Pia took to Instagram to claim that the trailer for The Other Woman is the “story of [her] life.”

So, this Pia Mia person is 17, which could be an even more serious problem for Kanye than just a cheating scandal if the source of the accusation wasn’t Hollywood Life, making it complete horseshit, and/or if his fiancee wasn’t a horrible, soulless husk of a human with only a thick buttmeat outer core keeping her from being sucked back into dark void from whence she came. A reality which could make anyone say, “Kanye had sex with a baby on live television, so he could go to jail and not ever have to marry Kim? Yeah, that sounds perfectly reasonable.”

Photo: Fame/Flynet, Getty, Splash News, WENN

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  1. bb

    as much as i would giggle about this being true. Kanye has showed us that he is an ass man. Kim’s and Amber rose before that. This girl isn’t enough for kanye

  2. I have no idea who she is but I’ll take her a million times over Kim.

  3. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She does look like a child here.

  4. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Did Kim look like that before the 8,000 cheeseburgers?

  5. Bonnie Oliff

    I don t like Kim, but your a slob. What kind of person r u. U just had a baby.

  6. MZ MIZRY

    tune in to e! channels kartrahian show next season to see the drama unfold!!

  7. Frank Burns

    Entertainment and sports figures are already responding to the scandal:
    Woody Allen: “I didn’t even know Kanye had adopted.”
    Roman Polanski: “Something probably fell in her drink and he was just trying to wake her up.”
    Bryan Singer: “Does she have a twin brother?”
    Jerry Sandusky: “My wife thinks he’s innocent too.”
    Donald Sterling: “She can be my guest at a Clippers game, but Kanye has to stay at home.”

    • Epic response, Frank!

    • Funny but if she’s 17, she’s legal in most states so as long as he banged her in those states, there’s no Woody Allen/Roman Polanski/Jerry Sandusky going on here.

      • Smith

        Oh good, the pedo-apologist is here. I bet you carry around a list of consent laws by state, and spend your weekends trolling high school football games, trying to convince girls (boys?) to cross state lines. No doubt you have some “kids are more mature these days, so consent age should be lowered to 14″ arguments you are eager to share. Sicko.

      • So by your rationale, in all the states where the legal age limit is 17 (which is most states), everyone there who has sex with a 17yo is a pedophile? You’re a fucking idiot.

      • To those under 35:
        Just a thought, especially for you blue-noses who think that fucking a 17 year old is pedophilia…Ask your parents how old they were when they lost their virginity. Take it from this old fuck, if it weren’t for 17 year old beauties, many people in my age group would never have had their cherries popped and YOU, in all likelihood, wouldn’t even be here.

  8. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh-oh… Zaloog’s not gonna approve.

  9. pik nak

    PLANTED B.S. STORY. Dude is gay. Nice try though, P.R.

  10. Greg

    So Kanye is into the Post-Opt Tranny look?

  11. So when she hits 18 years will he realize it was his kid?

  12. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Behold the private antidote for long term and very public monogamishness with Kim Kardashian.

  13. Hopefully all three will be killed by fire ants.

  14. Burt

    Tub-o-Lard to ice cream stick

  15. Meshugga Tits

    I thought Kim’s name on the Ray-J sex tape was “Pia Mia.”

  16. *sigh*
    America really likes to reward trashy whores.

  17. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Mike Walker
    Commented on this photo:

    She looks a bit like Hayden Pantytaters.

  18. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    I would tear that shit up….next year that is.

  19. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    That girl is literally half of Kim.

    And NOT a human toilet bowl.

  20. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Crazy8
    Commented on this photo:

    She is beautiful.

  21. Robb7

    Strange, little creature — but oh so preferable to that lard ass he’s been humping.

  22. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    She tucks her ears into her bandana. Zomgwtfbbq

  23. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Gu gu marino
    Commented on this photo:

    Well kanye is addicted to porn, so…

  24. Is she a man?

    If the answer is yes then Kanye banged her.
    If the answer is no then Kanye did not bang her.

  25. Pia Mia MTV Movie Awards
    Commented on this photo:

    Have been coming to this site for almost a decade because I love celeb trash but it’s now mostly about misogyny/hatred/negativity. Good luck to y’all.

  26. kery

    She is ugly and doesn’t look like a 17year old girl though…

  27. NukNuk

    Sure, Kayne likes ass, but maybe he likes chicken bone every once and a while.

  28. In Kanye’s defense, as a rapper, he’s going to be subconsciously drawn to women with rhyming names. This explains his previous dalliances with the likes of Angela Malangela, Gloria LeHoria and Zenyatta Mondatta.

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