In case you needed more proof that Kris Jenner‘s fangs produce a powerful mind control toxin, Kanye West agreed to perform at the wedding for a grandson of Kazakhstan president Nursultan Nazarbayev over the weekend, according to the New York Times:
According to the Kazakh news agency Tengrinews, Mr. West was a personal guest of Mr. Nazarbayev’s. The leader’s grandson, Aisultan Nazarbayev, 23, married Alima Boranbayeva, the daughter of a top executive at a Kazakh state energy firm. Phone calls to the Kazakh presidential administration and to Mr. West’s publicist in New York were not returned on Monday.
Mr. Nazarbayev has ruled Kazakhstan in an autocratic fashion since the fall of the Soviet Union, and was criticized for a brutal police crackdown against striking oil workers in the city of Zhanaozen in 2011 that left more than a dozen killed.
“Kanye, did you see how much money you made for one night? One night. Why even tour?”
“It’s all about the fans, Kris. Say, can I see my daughter now-”
“HISSSSSSSSSSSS! *bites Kanye in the neck* You will perform for Assad this weekend…”
“I will perform for Assad this weekend…”
“You will bring me back slaves…”
“I will bring you back slaves…”
“You will make love to me now…”
“I will make- wait, what? Bitch, your venom ain’t that strong. PEACE.”