Working For Kanye Is Exactly The Nightmare You Think It Is

“Does this look like a dude who likes fingers in his butt?”
“Nah, man. You look dope right now.”
“Dope for real?”
“For real.”

Everyone knows that Kanye West is an unabashed egomaniac. So much so, that he recently scared the shit out of Die Antwoord and those people look like what happened with the CIA tried to created a person made entirely of methamphetamine and tattoo ink. So it’s no surprise that Yeezy’s former employees probably have a shitload of crazy stories about working for him. What is surprising is that his bodyguard, former New York cop Steve Stanulis, either never had to sign a NDA, or did and doesn’t mind having his entire dick sued off, because holy shit, did he unload a pile of batshit here. Via The Sun:

“I’ve been employed by a lot of high-end people but I’ve never worked for someone like him. He’s ten times worse than what you see. You just never knew what would trigger a meltdown.”

Well, we’ve seen him scream at a guy in a wheelchair to stand the fuck up, and have a meltdown at SNL like a toddler at bedtime. And speaking of that last one, how did Stanulis say they manage to calm him down?

It was only when wife Kim, 35, came down from the audience to soothe him that the 38-year-old could bear to carry on with the show.

I’ll just get this out of the way, because we’re all thinking it:

Road Trip

So how much worse could it get? Way worse. All of the worse. Over the course of working for Kanye for a total of just 14 days, Stanulis witnessed Kanye tell people not to talk when he walks by, scream at another guard for touching him, drunkenly berate the security detail of an Italian dignitary, and become a sulky bitch when he was forced to ride in the front seat of a car. He was once told “Patterns distract him,” which sounds a lot like an instruction you’d give to a special education teacher. It’s a seriously great read, especially for the part where Stanulis is so traumatized by Kanye that he speaks glowingly about Kim Kardashian. I can’t imagine the special kind of mindfucking I would need to describe Kim Kardashian as anything other than the malignant tumor that metastasized into a viable Donald Trump candidacy, except I can and it’s having an argument in an elevator with Kanye about who is going to push the buttons. It’s amazing this man hasn’t had a thousand strokes.

Inside The Weird World Of Kanye West – The Sun

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