So Kai The Hitchhiking Hatchet Hero Allegedly Murdered An Attorney For Allegedly Raping Him

The Superficial | May 17, 2013 - 11:07 am

Should I really have included the autotune? Probably.

So remember Kai The Homeless Hitchhiking Hero who saved a woman’s life by beating a crazy man who thought he was Jesus in the head with a hatchet? He, uh, he may have taken his love of hatcheting skulls too far. Via Gawker:

Galfy was discovered beaten to death in his Clark, New Jersey, residence on Monday, and today police issued a warrant for [Caleb “Kai” Lawrence] McGillvary’s arrest. The 24-year-old drifter, who says he is not homeless but “home free,” was captured at a Greyhound bus station in Philadelphia.
According to Philadelphia’s NBC 10, authorities believe Galfy picked up McGillvary in Times Square Saturday night before taking him to his house. They also believe the two had a “sexual encounter.”

And by sexual encounter, Kai would have you to believe that was rape because he allegedly posted this to Facebook on Tuesday:

what would you do if you woke up with a groggy head, metallic taste in your mouth, in a strangers house… walked to the mirror and seen come dripping from the side of your face from your mouth, and started wretching, realizing that someone had drugged, raped, and blown their f*ckin load in you? what would you do?

Ha! Just like the day I hired Photo Boy. But, no, seriously, what would I do? Probably re-examine my life and all the choices that led me to this moment starting with eating a fistful of acid and going, “No, man, it’ll be more like home-free.” From there, hope to God the police – I’m sorry, “policy enforcers.” – will believe me and enforce some policies on this dude’s anus. But going on a killing spree works, too, I guess. And in your defense, you were already famous for saying, “Well, I’m the Anti-Christ!” to a man you hit in the head with a hatchet after he said he’s Jesus while trying to run a woman over. Society gave you no choice.