JWoww’s breasts turned away from clubs

April 9th, 2010 // 131 Comments

Apparently the cast of Jersey Shore is getting shot down at nightclubs while filming their second season in Miami, according to RadarOnline:

The cast is being denied access to some Miami hot spots that don’t want the trouble of dealing with all that accompanies their appearances.
“A lot of places in South Beach aren’t letting them in,” a source on the scene exclusively told RadarOnline.com.
“They’re not welcome at many, many spots, and they’re getting refused all over the place.”

You mean nightclubs are turning away kids with the names Snooki, The Situation and Fungi Guido which might not be one of their names but it should be? I just assumed they arrived at the clubs and the red phone went off at the White House. “Obama here. Pauly D? Yeah, he cool. But not that Orko-lookin’ bitch. Nah, you put her out back with some Reese’s Pieces on the ground. — Mo’fucker, do I sound like I’m playin’?!”

Sorry about that, I just wanted to prove I could write dialog for The Wire. (What now, David Simon?)


  1. josette

    They all look extra busted

  2. Maybe they could figure out how to let JUST her breasts in the club. Hmmm…

  3. TekMoney

    Stereotyping much? Sigh. Anyway, I wouldn’t turn JWoww away… sure her tits are horrible, but the rest of her looks pretty damn inviting. She can just keep that tube top on. ^_^

  4. Those wonderful boobs really ought to be allowed to go wherever they want. Preferably over to my house.

  5. Poptart

    Her face is offensive.

  6. Heidi

    Really Miammi is the spanish New Jersey. A ‘tool’ satellite city, all those weird cuban ex-pat offspring. Really no different from the weirdos in Jersey or Middle Eastern Guidos of Deerborne, Michigan. However Miami was once-not now a hot spot, but when Gianni died ect everyone just disappeared to Europe. Oh Well.

  7. Alex

    Haha that’s exactly how the trash girls are here in NJ… go to the gym and have a smoke the moment they step out the door.

  8. Chinny

    Let me get this straight: she works out in a tube top, despite her giant breasts and then smokes immediately after exercising?

    This girl is AWESOME!

  9. P911GT10C

    Workin out and then havin a butt.

    You stay classy Jwoww.

  10. Max Planck

    Fake boobs made of plastic.

    Fake New Jersey made in Florida.

    Fake people are genuine fake.

  11. Jen

    You know you have some fake ass tittays when you can work out in a tube top.

  12. Pernacchia

    Smokers suck!

  13. joho777

    Wow. So South Beach mightclubs DO have some taste. Amazing.

    It really says something when Bombshell McGee can get in, but JWOW can’t.

  14. Nick

    Exercise..water.. smoking… a picture of health!! Doesn’t that defeat the purpose of healthy?

  15. Harold^Sick

    The Wire FTW

  16. Letmyspiritpass

    Camel Alert = pic 16

  17. Nick

    The first season was funny.. Now they are just going to old and boring.. MTV should of stopped and got a different cast.. Like the real world.. Each time different people. Makes it alot more interesting. Well I guess the “Situation” will finally get some. Maybe not.

  18. nat

    I think it is hilarious she is working out in a tube top lol hizzo!!!!

  19. nat

    oh and with false eyelashes

  20. Dumb Ho

    Every club in the world throws the trash out, what’s the shock here?
    Trash is trash….

  21. captain america

    you wanna see me happy?
    …………..Pump Up The Volume!!

  22. Deacon Jones

    I disagree.

    Anyone with half a fucking brain on MTV’s staff should have foreseen them getting denied almost everywhere. Ever try to get into a club in South Beach? It’s like Vegas.

    Camel toe, pic BTW.

  23. Haywood Jablowmie

    That’s two camels worth of toe.

  24. Natalie

    Lol, this is such a photo-op. Who the heck works out while wearing a tube top? If you try to run, your boobs will fall out. Even flat chested girls know that.

  25. In the words of Hannibal Lector: Po white traaash.

    Actually, she’s a chain-smoking, dick-sucking, Guido-following whore, that’s what I meant.

  26. Shouldn’t be JWoww….

    Should be J-Cow

  27. you stay classy New Jersey

    They should really start letting them into clubs, that way another cast member can get punched in the face and all will be right with the world.

  28. pimp

    start doing porn already…whore…

  29. fearsarewishes

    Sweet Cadillac logo on her cell phone.

  30. Did you happen to see what her father looks like?

  31. You're nobody till somebody Rough you

    Present and future appearances by Snooki’s incessant trucker hat
    -during sleep
    -parent’s funeral
    -jail for providing alcohol to minors
    -the Grammys
    -wedding day
    -rearing lil nooks

  32. FaceFuck

    Who the fuck wears makeup to workout except a self absorbed cunt?

  33. Beeotch

    I want to know who the hell picked out these freaking names? They sound like they are muppets not people. JWoww….Snookie?

  34. Matt

    JWoww proves that you can bolt on big fake tits onto an otherwise average to below-average girl and men will get twitterpated over them.

  35. uigu


  36. TS

    Anyone who introduces themself as J-Woww deserves to get spit on right in the face on principal alone…

  37. abby

    I am with #12

  38. bar room hero

    what a slag…

    That shitty tattoo looks disgusting

  39. JR

    @23 seconded. It’s easy to think that because all the party types in Miami look trashy that the clubs will let just any idiot with a fake tan in, but they can be picky as hell. I’ve been turned away there before.

    …wait that puts me in the same league with the Jersey Shore kids, doesn’t it?

    I’m gonna go kill myself now.

  40. bob

    Us Miami/So-Be locals hate these stupid clown shoes, and for the most part, all New Yorkers and New Jersey natives.. Do these people know they are a joke? WE DON’T WANT GUIDO’S HERE!! We already have our Spanish Julio Stereotypes here.. Ugh..

  41. Gweb

    Why don’t they just call her JWWWhore?

  42. Ewww…everything about her is nasty. Her face is ugly as hell.

  43. marcus

    Who the fuck drinks red bull on the treadmill? She probably slammed a calzone right before her spin class.

  44. Jen

    why do these bitches have sunglasses on their heads, and hats n shit? wtf? thats a pussy ass work out if you wear sunglasses on your head. FATTIES.

  45. hateyoufornoreason

    Snooki looks like Roseanne Barr. I’d like to see Jillian take them through a workout and then take pictures of the makeup sliding off their faces, the fake eyelashes sticking to their sweaty foreheads, both of them crying like babies. No wonder they are both so fat if this is the workout.

  46. user123

    bahahahahahah! #37 got it bang on, lol!

    But ya this chick is actually like borderline NASTY. Fake eyelashes & tube top at the gym?? What a fucking joke! And the sad thing is she’s trying REALLY hard, and this is the best she can do. Fuck this world is fucked. And the fucking faggy guys on that show are so unbelievably pathetic, I wouldn’t even give any one of those guys the time of day if they were just normal guys in a bar. Tanning and eyebrow threading and being basically a completely vain arrogant metrosexual is the BIGGEST turn-off. Every time I see a guy in the tanning salon I laugh basically out loud at them. What a joke. REAL MEN DON’T GO IN TANNING BEDS. Nothing is sexier than a real MAN, (normal amount) body hair and all. I am 24 and have a secret fantasy to get fucking nailed by a sexy guy in his late 30s or 40s. There’s something really hot about that to me, mainly cuz you’d be fucking a man, not an immature “boy”……. Makes me wet just thinking about….lol, anyway, you get my point. :P

    • Ross P.

      I am a 37 year old professional with children and a wife. Tanning has nothing to do with being a ‘Guido’. I am 7th or 8th generation American with German, Polish, Scots-Irish, Portuguese and Alsatian-French blood – that makes me American. Nothing to do with Guido. I tan as safely as possible and I look great. Real men don’t tan? That’s an awful attitute.

  47. LolleyGagger

    Bullshit those places let anyone in, I smell pub stunt.


  48. n

    1. JWoww has also had JWowtummytuck.
    2. Classy lightin’ a cig seconds out of the gym door.
    3. If these asses joined my gym…I’d cancel my membership.
    4. idiots.

  49. colt13

    Don’t care for the cigs, but love the bolt ons.

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