JWoww: ‘I Was Under Anesthesia in Nude Photos’

January 10th, 2011 // 47 Comments

Nude photos of Jersey Shore’s JWoww are in the hands of her former manager/ex-boyfriend which reportedly show the reality star before she became the stunning creature she is now. Her lawyers have been fighting to keep the pics unpublished, and now she’s decided to claim she was under anesthesia when they were taken which is women’s excuse for everything these days. RadarOnline reports:

What a joke! How are you under anesthesia when you are standing up posing for the pictures?,” Lippolis said to RadarOnline.com.
“They had not given her anesthesia when I took the pictures, she was actually standing up with her hands on her hips looking right at me.”
…. “The pictures were taken more than an hour before she even went in,” Tom told RadarOnline.com in the new interview. “She told me, ‘Take two pictures of me, one from the front and one from behind then we’ll take them after.”

Obviously we’ll know who’s telling the truth when the pictures are ultimately released and she’s drooling over the side of a wheelchair – *crosses fingers* – but I hope JWoww isn’t thinking this new anesthesia angle is going to somehow make people want to look at the pics any less. This is the Internet we’re talking about. 78 million people watched a video of a little kid after a trip to the dentist and Kim Kardashian was the most Googled celebrity two years running. We’ve got issues. Deep psychological issues. Case in point:

There’s literally no excuse for that. None.

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. Sonny the Cuckoo Bird

    Don’t attribute to anesthesia that which can be explained by stupidity.

  2. is cocaine an anesthesia now?

  3. Jennifer

    Nobody is going to believe this excuse since it’s common knowledge she will go totally nude for a soda and half-eaten Snicker’s bar.

    • Nobody is going to believe this because it’s fucking retarded. There’s nothing wrong with having a boyfriend snap some “before” pics of your boobs, he’s a bit of a jerk for trying to sell them…so just say THAT. Lying about something that doesn’t have any reason to lie about tells me she’s either pathological, or just fucking stupid.

      • Mortimer Duke

        I vote fucking stupid.

      • fap

        I vote don’t care, this is what you get for trying to milk the public dollar.

      • Okay, McFeely, you are typically smarter than this. Seriously, the ex has already gone on record stating he is NOT shopping the photos around.

        He is suing her for unpaid managerial costs. Her team spun this up to make her more famous for being a cock-munching whore. Not that the ex isn’t probably a certifiable moron, because, well, look at his record. But still. He isn’t selling the photos

      • So lemme see, the owner of the photos is suing JWOWW for managerial costs and all of a sudden he’s waving photos of her naked around? C’mon man how naive are ya? Leverage. Pay my demands or I release the photos. Either way he gets paid. Of course he’s not selling them. Noooooo.

  4. Richard McBeef

    I can’t tell if she is not half bad or it’s some sort of illusion due to her proximity to that sawed off pug costar.

  5. joho777

    Jwow: “I was under anathesia (read: stoned) when those photos were taken.”

    “Be glad that the photos weren’t taken while I was turning tricks, you would of REALLY been disgusted!”

    “I didn’t buy those plastic tits just so I could stand in line with the housewives at the grocery store. They’ve made a lot of money for me.”

  6. uncle phil

    since when is a handle of vodka refered to as anesthesia?

  7. Bobby

    She should be for the nude photos. Hell, take more.

    If anything, the nude photos are going to make her career go up. Just look at Paris Hilton.

  8. ihateMTV

    i will give her Stylist this much….whoever she has hired has REALLY cleaned up her look a LOT. she actually looks CLASSY in those pics! then she does something stupid like give the camera the bird.

    • You cand ress a skank up, put make up on her, hang designer clothes on her, perform plastic surgery, have her work out 7 days a week …

      But deep down inside, she’s still a skank. A hot skank, but a classless skank nonetheless.

  9. J-Woww
    Mortimer Duke
    Commented on this photo:

    This picture is killing me softly.

  10. ihateemo

    Anesthesia? Given the combination of vodka tonics and rohypnol that’s undoubtedly been through her system I’m amazed she doesn’t have a built in tolerance.

  11. Colin

    Wow, she actually looks cute when she’s not painted orange.

  12. lightdragon

    she almost looks like that girl from “The Vampire Diaries” Nina Do-something. So my next guess is that she will say she was magically forced to say that because a vampire made her.

  13. GravyLeg

    Actually, she is numb from the neck up 24/7…

  14. So the picts were taken during her implant operation? Do we really want to see that?

  15. yuck

    that ring is fucking ugly…

  16. Okay anyone else creeped out by the ‘human eyed’ Elmo? Looks fucking possessed!!!

  17. jlowejd5

    People who believe JWoww knows the word “anesthesia” are the same people who believe that…no, wait. Nobody’s that stupid.

  18. Mandy

    She’s actually very pretty. I wish she would tone down the fake tanner. She kind of looks like Nina Dobrev (in these photos, at least)

  19. Sasha

    Good one skank!

  20. J-Woww
    Commented on this photo:

    What an asshole this bitch is, and what is with the white Don King?

  21. Fritz

    Drugs or no drugs she still sucks at fighting…

  22. So, since when is it illegal to get a girl doped up to take some beaver shots. This ain’t Nazi, Russia. Read your history!

  23. Flip

    She’s really pretty in pictures….. but not so much when she opens her mouth and starts speaking.

  24. Kodos

    Didn’t Linda Lovelace try this defense when she tried to explain away all the cocks she sucked? **FAIL**

  25. SmartPotato

    AUUUUGH! LEARN TO USE THE STRIKE-THROUGH CORRECTLY!

    “stunning” is NOT struck-through, when doing tongue in cheek.

    Here is how to use it correctly:

    When she became the stunning creature [strike-through "CREATURE"] then provide a sub word that is nicer: “vixen” or “model” for example.

    GEESH!

  26. SmartPotato

    Here’s another example:

    Strike-through “whiskey” or “heroin”, THEN put the word that actually came out of her mouth (“anesthesia”).

    GEESH!

  27. Not a fan

    Why is this thing famous? For being a drunk and stupid? My 40 year old sister looks better then her.

  28. Reggie Rhino

    More likely the boyfriend was under anesthesia while taking the nude photos.

  29. poopsmith

    this shit is really sad and pathetic though, these kind of people need therapy not limelight.

  30. J-Woww
    PlasticSurgeryRules
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah she also looks like she finally discovered Botox (around eyes and between eyebrows – ***bet she can’t knit her eyebrows if you ask her!!***) and restylane or juvederm for laugh lines or nasolabial folds.

  31. J-Woww
    PlasticSurgeryRules
    Commented on this photo:

    Much better (more tasteful) choice in earrings..she all too often was caught rockin huge tacky fluorescent pink hoop earrings and things of that nature.

  32. J-Woww
    PlasticSurgeryRules
    Commented on this photo:

    Oh wait. It may be because she has that behemoth distraction of a ‘ring’ on her hand (she seems to be promoting or heavily attempting to show it off-and built her whole purple outfit around wearing that eye sore)

  33. GravyLeg

    I believe her. I saw the pictures and now my dick is numb.

  34. J-Woww
    noellia
    Commented on this photo:

    I love Jwoww, she is hardcore and doesn’t put up with anyone’s shiz.
    Much love from the shores of SYDNEY AUS.

  35. karthi

    wow

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