Here’s JWoww promoting her new fragrance at Kmart yesterday, and I honestly don’t know what else to add here because this is basically the equivalent of stumbling upon a dead deer while out hunting. There’s just no sport in it. (Hunters try to poke dead deer in the boobs with a stick, right? Okay, good. That’s what I thought.)
Photos: Flynet, INFdaily, Splash News
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Everything about this is depressing.
derp
“promoting her new fragrance at Kmart”
That’s all you really needed to say.
no, the fragrance is important too. they actually bottled the smell of rotting sperm. they scraped her vag on a daily basis and then they patented the smell. the bottle is shaped like a dildo and the fragrance is called “skank”. The Situation has the same fragrance but they took the scrapings from his ass.
I’m with you, Georgio. At Kmart; god, that’s just priceless.
And what is the name of this stench, oops, I mean scent? “Oue di gutter slut”? “Whores r’ us”?
Eau de Whore
That crap will be sold at the flea market. It’ll be taped to an old crt RCA tv as a package deal.Some turd wearing acid washed green jeans with racing stripes down the side will negotiate OBO!
I didn’t know chlamydia had a scent that could be marketed.
It does, it’s kind of a burnt marshmallow scent. You can smell it as soon as you lift the hood up and get your head down there.
if it was called “ANUS” i would buy it.
She told me I was smelling the s’mores! Last time I hook up on a camping trip.
Eau de Skank.
Okay people, get to it, answer this – “JWoww’s perfume smells like . . . “
Jersey. Ass. … Jersey ass.
Coco butter tanning lotion and sweaty fist pumping guido ass.
who the hell is going to want to spray on that shit?
Cigarettes, vagisil, litter box and tuna, with a twist of regret.
Wow kimmykimkim, I was thinking the same thing.
Frommondah Cheese
The chemical munitions used against the Canadians during the Second Battle of Ypres.
….a combination of sweat, anger, and shame.
So standard sex, then.
I always wondered what used pussy and 3 loads of day old cum smelled like, Now I can Kmart and buy it.
Can the skank even break a smile or did she already botox the f-ck out of her face ? The closest thing she has to a smile is like Rosie O’Donnell with the smile that looks like a painful frown.
Pay Per view, who can smile first? Vicky Beckham or JWow?
I’m sure it’s an intoxicating mix of cheap men’s cologne, B.O., and herpes.
You can see it in her eyes… Dead inside, already hating herself. If only the rest of the team would follow and leave the rest of us alone.
a combination of smoke, vomit, bad breath, herpes, with a hint of pine.
I’m sure it’s an intoxicating mix of lilac and yeast infection.
I’m sure it’s an intoxicating mix of rosemary, Lysol, and Snooki.
Come oh JWoww. Cry little baby, CRY! Say it, Kmart. the only place for White trash and hookers. I know you’re sad and lonely….
Who forgot to flush?
People would pay to smell like cooter?
I can’t make it out — is it Odie Ho?
I’m sure it’s an intoxicating mix of Certs, urinal cake, and despair.
lol
+1
Very well done.
There’s a small but very important distinction between “fragrance” and “odor.”
More of an “odor” than a “fragrance.”
lol
Lemony RAID
discover the refreshing scents of summer sales day checkout lines at kmart.
Cheap liquor, tanning spray, and remorse.
I bet it smells like a fraternity house the next morning after a two kegger.
You know that scene.
Your feet make a peeling noise every time you take a foot step across the beer soaked wood and linoleum. There’s about 100 red Silo cups laying around, filled with various amounts of beer, standing on a plywood beer png table. 30% of them have cigarette butts in them, that have unpealed, sunk and now have a dark brown stain drifting out of them within the beer. There’s a broken bottle of Goldschlager in the corner. The house dog is walking through the broken glass, trying to paw out from under the couch a thing of lipstick some sorority whore dropped before she hiccuped her way upstairs.
Wait a second, where was I?
the worse was the next morning when you got a wiff of your jeans that had inevitably soaked up the frat juice from the floor the night before. they were all crusted on the bottom and make you want to vomit even more than you already needed to from the everclear hangover.
You were the guy with your pants around your ankles and the beer bong sticking out of your ass. also filled with cigarette butts.
So that’s where my lipstick was.
Maybe once or twice, Rich!
And yes, the “crusties” as we call them, the only thing that motivated me to wash my jeans in college.
Bianca, you bad girl! I have a feeling we wouldve hit it off!
I remember getting drunk for the first time on Mad Dog 20/20 Strawberry Banana (Don’t ask why) at the frat house and throwing up behind a huge rolled up carpet. Not good times…
Goldschlager in college? Fancy. lol
Mad Dog was our initiation night. That and Rumpleminz (or however the fuck its spelled)
I think it’s just called “ASS”
Smells like Guidette spirit.
Scent of a Whore
The package says ‘eau de toilette’ and it’s completely literal.
Unfuckingbelievable. WHO would want to smell like this moron?
Oh, other morons.
Eau de Stank?
Eau de Stanque
K-mart and JWoww team up to bottle a fragrance that smells exactly like roller hot dogs and stale popcorn. Only in America.
The smell emanating from a shopping mall movie multiplex? That’s actually a little enticing. I might buy that just to huff it at home.
“Promoting her fragrance at K-mart” sounds like a euphemism for farting in the checkout line.
What the hell did she do to her face? It just looks so awful now. She was a skank but she was not bad looking before.
Smells like Pledge, Salami, Bubblicious, and the dried ink from a Bankruptcy filing.
Robert, I just cackled at that one. Thanks
After I pay at the register and on my way out, she will be standing emotionless until I put a quarter between her fake tits, and my 3 year old son on her shoulders.
Then she will shake up and down for his entertainment for 30 seconds.
Who needs an ICEE?
How the hell do you package the smell of sweaty $10 streetwalker vag and keep it fresh?
Maybe it comes with a mouthwash companion, like “Listerdouche” or something.
If you want a free sample just go to any lobster pound in Maine and inhale deeply.
I’d fuck that but my dick would fall off a few hours later and I can’t have that as I have future needs and uses for it;
I’m sure she does have a fragrance, just not sure if it’s one we want to buy.
Eau de Putain.
Does the fragrance,come w/a free bottle of vaginal itch cream..
Eau de Humanity!
ROFL!
Bows down. (Respectfully, not in a kinky way)
Tons of that shit will be in the center aisles of Ross and TJ Maxx by the end of January.
Remember Twism by Shaq?!! LOL!
OMFG!!!!
This is actually quite the achievement for such a skankho!
That is one busted face
BTW, I should rally dig this chick because I am from the Bronx, but those fake tits and busted face are just two way over the top for me.
It was a logical step. How easy is ir to re-create the smell of cheao perfume? Very, i bet.
Yeah… it’s called “P-U”.
Or possibly: “Eu De Skank.”
Thanks to JWoww and KMart, now you too can smell like the inside of the BangBus.
Fragrance? More like odor. Bronzer and dried up cum?