Justin Timberlake Called Madonna ‘My Ninja’ On Twitter, Is In Some Shit

August 18th, 2014 // 35 Comments
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To celebrate the ancient day when dark forces penetrated this realm, manifesting themselves into the physical form we now know as Madonna, mortal slave to the bone hands, Justin Timberlake took to Twitter where he proclaimed the following message to all the land. Via ONTD:

A HAPPIEST of Bdays to my mother chucking ninja, @Madonna!! Hope you have a great one, M!

In Justin Timberlake’s defense, Madonna does have a history of using words she has no business using no matter how many black children she steals from African villages – I’m sorry, “adopts.” – so I can understand if he was trying to speak to her in her own language. The important thing is he deleted the tweet and hopefully stuck to just reciting passages from the Necronomicon. For example, my personal favorite:

“N’gai, n’gha’ghaa, bugg-shoggog, y’hah;
Yog-Sothoth, Yog-Sothoth.”

I don’t know what that means, but I just watched all time and space transform itself into a giant squid and demand human sacrifice, so there’s no way she won’t love that. It’s the simple gifts.

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  1. Eventually, every poseur out there will end up talking like a Juggalos.
    They usually both have the same level of intelligence, so no big surprise there…

  2. Rico Jones

    Can’t even use the word ninja now. We are becoming too politically correct. We need to stop with the white fucking guilt. I never owned any slaves.

    • Harriscandoit

      WTF I am going to have to update my white people dictionary again. Can’t use Ninja anymore? Sigh, you know this is starting to get confusing can we get a hit on twitter or something when us whities or crackers, or white devils, snow cones or Gaijins (Not just the Japanese that call us walking corpses that term now) can’t use a word that is turned racist. Because we can’t use demeaning language that would be mean. This is actually a funny topic among since I am the only white guy there. They call me anything they want and watch my brain overheat as I try to respond back not using a word that I am not supposed to use lol. Ninja was my back up man. All I have left is Asshole, shit head and screw you.

  3. The Brown Streak

    Wait a minute…Can someone do a side by side of Madonna and Groot?

  4. JC

    Why all the upset? He was trying to type Nilaihah, fallen angel and demon of occult sciences, but damn autocorrect changed it.

  5. Joe Black

    Should have called her a ho or bitch. Also any 4 legged animal reference that implies having sex with any available other 4 legged creature of the canine species. Why do you think they refer themselves as dog? dogginhg a bitch. fuck anything and run. No? A Dog or a bitch. Animals that shit outside lay down anywhere when they are tired lick themselves, etc. That’s okay to call someone Justin. Wake up.

  6. Am I still allowed to use my ninja-shaped cookie cutters?

    • Anita Berber's Addictions

      You can find yours? Mine tend to disappear and show up when I least expect them.

      Next: Is Madonna still alive?

  7. Sad state

    My god our society if in a terrible fucking place if he is in trouble for saying that, and the writter of this website is a complete scumbag for promoting that type of thinking

    • Liberals like the Fish writer have a perpetual need to be outraged about dumb shit like this. They do it to convince everyone (including themselves) about how tolerant they are.

      • For the record, while I do soapbox on some shit, 99% of the time I’m just reporting the “outrage” because that’s my job. Covering the ridiculous shit that’s happening to celebrities. In this case, getting ripped apart on Twitter – whether overblown or not – because they think they can walk around using street slang even though they live in million dollar mansions and were in the goddamn Mickey Mouse Club. I’m not creating the outrage, it’s already out there. And has been for a while by the time I get to it because my couch is soft. To me, it’s mainly just hilarious in the sense of how obliviously out of touch these people are. Like Bieber singing nigger.

      • Anita Berber's Addictions

        I object to the last sentence – Bieber “sings”? Are you serious?

  8. Shanannigan

    Throughout history the dumbest, and most destructive people in society have always attempted to limit language and ban words.

  9. Madonna might very well be a ninja. What is the problem?

  10. Ok, somebody explain it to me: what is supposedly offensive about “ninja,” and precisely who is pretending to be offended? Because I just saw a Vanilla Ice commercial which should be…well, all the more offensive if there is anything to this.

    • Shanannigan

      Because it’s a play on “nigga” I’m assuming. Now excuse, I have to pack before the PC police show up and take me for using a “non-whitey” word.

    • “Ninja” is a euphemism for the offensive word for black people “ni**a” or “ni**er.”

      • Thanks. But for god’s sake, in reality, no — it is not. Just because a group of idiots decide a thing is so does not mean that it actually is.

      • Obviously a word can have more than one meaning. In THIS context, as a slang expression, the word is being used as a euphemism. And while some black people feel that changing the ending of the original racial slur from “er” to “a” somehow makes it less offensive coming from another black person, others disagree and find it offensive regardless of how the original slur is spelled or the race of the person saying it.

      • I lived in Japan for two years. No way I am going to not call people ninjas because some idiot faction has decided this this is what it means. Fuck people.

      • Kay

        Don’t let this thread make you believe that all black people use that slang or use ANY slang for that matter. There are PLENTY of black people who did not know about the slang use of ninja nor were they upset with what JT said. Not all people are closed minded like that…Not that you can tell by some of the comments posted here.

      • Kay, you’re absolutely right. But conflict, whether real or generated by media hype, is entertaining to the general public.

  11. Hmm

    This is irrelevant, I thought it was already established a long time ago that Justin Timberlake was an honorary black man?

  12. terry

    Justin’s entire career revolves around him using black everything.

  13. When I hear the word Ninja, what first comes to mind is an image of Chris Farley.

  14. I can’t believe that people are getting their bowels in such an uproar over WORDS! What ever happened to “Sticks and stones may break my bones…and the dish ran away with the spoon.”

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