Justin Bieber’s Mom Hates Him

January 21st, 2011 // 58 Comments

Justin Bieber‘s mom manages his entire career. Which is why it’s no surprise that after being caught on a private yacht with Selena Gomez, he’s been forced to introduce cartoon movies at the Golden Globes and star in PETA ads about saving puppies. At this point, she might as well send him to public school in lederhosen and Huggies Pull-ups and lock this virginity thing down. “Moms says I have trouble holding it, so it’s usually best not to argue. So you wanna get milkshakes and hold hands later? *KKZZZZZZKZKKZZZ* OH MY GOD IT’S SHOCKING ME! IT’S SHOCKING ME SO HARD! MOM! MOM, I’M SORRY!”

Photos: Getty, PETA


  1. Especially if served properly.

  2. Hugh Gentry

    I wish I could bang his mom. She’s sooooo hot!!!

  3. Mom

    Justin, sweetie, you’re not allowed to cum in anybody’s mouth except mine.

  4. Hey Mrs. Bieber, line starts behind me.

  5. sfskdhoidfh

    He actually looks really hot in these pictures. I am 22 years old and even I’m like damn, is that Justin Bieber?

  6. Britney Spears

    I’d fuck the homo clear out of him.

  7. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m 16; I see NOTHING hot about him whatsoever. What an unappealing little twerp.

  8. His mom is in pic #2

  9. Beibers Mom is just jealous the love of her life is interested in other girls now. She’s trying to raise her little lesbian look-a-like son to love her and ONLY HER DAMN IT!!! He’s from Stratford Ontario, the whole Hamlet thing fits perfectly!!!

  10. 1hguoreht

    I always wanted to hear a “mama don’t preach” revision…

  11. GravyLeg

    Something tells me the animal that makes him smile the most is a sheep caught in a fence.

  12. steve

    I feel bad for Michael Jackson, dying so young. He would have traded his top 10 boys for just one night pounding a drugged up Bieber.

  13. whiskeyafternoon

    Wait, doesn’t he have a dead animal on his head? how can he be in an ad for PETA?

  14. Zac Efron

    When I think of the Beebs, I always end up ripping one of those “hot” farts.

  15. Are these the same animals PETA was caught “adopting” from shelters when cameras were rolling, then euthanizing and dumping in dumpsters late at night?

    Come to think of it, that’s a great plan for dealing with Bieber too.

    • sfskdhoidfh

      And what do you think happens to the animals in shelters? I hope they at least picked out the ugly/old/sick ones they knew would never be adopted

      • I used to think they euthanized them with as much care and compassion as was possible. Now I know that PETA comes buy and “adopts” them for a cheap photo op, then clubs them to death in the parking lot and tosses the corpses away like so much rancid garbage.

        Kind of like Ted Kennedy with hookers.

  16. Kevin

    Are there still parents out there that are not aware of how teen stars turn out? You get these kids in the spotlight and give them fame and more money than they know what to do with and then they are suprised when they have sex and do drugs? Oh let me guess…your kids are “different,” they would never do something like that.

  17. ick-abod

    I’d prob bang that chick.

  18. Justin Bieber
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    His corporate masters must wax him all over. He looks as smooth as an egg.

  19. nooooooooo

    The full line was originally “Animals can make you smile but they can’t make Nintendo hand over the Mario tune to asshat children like the one pictured.”

    I fear for this kid having any more fame, I can’t go anywhere without some retard screaming about him on a magazine or tv.

  20. gfdsdfs

    i wonder if his mom likes black men as much as he does?

  21. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    That photo of him and his mom looks photoshopped – his face looks all squished.

  22. cc

    He can do a lot better than Selena Gomez. If I was him, I’d sneak of to Sweden or Finland and have a threesome with 15 year old blondes, except by ‘threesome’ I mean ‘dozensome’.

  23. Ali

    Who doesn’t hate Justin Bieber? Though I gotta admit, his mother is far too kind. If I were his mother I wouldn’t even have had him in the first place. Then again I’m not a religious psycho who wants to brainwash little girls with terrible music from a boy who could quite possibly be a girl.

  24. …especially gerbils, huh?

  25. wim

    I must tell BeeWeeBieber himself: HIS MOM ISN’T THE ONLY ONE…………

  26. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:


  27. Anya

    who the fuck is this little nerd? I see his dorky face plastered all over gossip blogs but have yet to hear one of his songs. Fucking tool looks like his 10.

  28. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sorry, I think this kid is ridiculous but when did he get this haircut? Because IT LOOKS AWESOME ON HIM. If he looked like this all the time I would almost understand why little girls want him to pee in their buttholes (like everyone’s hero Kim Kardashian yay!).

  29. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    I saw cleavage, now I’m mellllllting……

  30. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    bahahhaa i wouldn’t blame her

  31. Justin Bieber looks like a LESBIAN!

  32. Aussie Mama

    Please Bieb’s stay normal, talented, kind and gorgeous.
    Mum, stay close to him, it’ll deter all the pedo’s in the industry.
    He is just lovely. Perfect.

  33. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    He’s going to grow into such a beautiful woman.

  34. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    demasiado guapo!!

  35. Aussie Mama

    Who’s Randal?

  36. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    His mom looks thrilled to be there!

  37. Borat Sagdiyev

    Jagshemash! My name a Borat. This young woman’s vagine hang like a sleeve of wizards robe.

  38. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m sorry but Justin Bieber is just ugly

  39. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    i love Justin bieber my room is filled with his posters and i have a book of him i have a lots of things of him

  40. Justin Bieber
    Commented on this photo:

    he is not smiling smile justin we all love you

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