Justin Bieber Takes Selena Gomez on Dates With Chris Brown

May 25th, 2011 // 50 Comments

“Babe, she looked at his cellphone. Is this going to be a thing? Are you gonna make this a thing? You’re making this a thing.”

Like most of us at 17, Justin Bieber is still learning the ropes of having a girlfriend and figuring out things to do to kill time between dry-humpings. Except while some of us made mistakes like forcing our girlfriends to watch us play Goldeneye for three hours, Justin decided taking Selena Gomez to the movies with Chris Brown and Demi Lovato would be a great idea. Hollywood Life reports:

“Barely anybody bothered them. One girl approached Selena and said she was a ‘Wizards of Waverly Place’ fan. Selena smiled and took a picture with her,” explains another onlooker. “It didn’t look like any of them even had bodyguards.”
“Everyone in the theater couldn’t believe they were all here together. It was so surreal, and a little random. They were all jumping up and down around each other like kids. Selena and Demi were especially affectionate with each other. They all looked really to be hanging out together. If you didn’t recognize them you’d think they were a bunch of regular high schoolers,” explains our fourth eyewitness.

I like how Hollywood Life basically implied Demi and Selena were making out, yet conveniently forgot to mention what Chris and Justin were doing. Because, what, an interracial gay couple is something to be ashamed of? That’s racism (ignoring the Latino lesbian stuff). Racism! *calls up Cannes* Forget Lars von Trier. I’ve found your real Hitler…

Photo: Bauer-Griffin, Splash News

superficial

  1. Damn, where is the pic of Demi Lovato. I wouldn’t mind see that little tight fit ass again.

  2. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    StayPuftOverlord
    Commented on this photo:

    Is that Cesar MIlan looking towards Selen aGomez?

  3. StayPuftOverlord

    “Everyone in the theater couldn’t believe they were all here together. It was so surreal, and a little random. They were all jumping up and down around each other like kids. Selena and Demi were especially affectionate with each other.”

    Ummmm everyone realizes Chris Brown is NOT 17 years old right……and how is this not creepy? It’s like one of them brought their older brother that punches everyone in the face…but it’s okay……cause he has downs and can’t help himself.

  4. Jon Hex

    “Selena and Demi were especially affectionate with each other,” says eyewitness ignoring Chris Brown holding upraised chair. “It was totes non-coerced.”

  5. cc

    Do you think he’s learned to pull her hair yet?

    In other news, I read he made $53 million last year. * puts revolver in mouth *

  6. The Critical Crassness

    Another fictional account of a supposed outing, by a pretend couple….yeah that works….Oh and Brad and Angelina are so over….Hollywood Life’s staff must do more drugs collectively than any journalistic staff in America. If Demi and Chris were there…WTF are the photos of them, especially the ones of Selena and Demi being especially affectionate with each other? Now that would be a newsworthy story!

  7. kara

    read before you post fish, you’re missing some words in there.

  8. Dan

    Doesn’t she look so happy!

  9. Chris

    Taking your girlfriend out with a woman abusing scumbag like Chris Brown is a terrible idea.

  10. Marley

    You know this is fake because a young girl approached Selena Gomez for a picture and not Justin Bieber. We all know that he is the only reason young girls live. FAIL.

  11. Venom

    Eventually some A list actor MAN is going to notice that Selena is a super hot piece of ass and go after her and she is going to dump this midget clown for said dude and Bieber and Beater Brown can spend the rest of their lives in bliss blowing each other.

    I mean come on this little turd is clearly gay. No straight man would ever sell nail polish and women’s cologne under their name.

    • David

      ya i would never let some one give me bags full of money to use my name to sell stuff, especially not at the wise age of 17. Hes gotta be gay

      • Venom

        Every other male celeb has made it just fine without putting their name on nail polish or perfume, even the gay ones, so yeah, he is queer.

    • TomFrank

      Yeah, of all the boy celebrities/heartthrobs who make $53 million when they’re 16, only one has put his name on nail polish. One out of one.

      • Eddy

        If he made 53 million by age 16 was it really necessary to sacrifice his, otherwise doubtful, manhood for a some million more by putting his name on female products?
        Why not on male products? Oooohhh right, because no man in his right senses would buy a cologne with that sissy face on it.

  12. Ed

    Gotta hand it to JB. Bringing Chris Brown on a date is a sure fire way to get your girl holding your arm the whole time to feel safe. It’s genius.

  13. Jimbo

    I hope the Biebs got some good bitch slapping tips from Chris…

  14. AlexK

    I just pray she wakes up and comes to her senses before this little tard thinks it’s a good idea to propose to her and start fathering little sissy boy offspring.

  15. horny pig

    I wish someone would just kick the living shit out of this little fucktard.. Someone hear my prayer ..

  16. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    fapappy
    Commented on this photo:

    Great training method Beebs, you just came up a notch in the “Bitch wheres my sandwich?” category.

  17. Mr Obvious

    She’s got that “why won’t he touch my breasts” look.

  18. old man

    I know I am getting old because the first thing I thought of when I looked at pic one was: Man that long hair would clog up the bathroom sink fast.

  19. 100 bucks bieber’s in a lucky pierre/french sandwich right now

  20. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Hard to say which one has the more delicate & feminine profile.

  21. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Cock Dr
    Commented on this photo:

    Was having difficulty determining which is the girl.
    Am gonna say it’s the pixie dyke in the camo skirt.

    • Kelsey

      ok seriously if justin was just a regular 17 yr old boy in high school with his girlfriend now one would hate on them..no one would call him gay bc hes not..no one would call him a girl bc hes not…ur all just jealous that he made it and you didnt…stop hating

  22. Amominous

    Too bad Chris Brown only likes beating up women. Can someone call Brown and tell him Bieber is to Selena as Ken is to Barbie in the genitalia department? Is that close enough?

  23. Arzach

    -”Don’t worry babe, he only hits Rihanna”-

  24. Sin

    Just shows how stupid Bieber really is. Selena and Demi have been friends for years so them being close is nothing new.

  25. the captain

    don’t let them fool ya: HE STILL LOVES IT TO PLAY WITH BARBIES!!

  26. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    one legged
    Commented on this photo:

    cocaine hats are so basic

  27. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    viper123
    Commented on this photo:

    at least there happy so every1 should get the f ova it

  28. Laquisha

    Please teach the rest of these internet hlooaigns how to write and research!

  29. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Ambar Ayerra
    Commented on this photo:

    Hes not wearing a skirt its shorts and he graduated already from high school.

  30. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Oliver161
    Commented on this photo:

    theres nothing wrong with the age difference either my brother is 21 and dating a 23 year old and shes having a baby :) theres absolutly nothing wrong with them two either :)

  31. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Commented on this photo:

    in the photos selena only looked at justin one time so father

  32. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Commented on this photo:

    she looks like she has been crying

  33. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    justinbeiberisUGLY
    Commented on this photo:

    CAMERAMAN-”Selena, is it true that you made Justin horny?”
    SELENA-”Yes”
    CAMERAMAN-”Did you and Justin have sex?”
    SELENA-”Yes”

  34. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    V
    Commented on this photo:

    They are a perfect couple ever. They are both so ugly, the just belong together.

  35. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    NINA
    Commented on this photo:

    THEY LOVE SEX WHY IS THAT HE IS 18 SHE IS 22 22+18= 40 I

  36. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    veronica
    Commented on this photo:

    love him

  37. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    HILARY
    Commented on this photo:

    THEY SO CUTE TOGETHERE HILARY

  38. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    np
    Commented on this photo:

    ikr

  39. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    np
    Commented on this photo:

    but not selena gomez she pretty jb punk azz

  40. Justin Bieber Selena Gomez Chris Brown
    Sapphire Radeon HD 7990
    Commented on this photo:

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