Selena Gomez Might Snitch On The Most Sizzup Drinkin’, Dick Textin’, Snow Pissin’ Wild Kid Eva

When Selena Gomez got back together with Justin Bieber, she knew she was going back to a world of sizzurp, romantical dick texts, and unbridled ballerism. It was a risk she was willing to take for love, but that was before the eggs. None y’all said nothing ’bout no eggs. Radar reports: has exclusively learned that Bieber’s on-again, off-again girlfriend Selena Gomez was at the 19-year-old’s Calabasas, Calif., home on the night in question when he allegedly hurled eggs at a neighbors’ property, causing more than $20,000 in damage.
Gomez, 21, had attended a party at Bieber’s home with a group of pals, a source close to the situation has confirmed.
She had romantically reunited with the “Baby” hit-maker days earlier, having been photographed riding on Segways in his exclusive neighborhood.
It’s understood Gomez hasn’t spoken to investigators about the incident — she left before cops arrived on the scene that night — and it’s not even known if investigators are even aware that she was at the home.

And now comes the time in every girl’s life where she has to choose between her gangsta and doing what’s right. If she don’t say nuttin’, she’ll spend the rest of her life wondering if dis is da night her soulja’s gonna get yolked. But if she rats him out, there goes the greatest love she’d ever known. And, damn, if that love weren’t sweet:

The leaked texts begin innocently enough:
“Baby come on. I love you,” says Maybe Bieber.
“I don’t buy that bullshit anymore,” Maybe Gomez responds. “I was honest with you and I gave you a second chance. All my friends were right, You’re such an a**hole.”
Dejected Maybe Bieber doesn’t give up: “You’re all I need right now. I know I can make it right with you.”
“U r a drug addict,” she counters. “U need help.”
Then Maybe Bieber goes for the kill:
“Come on. Don’t tell me you don’t miss this,” the text says next to a picture of an erect penis. (RadarOnline notes that Bieber is left-handed, and the person in the photo “grabs his genitals with his left hand.” Case closed.)

As wise Benjamin Franklin once said to Abe Lincoln in one of them wars with the powdered wigs and shit, “The heart wants what the heart wants, jigga. The heart wants what the heart wants.”

Photo: Getty, Splash News