Justin Bieber Bought A $10.8 Million House To Bang Selena Gomez In

March 5th, 2012 // 79 Comments
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For my 18th birthday, my parents gave me an Nintendo 64 with a copy of GoldenEye and let me have a couple buddies over to spend the night throwing proximity mines at each others dicks. Except after midnight, we snuck out so I could buy cigars because I no longer had a Cinderella license (Everyone else was still 17.), and also make a pit stop at the local adult bookstore which was essentially a 15 second experience of me walking into a wall of dildos, seeing two frightening horned up truckers about to jerk off in a port-a-john and running right the fuck out to get grounded as soon as we got home. So you could almost say Justin Bieber spent his 18th birthday in a similar fashion by buying a $10.8 million mansion from Ashton Kutcher to bang a multi-ethnic, barely legal hottie in for hours on end. The Daily Mail reports:

The Two and A Half Men star has reportedly been renting the house for $50,000 a month since his split from wife Demi Moore in November.
With plenty of space, Justin has ample places to play as the home features five bedrooms, set across 9,400 square feet.
Looking over Lake Hollywood, the large living room has walls of glass, allowing the pop superstar to have a perfect view of the stunning scenery.
And both Justin and Selena will have plenty to keep them occupied with a private movie theatre, a bar area, and even a gym and massage room to treat themselves to.

So basically what this story is telling us is Selena Gomez doesn’t give head yet. “So, baby, I was thinking since I bought this mansion maybe you could you know.. Ha! What? No, I wasn’t going to ask that! I was going to ask if you, uh, if you could have a snuggle party watching Titanic with me. Whee! Snuggle party. Don’t hug me right now.”

Photos: Fame/Flynet, INFdaily, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Nice house.. Now he has to go to Sears and buy a lawnmower.

  2. AteIsEnough

    I would too if I could.

  3. Cleaning Lady

    She makes him cum in a tissue.

  4. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Emily
    Commented on this photo:

    Did anyone else notice the door behind her says drug screens???

  5. cathy

    leave those young people alone. let them enjoy their youth. you people are evil.

  6. El Jefe

    Well good for him.

    I am still not 100% convinced that he has ever seen her naked or penetrated her body, but they sure do a good job of making you think so.

  7. EricLr

    Back in the 90′s, I remember reading about Corey Haim’s bankruptcy auction. It featured tricked-out BMV’s and Mercedes, all from 1987, a big mansion from 1987, Rolexes from 1987, etc.

    When you’re young, you always think it will last forever. This is why letting your kid become a child star is about the worst form of child abuse there is. Even molested kids eventually put it past them. But child stars never seem to get over the fact that it comes to an end one day, P-Diddy stops returning your calls, the checks stop coming in, and the roles dry up. Then you’re just a joke on some reality show where everyone laughs at you.

    • plop goes the weasel

      well said, brah…

      and c’mon fish, we all know that “seeing two frightening horned up truckers about to jerk off in a port-a-john” equals “I was happily violated by a trucker and a lot lizard, both foamin’ and a frothin,’ and was the receptacle for their ejaculate”

  8. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Hume
    Commented on this photo:

    The sideways cross means she only does missionary.

  9. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    blahahahah
    Commented on this photo:

    Jesus she loves letting her ass hang out lately. Not complaining.

  10. selena gomez a hottie?
    nope. she is nothing to brag about even a little. she wasn’t even the best looking chick on wizards.

  11. DeucePickle

    Yeah, but does Beiber’s Bone Palace have proximity mines in the Complex or rockets in the Basement ?

  12. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    yyyuummmmm

  13. “A large living room with walls of glass”? Thousands of paparazzi just sprang hard-ons and burst into tears simultaneously.

  14. SFRowGuy

    he’s going to call it ‘The Patty Shack’ … patty as in patty cakes

  15. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Great White Pygmy
    Commented on this photo:

    And this is why it’s called a “Honey Wagon”

  16. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Lee
    Commented on this photo:

    slut

  17. Zip-Nada

    The place looks great. Still, it’s weird that two teenagers can buy a home like that. Most are happy if they get a used car.

  18. Burger King Bathroom

    I mean lets me honest, I would destroy that gomez piece of ass. But if I were Bieber, I would have banged her just long enough to remember her name. Seek and destroy while you can kid……

  19. stacy

    His parents really hope he is banging Selena, they think he is gay also.

  20. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    stacy
    Commented on this photo:

    Beautiful face, firm tits, long smooth legs and she is LEGAL.
    Whats not to love? Oh yeah…RICH.

  21. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    stacy
    Commented on this photo:

    She is not slutting it up like other desperate whores. She is not wearing high heels with shorts. Plus she is wearing underwear.

  22. anonymous

    It’s actually kind of hilarious how much money Justin Bieber– while she banks all of hers. When they break up– and we all know they will– he’s going to look like ass and be broke.

    As skinny as she is now even if she gains a few pounds due to age, she’s going to look hot and still have all her Disney money.

  23. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    erika
    Commented on this photo:

    OK… well I honestly don’t know why some celebrities feel it is OK to wear shorts that will show your bottoms. Not a cute fashion statement. More of a I need attention statement. Man I’m sorry I don’t care how old you are or how famous you are, to wear that on the street on a normal day to day experience…. Not a good idea.

  24. j

    Did anyone else realize that the first part of the ‘quote’ is discussing Ashton Kutcher?? The Fish has gone into Perez territory–not funny, ignorant of any viewpoints besides his own, and can’t even put together a coherent post. Hmm…may be time to jump ship.

  25. Jam

    Jebus fucking almighty. That weasel is only 18, and buys $10M houses?

    I’m 30, work a normal job, I’ve got about $5000 on my bank account, that’s like my life savings as of now, all the money I own. I haven’t even owned a house yet.

    Life is pretty unfair.

  26. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Mojo
    Commented on this photo:

    She always looks so stressed out.

  27. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Joe Testarosa
    Commented on this photo:

    I think its a great idea!

  28. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Joe Testarosa
    Commented on this photo:

    I can not believe THIS hot thing is bumping uglies with a child like Justin Bieber. Wow just wow!

  29. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Joe Testarosa
    Commented on this photo:

    Uh oh. Looks like someone might be getting a pregnancy test.

  30. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Georgio
    Commented on this photo:

    Fantastic idea! Er…as long as it’s not Snooky!

  31. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Panty Smeller
    Commented on this photo:

    Sweet Mary Mother of all that is good and pure. It’s not even honey; it’s like honey covered strawberries wrapped in sweet smelling herbs and perfection.

  32. forrest

    ….plus a travel trailer with swimming pool next to his house so his mother can keep an eye on her boy.

  33. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    _mw
    Commented on this photo:

    In her defense, she is on the set of a movie called Spring Breakers, I assume this is meant to look like this for filming purposes.

  34. whocareslol

    look at her little flaccid ass hanging out

  35. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    whocareslol
    Commented on this photo:

    tuck that flaccid ass up

  36. Swearin

    If it could be revealed that Biebs & Gomez have a secret exhibitionist fetish, hence why they’re getting a place together with huge glass walls so they can fuck in full view of the public and it would be captured by every pap alive and posted all over the Internet, well…that would be much appreciated. Let’s make this happen, Fates.

  37. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Biff
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously…can’t any of these hacks walk themselves? Seems like they all need handlers, and this princessa is certainly no exception, even if she’s feigning indifference to the guy.

  38. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    g
    Commented on this photo:

    If those shorts were orange, I would be compelled to order beer and wings….

  39. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Buddy the Elf
    Commented on this photo:

    Gorgeous.

  40. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    gregg
    Commented on this photo:

    hottest disney girl ever

  41. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    richie
    Commented on this photo:

    …and she hasn’t even peaked yet!

  42. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    andrea
    Commented on this photo:

    she is uglyyyyyy!

  43. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    god i would eat out that pussy all nite long

  44. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Sprmcandy
    Commented on this photo:

    Could her shorts be any shorter ??

  45. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Ruckus
    Commented on this photo:

    I want to bite her like an apple… or a moose pie.

  46. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    herp
    Commented on this photo:

    derp

  47. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Ollie
    Commented on this photo:

    Wait so she’s an actor?
    I was wondering what she did for a living – apart from the obvious.

  48. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    The Cynic
    Commented on this photo:

    This, Is Perfection.

  49. Selena Gomez Legs Jean Shorts
    Commented on this photo:

    slutena homez

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