After putting this whole paternity test in his reahview (I have no idea why I used that reference.), a triumphant Justin Bieber brought Selena Gomez to the American Music Awards last night where he’d earlier serenaded her during rehearsals which apparently works well with women because she practically banged him in the front row during the show. Otherwise, we have to consider the fact his Maple powers work like roofies now and none of you are safe. (I wear lead underwear. FACE.) Anyway, Selena Gomez rocked a ton of skin because I guess she really wants people to know how grown up and mature she is even though her date looks like an eight-year-old wearing his dad’s tux and probably has Micro Machines in his pockets. “Moms says long as I don’t bring the ones that make noise, it’s okay.”
Photo: Getty, Splash News
“They don’t sell beaver tails here! How many goddamn times do I have to tell you this!?”
You know you are rich and famous when you can go to a special occasion dressed like this and your date not only agrees to still go with you but actually pretends to be enjoying yourself.
Serious, he’s got that much cash and he’s wearing a clip?
Have to hand it to the tuxedo rental place…talk about chutzpah. “Yes, Mr. Bieber, this is exactly the tuxedo you should wear to such an occasion. You say velvet suit with tails and am embroidered sash makes you look like a waiter in a waiter in an upscale restaurant catering to the transgendered? Not at all sir, I assure you this will be a big hit. And you can have it for fif…er, eighty thousand dollars.”
Doesn’t he look like Hillary Swank when she was in “Boys Don’t Cry”? I swear he looks like a girl pretending to be boy!
I’ve always thought that he looked like Hilary Swank.
he’s been working on that ‘stache since november 1st… if he keeps it up, it will be visible from more than 2 feet away for Movember 2012.
hahahaa
This makes the AMA’s look so awkward, and not a lot of fun to go to. No wonder there’s always a few certain people who show up to awards shows drunk. It seems like one of those mandatory assemblies you had to go to in middle/high school.
That debonair little bastard strikes again!
Is that a ZIPPER on his suit jacket? Are buttons too hard for him? I bet his shoes are velcro, or maybe just slip on.
Oh gross. I just realized his “suit jacket” is not only zippered, but quilted. Way to class things up, Biebs.
Oh fuck it is quilted. I hate everything about this. :’(
I retract my former statement about liking said jacket.
“How many times do I have to tell you? I do not trust you anymore when you say you are going to the bathroom to just pee!!”
Too much make up there, Bieber. Gotta take tips from Gomez.
Why is Selena Gomez dating a lesbian disguised as Hugh Hefner?
Now why can’t girls like her have a wardrobe malfunction?
really? he couldn’t be bothered to have his stylist order a real bow-tie and then have his assistant tie it for him?
really.
Where do all the babysitters sit?
Hugh Hefner wants his tuxedo back.
How come there’s a lesbian transvestite standing next to selena gomez and why is it wearing a tuxedo?
I see Ken is cheating on Barbie http://barbeeandfriendsdollclothes.com/images/ken-tux.jpg
Wanna smell my finger?
this is how big my penis is.
by far the ugliest suit I have ever seen. This kid needs to hire a stylist cuz what he’s doing isn’t working.
UM…can we talk about the fact that Bieber is wearing a clip on bow-tie? Seriously? Jesus…
If would have been a total misstep if not for his clip on bow tie. That really saved the look. Classic.
Is she hamstering a meatball in her cheek?
I love it when the preschoolers play dress up just like actual adults. Or actual stars for that matter.
Somewhere Carey Grant and Myrna Loy are glad they’re dead.
“My. Armrest. Bitch.”
So wait. Underneath the quilted jacket, he was wearing velour waders?
That would explain the fishing lure on his lapel. Of course, it doesn’t explain the why of velour waders.
looks like lesbian couple.
When did Don Knotts come back from the dead?
Wow, that kid really needs to fire his stylist….ridiculous hair, suit, tie. He looks like a moron.
Baby Hef !
At least her wedding dress is better then Britney’s was. This isn’t a wedding? But why is that lady dressed worse then the bride and carrying the train?
Selena finally starts to look like a woman while the Bieber like a proud lesbian. Good for them.
So are pre-pubescent boys going to start rocking THIS do now?
I can barely describe how much I want to fuck that little girl.
The Maple Christ rocked a velvet tux and brought the Feed the Children girl he sponsors each month.
Guess which one likes maple flavored peen?
His suit is fucking velour. My fucking eyes.
that little fuck beeber doesn’t deserve this …
what a dwarf hes like 5’5. forever a manlet
I like his jacket.
That’s the only compliment he gets.
That took all his courage.
That looks high maintenance.
I’ll have the bitch sandwich to go.
“No! You have to insert three at a time, like this!”
The direction it points when Usher walks in the room.
Most forced smile ever.