Justin Bieber Rides ATVs, Yo, He’s Hard

September 3rd, 2013 // 28 Comments
Justin Bieber ATV Instagram

Over the weekend, TMZ reported, with photos (below) that Justin Bieber was attacked in a Toronto nightclub until he eventually had to be saved by security. Which really doesn’t look good for his new Wyld Kidz image, so he did what any hardass motherfucker would do and tweeted a photo of himself riding an ATV with his shirt off then dedicated it to TMZ with a smiley face emoticon. I heard Harvey Levin still won’t come out from under his desk that’s how real this shit just got. The kid used the black and white Instagram filter. Black and white.

Justin Bieber Nightclub Attack

Oh, snap, them the eyes of a killa, dawg! A KILLA.

Photos: TMZ / Instagram


  1. single strand of barbed wire, 3 and a half foot off the ground, 35 mph on the four wheeler.

  2. Thats not even a real ATV, thats we give the kids to ride in Canada.

    oh and once again I apologise for Canada for this douche bag

  3. Ana

    I feel like Miley Cyrus and Justin Beiber should be a thing now. They’re both all grown up and shit, they can be all adult and stuff together. It just feels right, y’know?

  4. broduhjenner

    there should be a bumper sticker on the back that reads “baby on board.”

  5. It’s like looking at a pile of overpriced sunglasses, gold necklaces and this week’s baseball cap set atop a bag of Wonder bread.

    You can tattoo the bread. The bread can screw fanatical groupies and inexplicable movie stars, get stoned with actual black people, and even scuffle in nightclubs when drunk people do what they swore to themselves they would do if they ever laid eyes on the bread in person.

    But in the end, it is still just what holds the bologna and mayo together.

  6. Ben Dover

    Hey I got that half size atv for my 8 year old daughter she likes it too

  7. I heard that riding over really bumpy terrain helps reverse undescended testicles.

  8. Really....?

    I can’t help noticing how much smaller whats between his legs is than that fellow next to him….its almost like he’s trying to tell us something…

  9. stevebrt

    Of course he’s hard there’s a topless muscled black guy right there

  10. vandal

    I couldn’t dream up a gayer picture if I tried.

  11. Schweddy Snatch

    Black and white Instagram filter…check. Black and white guys featured in the photo…check. Someone call Terry Richardson. THIS is the exactly right balance of attitude and art he should be striving for.

  12. He is cheating on Usher, man that dude is going to be pissed.

  13. For some bizarre reason this reminds me of the Eddie Murphy and Joe Piscopo parody of “Ebony and Ivory”… who neither of these no-talent jackholes are even old enough to remember.

  14. Jbeebsux

    Nothing says “hard” like a candy necklace and a “please don’t move this thing. Is it on?” look.

  15. Justin loves the dark meat.

  16. Bob

    Gee, that looks like a movie poster from one of John Water’s old movies. So, who gives the BJ and eats dog poo?

  17. Dr.J

    THIS IS WHAT HAPPENS WHEN YOU GET LAID TOO MUCH! I’m sorry but it is. I know we’re all just trying to have a good time and get laid and think we’re hot shit, but we’re not. Did you take a dump today? Because I did. Three or four. But these guys forget that. Because too many girls are like, dude, you could take a shit in my mouth and I’d thank you for it. That’s not good for people. That’s bad for your character.

  18. Dr.J

    Or, conversely, BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO. Hiss.

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