Justin Bieber’s With Michelle Rodriquez Now

The Superficial / July 31, 2014

Presumably because Zac Efron lacked too many of the soft, feminine features Michelle Rodriguez desires in a mate (Read: Vagina. He didn’t have a vagina.), here’s Justin Bieber partying with her in Ibiza yesterday because fucking with other people’s exes has been going great for him so far. Then again, TMZ says he’s actually there banging model Shanina Shaik, except that information can fuck itself because it won’t end with Cara Delevingne beating Justin Bieber down harder than Orlando Bloom ever could. Which is probably the most realistic scenario I’ve ever written on this site. You can print it out and hang it in the Smithsonian, and people will be like, “Yes, that occurred in our history. During Neil Armstrong’s moon walk. I remember it well.”

Photos: Xposure / AKM-GSI, Fame/Flynet, INFphoto, Splash News