Justin Bieber Drove Over 100 MPH, Putting Other Drivers At Risk Because The Paparazzi Did It First

July 9th, 2012 // 91 Comments
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Justin Bieber
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Justin Bieber continued his metamorphosis into a selfish Hollywood shit-weasel who can’t take responsibility for his own actions by doing over 100 mph on Highway 101, causing 10 other drivers on the road to call 911, because – wait for it – the paparazzi was chasing him. TMZ reports:

Justin Bieber has filed a harassment complaint against one of the paparazzi who chased him down an L.A. freeway Friday — claiming the guy was a maniac on the road … and put several lives in danger.
A CHP officer dropped by Justin’s music video shoot downtown Friday (above) — and law enforcement sources tell us, the officer was there to take Justin’s statement after the singer filed the complaint.
We’re told Justin originally reached out to police following Friday’s high speed chase — because the photog in question had been extremely aggressive on the road … much worse than the other photogs.

Let’s just start picking this apart for the horseshit it is, and it’s almost too easy:

1. Justin Bieber was concerned that the paparazzi were putting lives at risk, so he decided to put a stop to it by doing 100 mphs and.. putting lives at risk?
2. He was behind the wheel of a car with tinted windows. Tinted windows. Just stop and let them take pics of a black window until the cops show up. Or, you know, keep driving like a normal person. On that note:
3. His Israeli ex-Special Forces bodyguard is with him at all times. The dude probably holds the kid’s penis while he takes a leak just so he doesn’t accidentally molest himself. At no point is he ever in danger. Selena Gomez could say, “Wow, that was over fast,” and the dude would have Bieber’s ears covered before a single word touched his eardrums while checking him for scratch marks. He’s that good. (If you think I’m over-exaggerating the man’s credentials, every single day he gets in a car with Justin Bieber behind the wheel. There’s laughing in the face of death, and then there’s shitting on its foot while staring it directly in the eye.)

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Fame/Flynet, Pacific Coast News

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  1. Shasta

    Why is he on a Segway?

    I’m not going to bother responding to the rest of the story. It’s my way of mirroring all of the effort the authorities will put into punishing him.

  2. JC

    I thought stainless steel cars went out with the Delorian?

    • the sad thing about it is Back to the Future was put out in 1985 and Justin Bieber wasn’t born until 1994.

    • The Royal Penis

      Not that it matters but I believe it’s polished aluminum.

      Thing is, just because douche nozzle take the car up to 2/3 of it’s capability doesn’t make him much different from your average 18 year old.

      100 mph with today’s technology isn’t even that fast anymore.

      I guess in a weird way I’m defending him…to me it’s a right of passage so to speak with a young man pushes a vehicle past 100 mph….let’s the safety freaks go beserk but it is what it is.

      I’m sure officer safety and the state of CA are gonna throw the book at him…but he’s got the money/lawyers to deal with it…unlike your average 18 year old.

  3. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    ksmack
    Commented on this photo:

    Is this one of the most obnoxious vehicles you have ever seen–i mean, beside the pink valtrex-mobile?

  4. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    This kid has got to be the biggest fucking fuck of all fucking time. WHY ARE CHILDREN ALLOWED TO MAKE MUSIC PURCHASE DECISIONS?! WHY? If left to the adults we’d never have to be exposed to this punk. Fucking Usher.

  5. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    “WHERE’S MY GODDAMNED LATTE?!?! I swear to god, if I have to take one step, ONE FUCKING STEP, off my Segway, someone’s face is getting kicked in by my bodyguards. Understand? Now, GET ME MY LATTE YOU BITCHES!”

    • Burt

      Actually, if you listened to his 911 call you’d know he’s actually very polite, although he’s also clearly not particularly mature or eloquent.

  6. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    The car, the acid washed jean jacket, the hair, the glasses, AND the Segway. It’s the Perfect Storm of Douchitude.

    • The bandanna. Fucking kid is no Tupac. OMG he’s making my blood boil. If given a choice I would rather have to be exposed to Kim Karfrankenstein than this little punk ass bitch. God, why does he make me hate?

      • Kimmothy

        AnnaR, I feel the same way. I can’t remember the last time a celebrity, and a child one at that, has made the top of my head want to implode like this asswipe does. It’s like you can FEEL the levels of fuckery he’s aspiring to reach at such a young age and at this rate he’ll be King of All Schmuckdom by the time he’s legal.

  7. segwaysmakeyerdicksmall

    Can they just give him a ticket for getting on that douche mover called a segway?

  8. mismy

    When I was 18 I would drive as fast as my shitty car would go. If I had access to his hideous yet awesome vehicle in those days, I would’ve sped just about everywhere. Not defending the little lady, but can’t be a hypocrite either.

    • cc

      It occurs to me occasionally that I may not having any good luck left…I used it up NOT getting killed behind the wheel of car.

      (And to those people whose front lawn I slid across backwards, whose junipers I uprooted, and whose fence I ruined….the girl I was with never saw me again, so I WAS actually punished.)

  9. Frank Burns

    That’s what happens when you buy a Chinese-made flux capacitor from Wal-Mart.

  10. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Raoul
    Commented on this photo:

    Officer, you have a gun. Right there! For the same of all that is good and holy in his world, use it!

  11. Ammortal

    I can’t wait for something bad to happen to him.

  12. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    Justin: “Well, is everything straightened out?”
    Cop: “We are ready whenever you are.”
    Justin: “Doesn’t it look like I’m ready? I am ALWAYS ready! I have BEEN ready since first call! I AM READY! Roll!”
    Cop: “You’re not going to let me arrest you, are you?”
    Justin: “ACTION!”
    Cop: *sigh* “I hate my job.

  13. El Jefe

    Are there Hollywood douche consultants that get paid to find ways to make celebrities like this creature look as douchey as humanly possible?

  14. Bane

    Why couldn’t this have been in a tunnel in Paris?

  15. Archie Leach

    “Like Corey Feldman and Frankie Muniz and Justin Bieber and an adorable teddy bear…… after awhile no one gives a shit”.

  16. “Justin Bieber continued his metamorphosis into a selfish Hollywood shit-weasel who can’t take responsibility for his own action”

    What the hell are you talking about? Bieber has been a selfish Hollywood shit-weasel for years now.

  17. Cock Dr

    RE: bodyguard “probably holds the kid’s penis while he takes a leak ”
    There is no penis on that little Canadian lipstick lesbian.

  18. Princess Di was killed because her driver was trying to outrun the Paps; too bad this didn’t happen to the Biebs.

  19. blondewithnobrain

    Hopefully this will get his green card revoked and they will deport his girly ass back to Canada. Hey Justin…don’t want the paps to see you…how ’bout not driving around in a freaking CHROME car you idiot!! way to be incognito!!!

    • Tourette's Syndrome Kid

      Whoa there a minute… We don’t want the little fucktard back! Put him on some island full off ebola infected monkeys, for shit’s sake. Better yet, take the little bastard and bury him with another of our great exports – Celine Dion..

    • Burt

      Well, if it wasn’t for an American record company he’d still be singing on Youtube. So, I don’t really consider him a Canadian export as much as he’s an American import.

  20. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    “Well, officer, I’m from Canada, where the speed limit is 100. Wait—what are these ‘miles’ to which you’re referring?”

  21. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Taftytafttaft
    Commented on this photo:

    I hope Im not the only one thinking of Weird Al and his “White and Nerdy” parody; however, Weird Al has more class and talent then the above assbag.

  22. DiM

    Justin Timberlake would never have put others in danger!

  23. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    catapostrophe
    Commented on this photo:

    Since noone blurred the license plate, we can all wreak havoc with the power such information provides!

    • vgrly

      I’m sure that’s the only mirrored paintjob car driven by a pansy out there on the streets of LA. No need for a license plate. This kid is starting to irk me so bad.

    • You mean like who owns it? What do you think you’ll find out, where he lives? Most likely it’s registered to his production company or management.

  24. TheMonkeemobile

    This should be the new picture in wiki under the heading “Douchenozzle”

  25. ndy

    the little shit will take everything the public gives him, money, fame, et al. but he wants his privacy. i don’t think it works that way.

  26. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    So, he walks like the Cheetohs cheetah?

  27. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    If he’d done that with something dark and black in his right hand, it would have been really interesting.

  28. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    When your dumbass shoes weigh 50+lbs it’s probably hard to maintain the speed limit.

  29. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    cc
    Commented on this photo:

    Mutters to himself ‘To the douchemobile Batman!’

  30. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Monkey Business
    Commented on this photo:

    C’mon Mr. Bieber! I’m not going to handcuff you no matter how much you beg me. And put your pants back on!!!

  31. Ricardo

    Even Rodney King would say: DO IT!

  32. Wait… didn’t he beat up a pap a little while ago? I’ve gotta call bullshit on this story. No pap would dare tangle with The Beebz now that he’s made his bones.

  33. blah

    It’s the 101, tha highway is dedicated to douchebags. All the people who called 9/11 were other douchebags driving erratically too. Everybody does that on that highway, it’s the law, that’s why the police aren’t even going after Bieber.

    • If you actually lived out here in LA, you’d know no one refers to it as a “highway”. Freeway, motherfucker. And the while most people would be delighted to leave Burbank in their rearview at 100mph, the goddamn thing is so jammed up most of the time that attaining that speed is miraculous.

      • Burt

        Idiot. A freeway is a kind of highway.

      • Idiot. He was talking about what people call it in L.A., not whether or not the 101 was or was not actually a highway.

        And he’s also right that the 101 (and the 5 and the 405) tend to be stupid busy. Honestly, though, I don’t think I ever saw anyone break 90 on the 101. I’m sure it happens, but it’s the exception rather than the rule.

      • Burt apparently has trouble with word comprehension, specifically the phrase “no one refers to it as a ‘highway’”.

    • Glass

      And you dial “911″, not “9/11″. One is the emergency hotline, the other is the biggest terrorist attack in American history, and you can’t call it no matter how much you try.

  34. SeeAlice

    He is such a wuss . The cars he owns will go 200mph and he oly drives at 100mph . Wuss.

  35. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Rutty
    Commented on this photo:

    When you can’t grow a mustache on your face, wear it as the grill of your car.

  36. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    BrandiLye
    Commented on this photo:

    Get that turd, officer. Can you cite him for the music too?

  37. Carla

    Fluffing Usher sure pays well.

  38. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Samantha
    Commented on this photo:

    Where did the seqway come from? Did he have someone go buy it from him or does it stow away under the passenger seat?!

  39. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    Commented on this photo:

    On the set of the live-action movie, “Mr. Banana Grabber”

  40. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    brian peppers
    Commented on this photo:

    Doesn’t anybody walk in America any more?

  41. fuckityfuck

    Letterman should’ve kept squeezing until his head popped

  42. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    fuckityfuck
    Commented on this photo:

    Tupac called, he wants you to take off that ridiculous bandana because: 1. You’re not black 2. You look ridiculous 3. I hope a REAL gang banger shoots you

  43. Kimmothy

    Also, Zooey D. & all the other hipster girls called; they want their fake glasses back.

  44. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    blev
    Commented on this photo:

    Not even a goddamn reservoir-tip-hat can save all the coherence of thought his reps so assiduously fap out.

  45. Nope

    And another celebrity fucks up royally, yet basically gets a pass from the LA cops. I swear to god, the LA judicial system sucks the celebrity dick…

  46. The kid’s a tool. He drives a Fisker, which is a company that MaObama gave millions to, only to see them ship their jobs (along with our money – yes, ours) over to Finland (but MSNBC doesn’t tell you that, right? They are running with the whole Romney shipped jobs oversees bullshit still). Then he drives over 100 mph, with tinted windows, so they couldn’t see him anyway (ooo, I’m so scared! They can seee meeeee!” )I am so fucking sick of these celebutard ass-pussies I wanna vomit. And I wanna buy a Tesla – they are made in the USA

  47. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    FUZZ LOVER
    Commented on this photo:

    The little dumbfuck who’s barely out of diapers is driving this toy? His parents probably had to sign on the dotted line, before purchasing it.

  48. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    FUZZ LOVER
    Commented on this photo:

    Same type RACING SHOES Jeff “TINKERBELL” Gordon wears while driving…

  49. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    anonym
    Commented on this photo:

    what a little bitch.

    he should get multiple hefty tickets and his car impounded.

    that chrome shit must be a traffic hazard

  50. Justin Bieber Pulled Over Speeding Driving Recklessly
    FUZZ LOVER
    Commented on this photo:

    Wish the cop was trigger-happy!

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