Julia Roberts looks interesting

April 5th, 2006 // 87 Comments

I’m pretty sure Julia Roberts didn’t get a nose job, but I can’t figure out how I could have gone this long without noticing how incredibly gigantic her nose is. She was spotted leaving the Bernard B. Jacobs Theater after a performance of her Broadway play “Three Days of Rain” and judging by the picture I can only assume she was off to buy a flying broomstick. And maybe one of those big pointy hats. And a black cat. And anything else that would imply she’s turning into a witch, because clearly she’s turning into a witch.

Thanks to Tara for the tip, and for letting me spread rumors that we totally did it in the bathroom.



  1. CheekyChops

    OMG I need to go back to my happy place!

  2. LiveFromNY

    She is not ready for her close up, Mr. DeMille.

  3. The reason you haven’t noticed that huge schnozz before is because you’ve ever been drawn to her enormous horse-mouth. Somehow, the photographer managed to get a non-slack-jawed picture of Julia Roberts.

    • I would like to see photos before her teenage nose job. My uncle was a plastic surgeon, and when you look at a photo and see a “C” above the lip, like a small smile, it is a dead givaway. She had surgery later to improve it, but yes, it is still quite large. Look at her brother, Eric; she had the female version-never would have made it without the first operation.

  4. gsprescueguy

    I’ve never seen Howard Stern without his glasses.

  5. Mr. Fritz

    Fifth Post! Ok, got that out of my system. However, I will add a comment this time.
    #2, lmao with your comment. Yeah, what happened to her? She looks better as a redhead like Lindsey Lohan. If it ain’t broke, don’t fix it!

  6. tlcccc123

    Never having been a big JR fan, I can say that her schnaze is second only to those giant chicklets she calls teeth.

  7. sweetcheeks

    Eye of newt, anyone?

  8. sweetcheeks

    And what’s with that caterpillar over her eye? Jesus, Julia — TWEEZERS.

    Looks like she’s wearing Magnum P.I.’s moustache as a forehead accessory. They’re all the rage in Hollywood.

  9. BarbadoSlim

    Right at this moment, that camera guy who left his wife for this creature is realising what a huuuuuge mistake he made.

    enjoy your hag sir.

  10. bjpack

    #4, hahahahahahahaha!! That was good.

  11. tits_on_snack

    “I’ve seen that crappy Julia Roberts movie forty-seven times. Have you seen the lips on that woman? Like a baboon’s ass on her face.”
    - Lois, Family Guy

    I’ve always thought she was weird and rodent-looking. Not quite as rodent-esque as Jennifer Love Hewit, but a close second.

  12. Julia’s first acting job was with her nose in the role of the K-12 mountain in John Cusack’s classic: “Better Off Dead”

  13. SuperSpence

    That sure is a Pretty Woman! Seriously, the sea hag ain’t aging well. She needs to start bathing in the blood of virgins. Works for Sharon Stone.

  14. i’m glad to see the superficial getting in the spirit of the kentucky derby, as it is only a month away…thanks for this pic of the odds on favorite…she’s sure to win or at the very least place…i can just see jockey pat day mounting her…

  15. Italian Stallion

    And your little dog too…..

  16. Grphdesi23

    In other news, Garth Brooks’ ex-wife, Sandy, was briefly kidnapped.

  17. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    I would say something mean, but to me she looks exactly the same in this picture as she’always looked, just older. So the only thing I can really say here is, “I told you so”.

  18. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh


  19. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    I mean to say “off” the chain. Please excuse my typographical error.

  20. Pie Man

    #15 – And your little dog too…..


  21. Qdarks

    the nose :O

  22. krisdylee

    well done italian stallion…

  23. Nimuë LaMer

    She looks so…


  24. Can’t stand this bitch. Not only does she have a big, oddly shaped schnoz, a huge, horse mouth, and monkey ears, but she’s a shitheel to boot. Her brother Eric, who’s a far better actor, got Julia her start in the biz. When his career stalled while hers was skyrocketing, did she lend a hand to her bro? Help him with a role here or there? Nope. Supposedly nasty to personal assistants, also (then again, PAs aren’t people – right?). Bottomline, Julia’s a media fabrication – just like Kate Moss and J-Lo. They ain’t hot, no matter what Us, People, or Entertainment Weekly tells us.

  25. suzy

    i think she looks fine! I think she just came out of doing her show on broadway… plus she has to go home and take care of twins…

    i think she looks awesome

  26. PapaHotNuts

    pl. ostrich or os

  27. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Wikipedia much, Mr. HotNutz?

  28. Tetsuo

    I’d put my money on her to win the Kentucky Derby.

  29. PapaHotNuts

    Only when I don’t know too much about what I’m talking about.

    So basically, all day, every day.

    By the way, you have been fucking hilarious lately! Keep rockin’ in the free world.

  30. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    I have my VAULT ENERGY DRINK to thank for my newfound hilarity. It kicks like a soda and stings like a pitchfork or something like that… uhhhhhh, I think I’m burning out… someone get me lightbulb full of meth before I pass out at my desk…

  31. PapaHotNuts

    oshkosh- Are you becoming a NASCAR driver? What’s up with the product placement? Wait a second, I’ll have to get back with you. My new MOTOROLA CELL PHONE is ringing. I got a great deal deal through CINGULAR WIRELESS. My new CHEVY TAHOE with SIRIUS SATELLITE RADIO got me safely to the store to purchase it.

  32. oshkoshb-goshdammgosh

    Dude, you’re so getting in trouble for those promotional comments.

  33. Spacedog

    Last time I saw a mouth like that, it had a hook in it.

  34. that-dog-is-shifty-eyed

    Nick Nolte hates her. He said she was the most high maintenance bitch he has ever worked with. This is some feat considering he did ‘Blue Chips’ with Shaq.

  35. Dam she looks huffed out. She looks like she was sniffing paint with a rag. Happy camper gal you.

  36. jennifer11

    with a beak like that, i’ll bet she can catch fish midflight.

  37. Binky

    Kudos to #15. When I saw this picture up on the wall at the local Munchkin Post Office – I wasn’t taking it too seriously. Tanx for the ‘heads-up.’

  38. bigtuna299

    High Ho Julia away!!

  39. Kbartender

    Ok, numero 18… Holy cow, I just drooled my coffee all over my keyboard I was laughing so hard. Thank you.

  40. kazanski13

    Can somebody follow the breadcrumbs to her house I am pretty sure you will find her kids cooking away in the oven.

  41. Ms Crackalackin

    Ok, I’m no fan of Julia’s, BUT her nose is NOT huge and is actually quite refined looking. In fact, plastic surgeons say her nose is frequently requested by patients. It is really cute from the side, so bugger off.

    That said, she is a major biatch and I think Danny is going to dump her butt some day. Who can forget her t-shirt “A-low Vera”
    as a jab to the pregnant wife of the man she stole? You can’t get much biatchier than that. The fact that she’s on Broadway now instead of retiring to be with her twins shows the size of this woman’s ego. She needs to go back to the ranch asap.

  42. katie

    the fact that she wants to work now that her kids are a few years old shows the size of her ego? i am sorry what year were you born in? is this 1956 instead of 2006? that was the most retarded comment ever.

    she may be a bitch, but it has nothing to do with her wanting to work while she has kids you loser.

    also, she was amazing in erin brockovich. not in much else though.

  43. Are you sure that isn’t the love child of Lilli Taylor and Sarah Jessica Parker? Man Pretty Woman was a LONG time ago.

  44. Evangelia

    yeah, her tits WERE pretty amazing in erin brockovich.

  45. DonLes91

    “Ok, I’m no fan of Julia’s, BUT her nose is NOT huge…”

    Dye her hair blonde, pump her with steroids adn call her Triple H.

  46. Evangelia

    on the other hand, i still love richard gere.

  47. MizScarlett

    Fun Fact: The Byrds’ “Eight Miles High” was written about JR’s forehead.

    (They also wrote one about her pointy, pointy chin, called “Get That Thing Out My Eye” but it never charted.)

  48. jugsgirl

    almost 50 comments and no “I’d hit it”.

    come on guys, does she look that bad?

  49. HollyJ

    #24 – Julia rejected her brother because her brother Eric is a total shithead deadbeat dad.

    Years ago, Eric kicked his wife Kelly and small daughter Emma out onto the street (apparently after knocking Kelly around). Julia severed any relationship with Eric because of this.

    Julia stepped up to help Kelly and Emma. She bought them a house, then later helped Kelly get full custody of Emma. Julia LOVES her niece and is very close to her.

    Julia also has been instrumental in helping Emma’s career. (Emma played Depp’s daughter in “Blow”.)

    I’m no huge fan of Julia’s, but Eric is a total asshole, and I’m personally ecstatic that he’s reduced to doing pathetic music videos.

  50. mamacita

    @30 and 31

    My husband is also a huge fan of VAULT ENERGY DRINK. He says it drinks like a soda, but kicks like crystal meth. It gives him the energy needed to clean all of our woodwork with PLEDGE WOOD CLEANER, then when he crashes, he settles down with his SUNBEAM ELECTRIC BLANKET and a TUPPERWARE bowl to catch his puke. I, on the other hand, prefer BARQS ROOT BEER. It has bite.

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