Julia Stiles in a Bikini

January 24th, 2011 // 136 Comments

So these are happening.

Here’s Julia Stiles in Maui yesterday giving the world a preview of what Dexter may or may not have left his wife for. Which in his defense, actually makes sense considering Michael C. Hall more than likely still looked better than Julia Stiles after the chemo, and who doesn’t like to be the pretty one? God knows I do. *curls eyelashes in mirror* Mmm, yeah, that’s tight. Looking tight. Gonna rent what you want tonight, sexy man. No romantic comedies. You hear me? NO ROMANTIC COMEDIES. Now get out there.

Adding… Our photo editor is a fan of Julia’s early bikini work and insisted I include this:

Photos: Splash News

superficial

  1. Julia Stiles Bikini
    ARGH
    Commented on this photo:

    Umm…yeah, I’d be all up in that in a heartbeat.

  2. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Hmmmmm
    Commented on this photo:

    Dudes in shape.

  3. Lady Blah Blah

    No.

  4. Abby

    She looks like Flat Stanley.

  5. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Dr. Hufurrrrr
    Commented on this photo:

    Seriously, can Hepatitis Pam just donate some of her many old implants? Can you get the hep from fake funbags?

  6. Jillian Junk

    Ahh goddammit!! No matter what the hell I click anymore there’s shemales on my screen!

  7. wow, not usually a fan of breast implants, but even I will say this is a job for SCIENCE!

  8. bigbadvoodoodaddy

    It’s amazing how average at best the majority of celebs look without being all professionally done up and airbrused. I wouldn’t even notice her if I passed her on that beach.

  9. marcela

    nah….

  10. GravyLeg

    Pic 3 makes me wanna Frog her…

  11. Bucky Barnes

    Chuckie with nipples? COOL!

  12. alex

    I dig it. She’s a normal person. Her teeth aren’t perfect. Her tits aren’t perfect. She’s got a few lbs to lose. SO WHAT? A real celeb and a real person, amazing.

    And she’s clearly not trying very hard! I’d take her over famewhore Ke$ha any day of the week.

    • alex

      To be fair, I’m sure most of you would prefer JS to Kesha. Hell, you’d probably choose a PillowPet over Kesha. Or a house plant or most any other inanimate object….

    • Mr. Pea-nuss

      alex, please don’t betray your fellow men by suggesting that it’s okay for women to not meet an impossible-to-realize standard of physical perfection. (Ke$ha? Why use that trailer trash skank as an basis of comparison???) Anyway, us guys have to stick together if we are to keep women under pressure to try in vain to resemble heavily Photoshopped supermodels and to have self-esteem low enough to compensate for ours.

    • Meh

      Is she really a “celeb”? She’s just some chick who’s had a couple of movie roles, that used to look cute-ish as a kid. Now she’s a boring adult with a TV role.

  13. In the wider angled picture, you can see a thousand Japanese running for their lives as Godzilla emerges from the water.

  14. Hey, I know she’s not the “hottest” chick on this site, but I’ve always had a thing for her. I really don’t know why.

    As for her boobs: good for her not getting them done. I respect that. Seriously, ladies: getting your boobs pumped up will get you more stares from us dudes, but won’t get you better guys. All guys who date chicks with nice racks, even the ones we want a relationship with, think about that first time we see your rack. Don’t disappoint us with some scars under there. It just says you lack confidence and turns some respectable guys off.

    But hey, if you get them done for more sex, nothing wrong with that either.

    • I’m with you, Willie. True, she’s a little underwhelming in the chestal region, but beyond that, she looks fit and natural, and her hair in pic 3 is pretty hot. I certainly wouldn’t kick her out of bed for eating crackers.

      And now, to save any manliness I have left, here’s the compulsory sexist joke:

      “What really matters is how delicious a sandwich she can make.”

      Okay, I’m done with this one, Your Honor.

    • Yeah, I’ve always liked her too. These pics do nothing to change my mind….

      • Jennifer

        You know how you wonder onto celeb message boards and the pics of hot guys have these really actually adorable comments from women about the hotness of said male celeb…well, that just happened but it was with guys, talking about a female celeb. You guys comments were truthful, adorable, and really just, well, cute! lol Thanks for the nice things said av=bout bidy image. I hope younger girls reqthis and take heed….men like nartural, not plastic looking, it’a other women and fashion designers that
        hate women, self-hatred.

  15. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Artimus
    Commented on this photo:

    At least there’s no pic of her sniffing her finger after.

  16. Jenny

    Hey just putting this out there. I have real boobs, they used to be a 38GG but I lost about 20 lbs and now they are a 36F but they are definitely not as perky, not really bad but I was thinking of having them done. What do people think? I dont really want the scars.

    • At the risk of feeding a troll, do you really, honestly give weight to the opinion of any of the random, anonymous assholes on this site, myself included? Really? You must be new here.

    • Vito

      On the off chance that you do pay attention to opinions in this blog, DO NOT get implants. With hooters the size of yours, you’d look like Pandora Peaks or Melanie Melons. Besides, I know tons of guys who say they’d rather be with a naturally-breasted woman than one with Tupperwear Tits.

      To be fair to you, though, you should probably post a link where we can go look at them, then we can get an informed consensus.

      • minx

        38GG? give me a break. glad to see she found 2 dum dums who actually entertain the idea of that existing in nature, aside from maybe on a 500-pound beast.

    • A girl I worked with once had a huge set of cans… it was funny, when we asked her the size, what she said sounded like “Thirty-eight, forty”. Turns out she said “38 4D”. She was anything but huge…well, except for those.

      If I remember correctly, on her last day she rode off into the sunset on a winged unicorn to a choir of angels singing, never to be seen again.

      *sniff*

      • Jenny

        I am new here but it seems to be mainly very vocal tit obsessed guys so I thought I would ask. Firstly, I am not a f-ing idiot, of course I do not put any weight on your opinion, this is completely anonymous so honestly was the appeal. Secondly, 500 lbs whale- if I weighed that much, breast surgery would be the least of my concerns. Im about 140 lbs but probably could lose more. Im from an irish family where all the woman have big boobs, my aunts are nearly hunch backs with them. Lastly, I meant just a breast lift, not bigger in size, so they would still be real just with scars. I cant ask my brothers or guy friends, and dudes lie if they think they are getting lucky.

      • alex

        No surgery. Period.

        Play the cards you’re dealt and just be happy you have a huge rack.

        And why haven’t you posted photo’s yet? Actually, come to think of it, you should probably post pics without support and another set with your hands holding them up (mimicking the procedure you’re discussing), then we can give you an honest opinion.

        (but seriously, no elective surgery ever. Unless you have a cleft palate…)

    • LEB

      Other people’s opinions should not be party of the equation, Jenny. 36F is still very large, but if you want to get a breast lift, get a breast lift. If you like them as they are, leave ‘em. If you alter your body in a major way to make someone else happy, you’re going to eventually regret it.

  17. Venereal disease

    All nipple no tit.

    *vomits in mouth*

  18. BanDit82Baby

    Is it just me…or was Stiles NEVER hot?? I would like to personally thank her for sparing us in major motion pictures by makin movies w/”substance”.

  19. Salad Face

    I’m sorry, but Dexter is NOT prettier than a young Kurt Russell!

    Fish, for shame

  20. Anya

    Too flat, needs some boob.

  21. alisa

    she’s cute, in shape, smart and from what i’ve seen of her in interviews, she seems really down to earth and obviously doesn’t care about the expectations women think they need to succumb to. she doesn’t have fake boobs and didn’t get a nose job/facial plastic surgery like EVERYONE else in hollywood.. everyone you all think is so gorgeous has had plastic surgery. just google it. but she hasn’t …and she looks normal…. but oh god noooo.. not someone natural.

  22. Julia Stiles Bikini
    hbw
    Commented on this photo:

    Apparently the wall she ran into that flattened her face also got her chest. A damn shame, I tell ya.

  23. Julia Stiles Bikini
    HiveMonster
    Commented on this photo:

    So, that’s where she left her career.

  24. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Paco von Pacostein
    Commented on this photo:

    Did she steal Aniston’s nipples?

  25. Virstin

    Thumbs up for not caving in to pressure to get a boob job. Be the person you are, Julia.

  26. Julia looks likes like a hot chick who just recently slammed her face and breasts into a wall.

  27. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:

    A little “upward dog” action there….

  28. Mr. Pea-nuss

    Julia, you need a boob job, plastic surgery, Botox, tons of makeup, liposuction, and to go on the miracle-working Anorexic-Bulimic Diet.

    Or, you could continue to be yourself and disappoint all the idiots who thing being totally superficial is cool.

    • doodles

      Yeees, cause she’s sooo fat.

      Please note my sarcasm and cram it up your loose ass hole.

      • Grace

        Uh…doodles…you read that entirely wrong.

      • doodles

        NO I di’nt!

        Seriously there’s nothing wrong with this woman. The only thing wrong is us, society, looking down our imperfect noses at these people behind our dusty and filthy computers, basking in the glow of celebrity gossip and never-ending porn!

      • Jillia

        Uh, yea you did. Read the last line of sarcasm in Pea-nuss’ post.

  29. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Tyler Perry
    Commented on this photo:

    Wow, she is apparently the “hot one” in her group of friends…scary.

  30. Kodos

    Sorry, she’s got Soon-Yi face.

    Automatic disqualifier.

  31. fucking hell it’s about time this porker had some bikini shots

  32. vandal

    She looks like Micky Dolenz.

  33. Julia Stiles Bikini
    duckbutter
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice body, but no face…. butta’ face.

  34. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Viv
    Commented on this photo:

    I had no idea it was possible to downgrade from Jennifer Carpenter..

  35. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Commented on this photo:

    OM NOM NOM NOM!!! HUNGRY BUM STRIKES AGAIN!!!

  36. Julia Stiles Bikini
    HMMM
    Commented on this photo:

    I would let her nurse me with those nipples! Yum

  37. eatme

    this dood has manboobs

  38. Julia Stiles Bikini
    GingleJanglez
    Commented on this photo:

    ugh look at that gem in the background. they allow that in hawaii? remember Indonesia? they really need a tsunami to take care of these things.

  39. Jack

    She looks like Scott Rolen’s brother.

  40. Julia Stiles Bikini
    toopier
    Commented on this photo:

    Turn around…a little more….a little more…a little more…Stop!…Now I would do you.

  41. fx

    mch must have been blinded by chemo cuz I have no idea how you hit that with your eyes @ 100%

  42. Fear of a rough nation

    Perfect for a one night stand. God damn it I’m so positive…

  43. Julia Stiles Bikini
    stevebeagle
    Commented on this photo:

    got an ugly mug

  44. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Puddin' Taine
    Commented on this photo:

    Cheers to her for doing yoga to keep tight and flexible

  45. stevebeagle

    ugly

  46. Blazing141

    She just happy ‘cuz she just won a Brendan Gleeson lookalike contest….just sayin…

    http://www.celebrityportal.org/brendan-gleeson/

  47. HackSaw

    I’d hit it.

  48. JesseJimmy

    The only acceptable explanation is that she takes it in that flat, yet lumpy, butt.

  49. lori

    She’s very pretty and natural and has a dancer’s body. 1,000 times better than most of the plastic women you post pictures of here every day.

  50. Julia Stiles Bikini
    Dweezel
    Commented on this photo:

    Yeah? Trying to be that drunken stepfather site that I
    already don’t read? She’s talented, and she’s attractive.
    A+, would hit. -d

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