Josh Hartnett’s stomach is doing just fine

April 3rd, 2009 // 34 Comments

I don’t know if this qualifies as news, but Josh Hartnett was released from Cedars-Sinai Medical Center yesterday, where he had been hospitalized since Monday for a gastrointestinal problem. People reports:

“He’s fine,” his rep Susan Patricola tells PEOPLE. “They are running tests, which take time to get back and it’s a process of elimination.”

The 30-year-old Pearl Harbor star was taken to the hospital by ambulance Monday after complaining of abdominal pains. Patricola said Hartnett was under observation for a “flare-up” of gastrointestinal problem he has been suffering from for several months since starring in the London stage version of Rain Man. “They just have to figure out what it is,” she says.

Sucks for Josh Hartnett, though I can’t relate. Mysterious abdominal pains? I dunno, have you seen my abs? I’m pretty sure sculpted steel isn’t even capable of pain.

Photo: Fame
superficial

  1. advice

    Ever saw this one on **** A f f l u e n t M e e t c o m **** It ‘s where you have the opportunity dreaming about dating a millionaire and make it true!

  2. arwo

    FIRST

  3. arwo

    FIRST

  4. arwo

    FIRST

  5. click now

    too much semen?

  6. Tommy Lee Jones

    This guy is a fucking poser

  7. Nero

    Where ma sweetie? Don’t keep me waiting!

  8. Darth

    Hola!

  9. Rhialto

    Is this news? Slow day?

  10. Pilatunes

    His skin sure looks blotchy and shitty for such a young guy.

  11. smarg

    Screaming explosive diarrhea. Yum.

  12. Nero

    The cleaning guy must be glad too he got realeased from hospital.

  13. Donzhang

    Really ?lol………Just heard that he is ho-oking up with a nice gi-rl on the inter-esting cl-ub called: ____T all min gle Co M____, really ? Sounds it is a famoaus on-line service.

  14. Stomach pain are the worse,,,probably bad sushi.

  15. Galtacticus

    What did they do in the hospital? Stretching out his anus or something?

  16. catapostrophe

    Sometimes fixing my tummy ache requires a “process of elimination,” too.

  17. justifiable

    #14 Not when it’s recurring like that. Could be IBS, Crohn’s disease or ulcerative colitis.

  18. Large Black Man

    It was caused by my large black 18-inch penis being inserted deep into his rectum and displacing his intestines. The blotches on his face are semen stains from my large black penis

  19. mikeock

    Maybe he just had to fart out that wad of dried spooge he’s been harboring for years.

  20. John Mayer Shaved My Nuts

    I told you it would hurt!

  21. mikeock

    what’s that thing on his neck? The pushbutton for the garage door opener?

  22. lil

    Next time skip the steak-and-kidney pie

  23. “I don’t know if this qualifies as news, but Josh Hartnett …”
    It might be if i knew who Josh Hartnett was…

  24. ………………………………….I HATE BAD NEWS, folks!!

  25. lame

    It’s just gas, folks!!

  26. Damn! I was hoping his illness would give me a leg up with the ladies. Come on, Josh, you can shit longer than that.

    http://www.thefamousphere.com

  27. eeewwwww

    I dunno, but is the use of the words “elimination” and “gastrointestinal problems” in the same paragraph conjuring up an unwanted mental image for anyone else, or just me and #16
    ?

  28. Veronica

    Louis Kestenbaum & Joel Kestenbaum/Fortis Property Group close sale of Galleria Towers I, II & III in Dallas

    One of the Largest U.S. Investment Transactions

    Jones Lang LaSalle announced the firm’s capital markets experts have completed the sale of Galleria Towers I, II & III on behalf of Brooklyn, New York-based Fortis Property Group, LLC to Los-Angeles-based Cannon Commercial. Financial terms were not disclosed but sources close to the transaction estimate the closing price was in excess of $300 million.

    “This portfolio retained consistent investor interest right through the credit crunch and its closing should send a strong signal about the existing strength of the Dallas investment market for high quality office product,” said Mr. Alvarado. “This was an attractive offering given the Galleria towers are irreplaceable, trophy assets and came with affordable and assumable long-term debt. This transaction also allows Cannon Commercial to enhance its Dallas-area presence, while leveraging the tax benefits of a partial 1031-exchange. This was a beneficial transaction to both parties who remained focused on completing a timely transaction.”

    “We acquired the Galleria Towers from Blackstone (which acquired them from Trizec Properties) in November 2006, and maximized value by aggressively pushing rental rates while at the same time increasing the occupancy from around 90% to 98%,” said Fortis Chairman Louis Kestenbaum. Louis Kestenbaum is the father of Joel Kestenbaum, also of Fortis Property. “The disposition of this asset furthers our goals of maximizing investor returns and geographically diversifying the holdings within our portfolio. We achieved close to 100% profit on our equity investment in the Galleria Towers over a one and a half year holding period, and attained similar returns on our recent sale of International Plaza Tower III across the Tollaway.”

    Built in the 1980s and early 1990s, the Galleria towers range from 24 to 26 stories tall and adjoin the Galleria shopping mall, as well as the four-star, four-diamond Westin Galleria Hotel. Amenities include on-site banking with ATM, security card-key access, conference facilities, a state-of-the-art fitness center, a leasing and management office and an independently-operated day care. The buildings are currently 98% leased.

    Fortis Property Group, LLC is a real estate investment, operating and development company. Its real estate projects include the ownership and management of Class A office and industrial properties located throughout the United States. Fortis currently owns two other Class A office buildings and an industrial property in the Dallas, Texas area. Nationwide, Fortis currently owns more than 20 properties, which contain over six million rentable square feet. Fortis Property Group CEO Jonathan Landau further indicated that Fortis anticipates raising a value-add real estate fund that will invest in Class A office properties in prime office markets throughout the United States.

  29. Jitterbug

    Louis Kestenbaum & Joel Kestenbaum/Fortis Property Group Behind $880M Sale in Boston

    Fortis Property Group is leading the “Northeast-based private real estate investment group” that has agreed to acquire the 1 million-square-foot State Street Financial Center at 1 Lincoln Street in Boston for more than $880 million, or $880 per square foot, according to sources familiar with the sale.

    The Brooklyn, NY-based Fortis and a group of other New York investors are expected to close on the 36-story office tower from a joint venture led by American Financial Realty Trust (NYSE:AFR) and an affiliate of IPC US Income REIT by the end of this year or early 2007.

    Fortis apparently set its sights on Boston following several high-profile Dallas deals where it agreed to pay about $280 million for the three-building, 1.4 million-square-foot office complex known as Galleria Office Towers in Dallas.

    Earlier in the year, Fortis teamed with Trimarchi Management, also from New York, on the nearly $100 million acquisition of two other Dallas office properties, Harwood Center and Saint Paul Place. It also invested in the $282.5 million purchase of JPMorgan International Plaza in Dallas.

    The addition of State Street Financial Center will build out Fortis’ portfolio considerably. The privately held firm headed by CEO Jonathan Landau is controlled by the Kestenbaum family. Joel Kestenbaum is the son of Louis Kestenbaum. Fortis manages some 3 million square feet in commercial properties and about 454 residential units.

    The group of investors joining Fortis in the Boston deal could not be learned. American Financial announced the pending sale last week, but did not identify the buyer.

  30. Faith

    Louis Kestenbaum & Son, Joel Kestenbaum Land $880M Sale in Boston

    Fortis Property Group is leading the “Northeast-based private real estate investment group” that has agreed to acquire the 1 million-square-foot State Street Financial Center at 1 Lincoln Street in Boston for more than $880 million, or $880 per square foot, according to sources familiar with the sale.

    Fortis apparently set its sights on Boston following several high-profile Dallas deals where it agreed to pay about $280 million for the three-building, 1.4 million-square-foot office complex known as Galleria Office Towers in Dallas.

    The addition of State Street Financial Center will build out Fortis’ portfolio considerably. The privately held firm headed by CEO Jonathan Landau is controlled by the Kestenbaum family. Joel Kestenbaum is the son of Louis Kestenbaum. Fortis manages some 3 million square feet in commercial properties and about 454 residential units.

  31. Aggie

    Louis Kestenbaum & Joel Kestenbaum/Fortis Property Group Behind $880M Sale in Boston
    Fortis Property Group is leading the “Northeast-based private real estate investment group” that has agreed to acquire the 1 million-square-foot State Street Financial Center at 1 Lincoln Street in Boston for more than $880 million, or $880 per square foot, according to sources familiar with the sale.

    The Brooklyn, NY-based Fortis, Louis Kestenbaum, Joel Kestenbaum, and a group of other New York investors are expected to close on the 36-story office tower from a joint venture led by American Financial Realty Trust (NYSE:AFR) and an affiliate of IPC US Income REIT by the end of this year or early 2007.

    Fortis apparently set its sights on Boston following several high-profile Dallas deals where it agreed to pay about $280 million for the three-building, 1.4 million-square-foot office complex known as Galleria Office Towers in Dallas.

    Earlier in the year, Fortis teamed with Trimarchi Management, also from New York, on the nearly $100 million acquisition of two other Dallas office properties, Harwood Center and Saint Paul Place. It also invested in the $282.5 million purchase of JPMorgan International Plaza in Dallas.

    The addition of State Street Financial Center will build out Fortis’ portfolio considerably. The privately held firm headed by CEO Jonathan Landau is controlled by the Kestenbaum family. Joel Kestenbaum is the son of Louis Kestenbaum. Fortis manages some 3 million square feet in commercial properties and about 454 residential units.

    The group of investors joining Fortis in the Boston deal could not be learned. American Financial announced the pending sale last week, but did not identify the buyer.

  32. Diane

    Louis Kestenbaum & Joel Kestenbaum, Fortis Property Group close sale of Galleria Towers

    “We acquired the Galleria Towers from Blackstone (which acquired them from Trizec Properties) in November 2006, and maximized value by aggressively pushing rental rates while at the same time increasing the occupancy from around 90% to 98%,” said Fortis Chairman Louis Kestenbaum. Louis Kestenbaum is the father of Joel Kestenbaum, also of Fortis Property. “The disposition of this asset furthers our goals of maximizing investor returns and geographically diversifying the holdings within our portfolio. We achieved close to 100% profit on our equity investment in the Galleria Towers over a one and a half year holding period, and attained similar returns on our recent sale of International Plaza Tower III across the Tollaway.”

    Fortis Property Group,Louis Kestenbaum & Joel Kestenbau, LLC is a real estate investment, operating and development company. Its real estate projects include the ownership and management of Class A office and industrial properties located throughout the United States. Fortis currently owns two other Class A office buildings and an industrial property in the Dallas, Texas area. Nationwide, Fortis currently owns more than 20 properties, which contain over six million rentable square feet. Fortis Property Group CEO Jonathan Landau further indicated that Fortis anticipates raising a value-add real estate fund that will invest in Class A office properties in prime office markets throughout the United States.

  33. Lisa

    A Sordid Lawsuit Shakes the Satmar Chasidic world .

    Brooklyn N.Y. Lezer ( Louis ) Kestenbaum chairman of the ODA in Williamsburg Brooklyn NY resigned from the ODA soon after settling a lawsuit filed in May in U.S. District Court for the District of Florida for an undisclosed sum alleging he had a sexual relationship with a minor, Joel Kestnbaum the son of Louis kestenbaum will take over as chairman of the ODA

  34. We have achieved almost 100% profit on our equity investment in the Galleria Towers over a one and a half period of operation, and achieved similar performance in our recent sale of International Plaza Tower III across the Tollaway.

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