Jon Gosselin’s mediocre trim parade is back on!

February 17th, 2010 // 29 Comments

Because what’s the point of having eight children if they can’t get you laid and rich? Jon Gosselin and TLC settled their respective lawsuits today. The details of the settlement were confidential but he should be balls deep in sloppy America snizz in however much time it takes to exploit a small Asian child. E! News reports:

And by the sound of it, the deal not only will allow Kate Gosselin to resume her reality antics with an in-the-works spinoff show, but it seems to pave the way for the octodad also to make a return to TV.
“TLC has reached a settlement with Jon Gosselin and will be undertaking procedural steps to conclude the litigation. All terms of the settlement are confidential. The whole Gosselin family remain under contract with TLC.”

So when do we find out Jon signed over legal custody of his children to TLC? Or are they saving for that Christmas special when he tells Kate? “Wait, if you signed over your custody during the settlement, and I signed over my custody to get you kicked off the show, then that means… Ohmygod WE’RE FREE! Screw the divorce, do me under the tree, Jon! I put on some holiday weight the way you like it.”

….

Why did I just write erotic Gosselin fiction back there? No, wait, don’t answer that. Some stones are better left unturned.

Photos: Splash News
superficial

  1. mnsuperbee

    When I die I want to come back as Jon Gosselin.

  2. katie

    shes actually looking good here, surprisingly/

  3. Jimmy

    Both of these individuals are bottom feeders!

  4. katie

    shes actually looking good here, surprisingly/

  5. Ego

    great, the Gosselin’s & TLC made The Baby Jesus cry. FAIL

  6. John

    God, she makes Courtney Hole (Love) look hot…

  7. anonymoose

    smoking makes you ugly.

    lighting up is just one more bad decision by jon gosselin.

  8. you

    damn these two people are exactly why people want to blow up america

  9. Jake_Ryan

    God I think she’s sexy. I’d pound her like free beer.

  10. pimp

    she needs her asshole just destroyed…

  11. havoc

    God, the bars are full of divorced bimbos like this. The good news is they’ll fuck anything…..

    .

  12. kim

    Shes chewing her gum like a cow!

  13. Carolyn

    I hear his cigarette is longer than his dick.

  14. DJS

    Kate is smoking hot, no doubt about it.

  15. GeorgeWBush

    uh, who’s the PIMP she’s walking with – shots don’t show his face

  16. We need to stop giving air time to these news. I do not care, and I know a lot of other people who could care less. Let them make a mess of their lives, and get those children OUT of the spotlight.

  17. I can’t comment on this book specifically because I haven’t read it, but anybody with any connection, however small, to the entertainment or publishing industry can publish a memior these days and they are all starting to blend in together. If every minor celbrity with a disfunctional childhood or an beloved dead pet/child/spouse can publish, why can’t Kate? Buy it or don’t buy it, but don’t blame her for treading a very well worn path.

  18. Doc Schweinstrudel

    For once they both dressed normally.

  19. kaly123

    Who cares!!! My boyfriend thinks the same with me. He- is eight years older than me, lol. We met online at- Agemingle @ co–m a nice and free site for Younger- Women and Older Men, or Older Women and Younger Men, to- interact with each other. Maybe you wanna check out or- tell your friends.

  20. Rough on ice

    Yeah this is all gravy, but this wont work for me unless he keep Milo as his spiritual adviser…

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  22. whoprey

    Who cares!!! My boyfriend thinks the same with me. He is eight years older than me, lol. We met online at====== Agelessmatch.com ====== a nice and free site for Younger Women and Older Men, or Older Women and Younger Men, to interact with each other. Maybe you wanna check out or- tell your friends.

  23. FAKE KHATE

    WRONG- THE ONLY PARENT EXPLOITING A CHILD (8) IS FAKE ASS KHATE!

  24. I do not care, and I know a lot of other people who could care less. Let them make a mess of their lives, and get those children OUT of the spotlight.

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