Jon Gosselin signed hand-written legal contract with Kate Major. Of course, he did.

November 18th, 2009 // 23 Comments

Presumably drunk on homely snizz, Jon Gosselin signed a hand-written contract with former Star reporter Kate Major in exchange for her keeping their relationship secret. RadarOnline reports:

“I, Jon Gosselin, will employ Kate Major as a personal assistant,” Jon wrote on the document dated July 28, 2009. Jon pledged that she could handle “some but not all future accounts” in a paragraph notable for its scratched out section.
And in language that just begs for a lawyer somewhere to hear a cash register ringing, Jon writes: “She will receive a percentage of accounts for payment based upon involvement.”

Jesus Christ. So basically Jon Gosselin married Kate Major. The sex stopped and she’s walking away with half his cash. There’s really no other way to describe what happened here.

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Comments (23)

  1. FIRST FIRST FIRST | November 18, 2009 at 1:26 pm

    I RULE!!! #1 BABY!!!

    Reply
  2. Björn K. | November 18, 2009 at 1:26 pm

    Yay! :)

    Reply
  3. dumdum | November 18, 2009 at 1:35 pm

    That look on her face, uck. She looks like she’s a huge bitch.

    Reply
  4. He's a loser | November 18, 2009 at 1:38 pm

    How lame. Some guys will sign anything to fuck a woman. Jon has no game.

    Reply
  5. Lulz | November 18, 2009 at 1:54 pm

    Looks like someone played their cards right.

    Reply
  6. Dave ain't here, man | November 18, 2009 at 1:57 pm

    I think we should take a moment for sober reflection here, and just say: Bwahahahahahahahaha!

    Reply
  7. the old guy | November 18, 2009 at 2:11 pm

    Good luck trying to enforce the terms of this “contract.”

    This brings the word “vague” to a new high (low?).

    Reply
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  9. Rick James | November 18, 2009 at 2:24 pm

    Cocaine is a hell of a drug…

    Reply
  10. Hiya | November 18, 2009 at 2:27 pm

    How much money is she really gonna get with him and his 8 kids to support? She is thinking that he is more than a passing joke.

    Reply
  11. DayShifter | November 18, 2009 at 2:48 pm

    LOL!! Good luck enforcing that. Just seen a judge throw out a similar document on court TV.

    Reply
  12. JADE | November 18, 2009 at 3:03 pm

    Just when I think Jon couldn’t be a bigger idiot he goes and proves me wrong again. Man I used to feel sorry for that guy.

    Reply
  13. EricLR | November 18, 2009 at 4:26 pm

    There is just one problem: That “contract” doesn’t have a chance of holding up in anything remotely resembling a real court of law (not that that ever stopped anyone from suing before).

    Reply
  14. Bum | November 18, 2009 at 4:34 pm

    Im a girl but… BUTTERFACE

    Reply
  15. Jamie Lynn's Uterus | November 18, 2009 at 9:25 pm

    This bitch is pig ugly. But, Gosselin loves this type of used up worn out skank.

    The only contract was when he boned this ugly bitch and she ‘contracted’ crabs.

    Reply
  16. xxWPxx | November 19, 2009 at 12:05 pm

    I bet when it says “signed” he rolled his dick on an ink pad and slapped the paper with it. Kate can verify it later.

    Reply
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  20. r4i | December 11, 2009 at 12:29 am

    Hi guy’s,
    I think Jon couldn’t be a bigger idiot he goes and proves me wrong again.

    Reply
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