Jon Gosselin & Michael Lohan: BFFs 4 Life

Jon Gosselin and Michael Lohan spent the weekend in the Hamptons together where, like any good friend, Mike used the opportunity to get his face in the press by giving interviews. Here he is in People revealing Jon wants to be friends with Kate Gosselin and isn’t dating anyone at the moment:

“He would love to be friends with her,” says Lohan, the estranged father of Lindsay Lohan, who’s been showing Gosselin around the Hamptons and and who has become an unlikely advisor. “They had eight kids and he would like to work things out the right way and just be friends.”
“A lot of opportunities are opening up for him,” Lohan says of his friend, referring to possible endorsement deals.
Lohan also says Gosselin is in a good mood these days. “He’s fantastic and upbeat and said that he just wanted to concentrate on his kids and his career and his life,” he said. “It’s overwhelming for him but he’s handling it.
As for for Gosselin’s gal pal Hailey Glassman and the former Star magazine reporter Gosselin’s been spotted with, Kate Major, “he’s not with either one right now,” Lohan reports.
“He’s not concentrating on a relationship with any woman. He just wants to take a step back and deal with his family and his kids.”

Jesus. It’s almost like Jon Gosselin wants to get his ass handed to him during the custody proceedings. Just take a look at the people’s he’s been seen with since the divorce:

Michael Lohan: Ex-con. One half of the shitstorm that created Lindsay Lohan.
Kate Major: High-priced hooker turned star-fucking tabloid reporter.
Hailey Glassman: Gang-banging coke fiend with a record.
Christian Audiger: Created Ed Hardy clothing line.

Seriously, it feels like the only people missing from this list are Osama Bin Laden and Britney Spears. Okay, maybe I’m getting carried away. — Just Osama Bin Laden.