Jon Hamm Could Be Waiting At A Bar To Seduce You Right Now

July 25th, 2012 // 22 Comments
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Jon Hamm
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A bunch of you wrote in on this one presumably to see how fast I’ll slap on a dress and put on make-up because I love vagina so much I want to have kids and name them Labia and Majora. Anyway, The Daily reports a possibly-single Jon Hamm is either trolling bars for strange or being remarkably polite to people that walk up to him with breasts:

Hamm first raised eyebrows while visiting Kansas City, Mo., for baseball’s All-Star Game. Flying solo at a Yahoo-sponsored VIP party at CrossroadsKC at Grinders on July 8, he chatted up a hot blonde wearing a sheer shirt — a dead ringer for his absent girlfriend.

Later that week, he got up close and personal with a gorgeous brunette in Rome. Photos from the OCTO The New Architecture of Time by Bulgari dinner on July 13 show Hamm getting handsy with gorgeous Italian actress Anna Safroncik. Westfeldt was nowhere to be seen.
One week later, he was at it again during at night out at Hot Bird in Brooklyn, N.Y., on Thursday, where he was accompanied by a statuesque blonde — again, not Westfeldt. “He didn’t even really want to go out, but I convinced him,” she was overheard bragging at the bar on Monday. Once there, she said, he pounded lagers and “was surprised nobody was coming up to him!”

While that last part sounds suspicious because TV tells me Don Draper is impossibly smooth and everything that happens on it is true, the gender of this next source should really put things into perspective:

Accompanied by fellow actor pals Jon Glaser and Eugene Mirman, Hamm hit on the female bargoers, according to Twitter user @crashnabula. “They had no game either,” he tweeted the next day. “They just bought drinks for every mediocre girl they approached, and the girls dipped after 10 min of convo.”

Translation: “Dude from Mad Men showed up and my GF blew him right in front of me. #YOLO she kept saying the whole time #YOLO”

But in all seriousness, it sounds like Don Draper has switched to full Skarsgard mode, and if this site’s anything, it’s an elaborate alert system letting you know when to freshen up your noonerhole and get on out there. So, I want details, ladies, and not because I’ll hunt you down until you tell me. Haha! Who does that? (Me.)

Photos: Bauer-Griffin, Pacific Coast News, Splash News

superficial

  1. Matt Lauer

    15 minutes since last shave and counting…

  2. Sven Golly

    10 minutes of conversation to get blown? Why is Jon sandbagging?

  3. Crabby Old Guy

    I think he needs to work on his wingmen – yeah, he’s got to be the best looking dude in the group – but man, the drop off can’t be THAT great between him and the other two guys (have you seen them?).

  4. cc

    The one guy who has to sit down and seriously contemplate the question ‘Is it possible to get laid too much?’

  5. Johnny P!

    Hamm will meet Skarsgard in a bar for a ‘boy’s night out’. They’ll be joined a little later by Hemsworth, fresh from the gym, who left the wife and kid at home for some badly needed guy time. Shortly thereafter, Bale will walk in, join them, and still shaken from his visit to Aurora will declare “I need a drink! Drinks are on the house for everybody!”
    And the universe as we know it will implode in a sea of damp panties, and Fish’s tighty-whities.
    It’s simple Quantum Physics…

  6. USDA Prime McBeef

    What is it about Mizzura and the hot dudes, Joh Hamm, Richard McBeef, Brad Pitt, Mark Twain.

    Must be something in the water there.

  7. I just noticed that Friday will be the one-year anniversary of the “Alexander Skarsgard is Single, DTF” post. Maybe this will start a trend: at the end of every July, another hot, hot actor notices all the summery, scantily-clad poon he’s not having, leaves his long-time girlfriend, and hits the scene, banging everyone in sight. Last year, Skarsgard; this year, Hamm; next year, Fassbender.

  8. KJW

    I sure hope Jon Hamm is waiting in a bar to hit on me. He’s hot.

  9. all

    he looks like a sleaze.

  10. Muffin

    he looks a little cokey. party time!

  11. Edg

    There’s no other in the whole MilkyWay that is as handsome as Jon If i ever happen to meet him I’l just him all my lovin’

  12. Cock Dr

    Line up the shots Jon….we’ll drink and get to the bottom of your current relationship status.

  13. I hope he is really single. I would love to rub my man boobs all over his face.

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