Folks, We’ve Got A Jon Hamm’s Penis Sighting

October 23rd, 2012 // 58 Comments

Wanna get lost in your mind for a while? Ask yourself who the water bottle’s for.

Earlier today on Facebook, one of the few Southern Republicans I actually like commented that because I posted about Kim Kardashian, I owe the ladies some Hamm-bone which I was going to point out is entirely up to the universe and out of my control. Except apparently it isn’t because moments ago these magically appeared, so at this time I’d like it if all the world leaders would join together in officially declaring me Supreme Penis Conjurer before I’m swayed to use my powers for evil. *turns Guam into a dick* You have 48 hours.

Photos: Bauer-Griffin

superficial

  1. EricLr

    You know, some day he and Skargaard are going to battle, reawaken Gozer, and destroy us all.

  2. giu

    Genius.

  3. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    There once was a man named John Hamm.
    Who approached and said, “Howdy ma’am.”
    His pants showed his head,
    And he motioned and said,
    “Let me slide into your clam.”

  4. oh i know

    thank you, thank you, THANK YOU Fish!! i LOVE this man & his hamm-bone!!!

  5. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    T-Rex Jon Hamm cannot adjust his peener.

  6. now he’s just walking around with a fake dick in his pants…

  7. Ruth

    Thanks Fish!

  8. Jon Hamm Penis
    henry hill
    Commented on this photo:

    oh, now he’s just showing off!

  9. “Me? Just taking the (hot)dog for a walk”.

  10. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    I’m wetter than an Otter’s pocket right now…

  11. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    Ball squidge!

  12. Damnit, if Georgio is limericking, then I’m Haikuing my 17 syllables:

    The Kraken sleeps
    behind John Hamm’s zipper
    soon it will be awoken

  13. Schweddy Snatch

    I’m betting a Hamm-boner results in him going full-retard.

  14. Inner Retard

    Why is everyone so infatuated with this guy’s dick?! It’s average size at best… for a horse.

  15. Jon Hamm Penis
    Elle Diabla
    Commented on this photo:

    Mashed potatoes

  16. Does John Hamm dress to the right? No, but his potato does.

  17. Jon Hamm Penis
    Oz Matters
    Commented on this photo:

    Hamm and scrambled eggs.

  18. Jon Hamm Penis
    Bionic_Crouton
    Commented on this photo:

    He just carries around the water bottle to give people a size comparison.

  19. Sheppy

    Weirdo… Dresses to the right.

  20. Jon Hamm Penis
    Crickette
    Commented on this photo:

    Good grief. He totes rubs himself before he steps outsides. I’m not complaining, though. Momma like.

  21. Jon Hamm Penis
    Crickette
    Commented on this photo:

    *outside

  22. Douche

    Now this is what I come here for; quality shots of peen. Well done sir.

  23. Jon Hamm Penis
    neo
    Commented on this photo:

    OH NO! NOT AGAIN!! It boggles the mind!! (pro tip: briefs not boxers, you Jew!!)

    • Whaaa? Jon Hamm is not Jewish. Where did you even get that idea?* I mean, even his last name is trayf.

      *Is it because he’s circumcised? Most American men are, Jewish or not.

  24. Sandoucheky

    The Jon Hamm dick saga on here is so fucking hilarious. I loled hard at the headline

  25. Jonesy

    Put some goddamned underwear on, Christmas Hamm! I want my fucking wife back!

  26. Jon Hamm Penis
    Nique
    Commented on this photo:

    Nice, something for the girls at last ;)

  27. Mandzuz

    I’d sit in his lap

  28. Jon Hamm Penis
    EZ-B
    Commented on this photo:

    tt’s like when it swings to the right he’s go to hold something to counter-balance in his let.

  29. ash

    what is WRONG with this guy!?

  30. Jon Hamm Penis
    Jen
    Commented on this photo:

    I am not getting sick of the Hamm sightings. Christmas has come early.

  31. Jon Hamm Penis
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    Those trousers are so thin that you can actually tell that the dude wearing them is circumsized (and you don’t even need the zoom thingy to see it!). Boggles my mind. Seriously.

  32. Jon Hamm Penis
    Little Tongue
    Commented on this photo:

    Well there’s the dick head again…

  33. Helena Handbasket

    I’m getting spoiled with all this bulging goodness. Now I want to see full erection. Fish? Please?

  34. Jon Hamm Penis
    Jentilly
    Commented on this photo:

    He should just let it out to get some air…

  35. Jon Hamm Penis
    Truk
    Commented on this photo:

    Don’t go full retard.

  36. The guy puts his pant on one huge cock at a time like everyone else with a huge cock. Whats the big deal?

  37. lori

    Uggh I cannot stand this man. He’s not at all attractive to me.

  38. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    Just have your cock hold the bag.

  39. Buddy The Elf

    FAIL on the StL hat.

  40. Jon Hamm Penis
    CuriousTroll
    Commented on this photo:

    Dude, please. Stop showing your dick ffs.

  41. zomgbie

    u know after the first hamm dick pics hit the web his management team went crazy and bought him about a dozen more pants stuffers to wear when he goes out.

  42. Gary Grant

    You can’t stop the Hamm-ster but only try to contain it.

  43. SFRowGuy

    Jon needs to take that thing out for walks more often.

  44. Jon Hamm Penis
    lilgrandma
    Commented on this photo:

    not big enough for kim yet lmao!!! and she likes BLACKS ones anyways!!! she is white trash!! and he got better taste than that!!!

  45. Jon Hamm Penis
    cardsfan
    Commented on this photo:

    forget the penis…he’s a Cardinals fan!!!

  46. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    So he’s a right-y tight-y?! LOL!

  47. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    id say the person taking the pics is a gay phuck..

  48. Jon Hamm Penis
    Commented on this photo:

    Omg omg, I am freaking out, it seems like he’s only got big low hanging balls, the hell with Mad Men!

  49. Jon Hamm Penis
    matt
    Commented on this photo:

    Guys just pull up the pants and let the dicks fall where they may.

  50. Jon Hamm Penis
    FreedomFirst
    Commented on this photo:

    What? I don’t see anything bigger than normal here…pfhhh…

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