Johnny Depp and Vanessa Paradis reportedly split months ago, but then they both spent the time since then either denying it or cleverly hinting at it, so no one knew what the fuck even though he banged an Olsen twin and somehow lived to tell the tale. Except out of nowhere today, Johnny’s publicist just released a statement to ET Online announcing they’ve officially sep- Wait, what do you mean wrong pics? There’s a pirate costume and ev- *looks closer* Goddammit.
Photos: WENN
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Oh, the horrors that poor bodyguard in the background has seen.
The horror…
The horror
??
You’re using pics of John Mayor and gipping us ladies of the chance to stare at a single Johnny Depp!
I think it’s spelled gyp and it’s horribly insensitive to the gypsies that frequent this site.
HEY DID YOU KNOW THAT’S JOHN MAYER? HERP DERP
Johnny Depp, John Mayer…eh, same difference.
Johnny Depp’s penis isn’t racist
How is that he’s deaging into John Meyer?
The look here after fining out Winona Ryder is still single after announcing he is single.
ok i just saw it was not Johnny Depp.
Hahaha!
What’s up with Johnny Depp – I don’t recall him looking this douchey?
Pffft…. LMAO. Right on Fish…
So John Mayer is so broke he has to stand in for that pirate chocolate, whatever…. douchebag…whatever. Ok, anyway, who do I talk to so I get my money for that photo I brought in for this nonsense ?…
Depp was overheard saying, “Yeah, the gap in Vanessa’s teeth just isn’t as tight as it used to be. Let’s call it ‘irreconcilable differences’.”
No no no, John Mayer is not an acceptable stand-in!
And here I present ya’ll the poor man’s Johny Depp:.. Johny Derp!
I read a blind item about a singer who really looked like an actor. He would use this to fool people on purpose. He actually went so far as to leave small tips at restaurants hoping the actor would get bad press. I bet Superficial has an idea who they are…
Oh God, what happened to Depp’s face!?!?….Oh it’s John Mayer…he’s looking douchey, and like an impersonator.
So long ties are in again.
isn’t that the douche-bag also know as John Meyer?
Come to think of it, i’ve never seen John Mayer and Johnny Depp in the same place at the same time.
He looks like Katy Perry without makeup.
Send for a douche bag, get a colostomy bag. This is why you can’t take vacations, Fish.
It’s time for Johnny to come back down to planet earth and start plowing thru a succession of US starlets.
I can understand the confusion. Both don’t look like they bathe very often, and the music they record kinda sucks…Which is really disappointing since John Mayer’s a decent blues guitarist…But that’s not what the fat chicks want.
Can we get some Johnny Depp pictures and not this ugly fuck?
Is he doing the ‘safety dance’ ?
In every photo there’s a black guy saying “all white people look alike” with his eyes.