Johnny Depp ‘Adopted’ By Comanche Nation

“Wait. For real? Like the baking powder?”

While Johnny Depp may or may not have based part of his Tonto performance on Marilyn Manson, he definitely based it off a painting by an artist who literally just makes up his own Indian outfits because his historical research stops around, “Eh, they probably liked birds.” But surprisingly this was enough to make Johnny Depp an honorary member of the Comanche tribe which he immediately jumped at because, holy shit, has he been talking out his ass about knowing anything about Indians outside of Marlon Brando’s mumblings through a mouthful of food. “Joffy, fa fing you goffa fo afout Findians is fere’s fot fefough futter on fese froisssants.” Via Jezebel:

[L]ast week, LaDonna Harris, a Comanche and president of Americans for Indian Opportunity, invited Depp to join the tribe.
“I reached out, and Johnny was very receptive to the idea,” she told the website Indian Country. He seemed proud to receive the invitation, and we were honored that he so enthusiastically agreed.”
Depp was inducted into the Comanche Nation. According to The Hollywood Reporter:
The ceremony took place at Harris’s home, and Depp gave gifts to the attendees, as per tradition.
“Welcoming Johnny into the family in the traditional way was so fitting,” Harris said. “He’s a very thoughtful human being, and throughout his life and career, he has exhibited traits that are aligned with the values and worldview that Indigenous peoples share.”

So, wait, the values and worldview of Indigenous people are “accessories and layers are your friend?” Because I just assumed it was something way more mystical and awesome like taking on the shape of a bear when you get really mad. Or wildly flapping your arms and cawing like a bird when you lose at blackjack. But, yeah, sure, bandoliers. Those are cool, too, I guess.