Here’s How Johnny Depp Looks Now

This post was originally just about accessories and dead teeth (by my count that’s seven and one, respectively), but when I went looking for a little extra flavor, I came back with something surprising — If you pick on Johnny Depp, he will fuck you up with bricks. Via Page Six:

“I come home from nothing but hillbillies, and my mom said to me, ‘All right, here’s the deal: The next time anybody puts their hands on you, pick up a brick and lay them out.’”

I’m not sure anyone knows why he started talking about how he learned to handle bullying as a child during promotion for Black Mass, and it should probably make me reconsider this whole post, but I’ve already mocked one batshit pinky ring enthusiast today, so why not another? Seriously, are they putting mercury in silk scarves now? Someone needs to tell Nick Cannon.

*puts on helmet* Come at me, Depp.

Johnny Depp Gold Teeth Accessories

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Photo: Getty, Xposure/AKM-GSI