It’s been a month since John Travolta was accused of trying to coerce and/or pay every male massage therapist in the industry to have sex with his butt in a completely heterosexual fashion, so here he is making his first public appearance at The AFI Lifetime Achievement awards last night which more than likely means he’s made peace with the Church of Scientology and all those guys are dead. On that note, I took the liberty of adding captions to all these which I’m pretty sure are close to the actual words that came out of his mouth. They can’t be far off.
Photos: Getty
Aren’t there enough gay Spocks already?
…Never!!!
Nice hair!
I think it’s: “Nice hair, shithead.”
:)
In dracula voice:
“I vant to suck your cock”
OH Goddammit!
Now my comment in the main section just looks stupid.
I’m so stupit!
*bangs head on desk*
Meh. It was as good as it was obvious. I don’t mind seeing it twice.
He was a vampire in a SNL sketch where Renfield turned into a bat and banged travoltas in flight tookus. Suddenly I’m realizing that sketch was a Travolta fantasy.
Looks more like a Vulcan to me. It would only be logical to suck a cock.
… Technically Spock was only half Vulcan–so logically it would be his human side who enjoys a good cocking.
I salute he courage
Dan,
Do you sometimes do drugs? Some of your comments are just off the fucking wall (like this one), but other times you seem perfectly coherent.
If you are doing drugs, I hope its not those bath salts I’ve been hearing about. I heard that will make you chew on homeless peoples’ faces.
…I hear that Fava Beans and Chianti are all the rage when coupled with homeless.
I want to exposed myself
Bingo! See…that’s what I mean. Just fucking completely random shit comes out of you sometimes.
And I really enjoy it BTW.
Is it me or is the church of Scientology a cover for a bunch of homosexual men who won’t come out of the closet: Travolta…Cruise…
Kirstie Alley…
“ewww gross! Something smells like pussy!”
His “hair” looks especially fake here.
They used an ultra fine Sharpie.
“Has everyone watched “Inglorious Bastards”? Because Im going to burn this motherfuckin’ place to the ground with all of you in it.”
bawhahahah!! That was hillarious!!
Mr. Travolta’s hairpiece on loan from the Barnabas Collins collection.
I was thinking he ripped the astroturf off Mauricio in Shallow Hal.
[img]http://www.thesuperficial.com/wp-content/uploads/2012/06/08/001SHA_Jason_Alexander_017-320_181.jpg[/img]
The UV light is a nice touch. (“Oatmeal? Spittle? Semen? This must be where Wilford Brimley was strangled by Bob Crane.”)
Ask him about the pilot…..the one with the firmly toned butt cheeks. Private flying lessons indeed.
Just wait until you see his private landing strip…
Mr. Kotter wouldn’t approve.
He’s showing emotion. He must be a Romulan, then.
Or else he’s just heard there’s an all-male Pon farr.
He looks like a wax statue. But I guess he knows a lot about sex wax.
Butch Patrick is not aging well.
WTF? Isn’t this man wealthy enough to get proper hair plugs?
…or on a boat?
Fans, my man, no one is doubting Travolt’as goodness as a husband or a father. Okay – we are, but that’s not the point. The point, the hilarious point, is that he’s a badly closeted bald gay man with a seemingly endless collection of ridiculous hairpieces who’s holding down a highly fuckable MILF as beard.
In short, what we’re laughing at is his deep and evident state of denial, self-loathing and douchebaggery that aren’t doing the gay community -or the balding guys community, or the Straight Guys Who’s Like a Piece of Kelly Preston’s Ass community- any favors.
Think Neil Patrick Harris.
Think Jason Statham.
Hell, think Tom Ford – guy’s gay and balding, both openly, and cool as hell altogether.
And now tell me what possible reason there could be for this douche’s closet or his idiotic array of hairpieces.
Also, Scientology.
WOW…this picture says a thousand words and none of them flattering.
Dear Lestat,
You have one new picture message from “JT Da V 69″
Regards,
V Harmony
Johnny Depp looks like he gained a lot of weight/wants cock in his ass for the “Dark Shadows” movie.
He actually looks like a Vulcan