John Stamos Has So Much Sex Lesbians Ask Him For Advice

John Stamos is.. is.. have mercy… *gets lost in his eyes for what feels like a thousand years, snaps head away* FOCUS. John Stamos is a known ladies man, and apparently to the point where even lesbians are asking him for advice on sex because he’s featured in a new book “How To F*ck a Woman” written by Sara Gilbert’s ex. Via Page Six:

A couple of women have wanted ‘selfies’ afterwards,” Stamos tells Adler, who he worked with on “The New Normal,” after alluding he sometimes feels used, adding, “One girl really wanted my shirt, like a souvenir.”
Stamos notes: “I’m fifty-one years old. I’ve had some experiences but it’s about listening, asking, talking … Maybe some girls are afraid of communicating. But I find most aren’t if you ask, ‘Does this feel good?’ Or listen to her body like an instrument. I guess I do approach sex in a musical way. With me it’s more rhythm than melody with a woman … but it’s all listening. When music clicks you can feel it. You have to listen to other musicians. With women, you have to listen to their bodies.”

And while all of that sounds intensely erotic to the point where you wish you were a supple harp just waiting for Uncle Jesse to pluck your strings that you get a boner thinking about pussy – FOOTBALL! – let’s not pretend John Stamos’ honest advice wouldn’t be, “I shove my dick in and out of them until I ejaculate, then give them however many souvenirs it takes to not get stabbed.” Think of it as a variation on Derek Jeter, but without the forethought of already having baskets ready because John Stamos is like jazz. Smooth, unpredictable jazz… how is it so hot in here? It’s snowing out!

Photo: Getty

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