Joe Simpson to manage Britney Spears?

April 25th, 2007 // 30 Comments
britney-spears-abs-millennium.jpg

According to an inside source, Jessica Simpson’s dad, Joe Simpson, is considering managing Britney Spears and even tried to set up a meeting with her over the weekend. Although I thought he only liked managing his daughters. And by “managing” I mean “trying to have sex with.” Has this guy done anything for their careers other than stand in the background of all their photos and look creepy? I guess he did get Jessica Simpson those Pizza Hut commercials. Seriously, my coffee maker could probably do a better job.

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Comments (30)

  1. Nsomniac | April 25, 2007 at 7:00 am

    Wait, she still has a career? I thought we called what she does a “lady of the night”. FRIST

    Reply
  2. NicotineEyePatch | April 25, 2007 at 7:02 am

    Managing careers is the new black. Did I say black? I meant the new titty-fuck.

    Reply
  3. HerpesHilton | April 25, 2007 at 7:02 am

    It’s not like he could do any worse for Britney than where is she now.

    Reply
  4. gunit2074 | April 25, 2007 at 7:20 am

    if i was joe….i would try and have a foursome wit brit jess and ash

    Reply
  5. Hecubus | April 25, 2007 at 7:26 am

    This deal will fall through, the only person I see actually managing Britney in the future will be Joe Francis.

    Reply
  6. no1justminda | April 25, 2007 at 7:34 am

    Nice one #5!!!!

    Reply
  7. bungoone | April 25, 2007 at 7:37 am

    wouldn’t he have to be offered the job first in order to “consider” it. what a fucktard. like he’s doing britney any favors. get over yourself Joe!

    Reply
  8. jrzmommy♠ | April 25, 2007 at 7:45 am

    So, by “setting up a meeting”…..does that mean he hung out in a tree taking pictures of her undressing?

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  9. cacw | April 25, 2007 at 7:48 am

    mwahahahaahahaahahaha #2

    Reply
  10. xXrebeccaXx | April 25, 2007 at 7:58 am

    God what is she thinking!?!?! She’s been this crazy bald-headed, cowboy boot wearing lunatic for all this time…..so to get her life/career back on track she’s considering Joe Simpson the incestual manager?

    Reply
  11. Superfish | April 25, 2007 at 7:59 am

    oh he’d be a WONDERFUL manager. and by wonderful, i mean tragic. she’d turn doing Burger King commercials once again ruining that “nice body” of hers. That’s just what the world needs. another fat restaurant pig.

    Reply
  12. tits_on_snack | April 25, 2007 at 8:10 am

    Oh, so she can turn into a fat orange ass-chin chimpanzee too?

    Reply
  13. whitegold | April 25, 2007 at 8:18 am

    He’s such a creepy perv! And highly untalented. So given BS’s choice of men, he should be perfect for her, right?

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  14. F-Sucker | April 25, 2007 at 8:19 am

    Maybe he’s Britney’s next husband.

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  15. the chicken | April 25, 2007 at 8:39 am

    The most important question is, does he know how to accept a real woman’s love?

    Reply
  16. DancingQueen | April 25, 2007 at 8:41 am

    So by “managing” her he means having sex with her like he did with his daughters?

    Reply
  17. lambman | April 25, 2007 at 9:02 am

    Yep, because what Britney needs is a reality TV show and a lip synching scandal….BEST MANAGER EVER

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  18. BarbyGurrl | April 25, 2007 at 9:16 am

    I bet that when it is discovered that this really ISN’T true, he’ll do an “Aw Shucks” face and start doing a hoe down dance

    Reply
  19. DrPhowstus | April 25, 2007 at 9:27 am

    Am I the only one who didn’t buy the flip out/ rehab thing? I mean c’mon… she went for lyposuction and body sculpting. All that other mess was the workings of a pretty fucking smart publicist intent on showing her miraculous rebound.

    That said, the Simpson girls must have assholes the size of beer cans at this point. And you know the old saying “No matter how hot some chick is, somewhere, some guy is sick of fucking her.

    Reply
  20. krbcan | April 25, 2007 at 9:33 am

    While Joe has somehow managed to make careers for his no-talent daughters, they seem to follow his instructions. Britney seems too rebellious right now, and I cant see her taking direction from anyone for a while until she really hits rock-bottom, and realizes she is too stupid to be making any career decisions by herself. I think Joe would give up very quickly if he was to take Britney on right now.

    Reply
  21. Nsomniac | April 25, 2007 at 9:54 am

    Their first order of business will be getting their fuck on. It’s a good talking point for Joel. He can tell everyone “she’s like a daughter to me”.

    Reply
  22. MrTom | April 25, 2007 at 10:02 am

    Anyone else read that as “Joe Simpson to MARRY Britney Spears?”

    I suppose I’m used to seeing that word next to her name.

    Reply
  23. Truthseeker013 | April 25, 2007 at 1:14 pm

    Wouldn’t she be kinda *old* for him?

    Reply
  24. wowzers | April 25, 2007 at 1:16 pm

    yessssss britney is getting her sexy abs back!!!! She is gonna be a hotttie again in no time!

    Reply
  25. crazycowlady | April 25, 2007 at 4:34 pm

    For a minute there, I thought it read “Joe Simpson massaging Britney Spears”. Wouldn’t have surprised me either.

    Reply
  26. pookiedoo | April 25, 2007 at 5:03 pm

    Omigod, I had no idea Joe was Britney’s father, too… Why else would he want to fuck, er, “manage” her?

    Reply
  27. WTFiswrongwithUppl | April 25, 2007 at 7:41 pm

    LMMFAO 15!

    Reply
  28. krazihottkelli | April 26, 2007 at 5:16 am

    Hey Plowshit–still stuck up chickens ass? Heard about what happeded at the rest-stop bathroom..what assholes!

    Reply
  29. krazihottkelli | April 29, 2007 at 1:31 pm

    Yea, Joe Simpson manageing anyone is a career in the trash can…get a real job…

    Reply
  30. hot Beyonce Gwen stefani jessica alba paris hilton britney spears hollywood actresses wallpapers new | September 20, 2007 at 7:50 am

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