Joe Simpson likes to photograph his daughters

September 20th, 2006 // 105 Comments


    Wow…look at the jugs on that one.

  2. boobiezmagee

    What’s up with her hair?


    stupid eye infection. ugh.

  4. Italian Stallion

    I hear he likes giving them the ATM also…….

    Can’t wait to see the porn, I mean home movies……………

  5. lisad71

    This just gives ole Papa Perv Simpson a reason to take pics of his daughters jugs. He masturbates to each photo and whichever ones makes him cum in less than sixty seconds are the ones he has published.

  6. pinky_nip

    I’m just waiting for The Simpson’s off-broadway show, The Aristocrats.

  7. 4 – Stallion
    ATM ?
    Rectum To Piehole??

  8. InstantAsshat-AddFame

    What a greedy asshat. “Control how his daughters are seen in the media.” How’s that? By making sure HE’S the only one making money off them?

    Can you imagine growing up under a control freak like this? No wonder those girls are such a mess.

  9. jrzmommy

    is the mother unconscious all the time or something? Have the words, “Joe, you sick fuck!” EVER been spoken at their house….once even?

  10. Italian Stallion

    @7 Or Ass To Mouth, same difference………..

  11. Maybe Lohan’s dad has a second career about to happen along the same lines…

  12. Joe: “This is when Jessica was frollicking on the beach”

    “This is when she is kissing her new boyfriend”

    “This one is when they are secretly making out”

    “This one is with the See-thru nightie”

    “And Ashlee? How’d that get in there??”

    WireImage: “Dude, you’re creeping us out a little. We’ll take ‘em, but…you’re weird!”



  14. RichPort

    As someone who constantly insults her and is nauseated to the point of Exorcist-like propulsion by her family’s unformfortably close bond, I am thoroughly embarassed and ashamed of my raging hard on right now.

  15. RichPort

    Her boobs are affecting my typing, since only one hand is on the keyboard…

  16. For the sake of tradition and all that is decent, remember that a true gentleman does not ever, under any circumstances, go ass to mouth.

    This is the funniest thing ever:

  17. Foxbase Alpha

    Heard that he gives them baths right before bedtime, too.

  18. jrzmommy

    Whos boobs are bigger—her’s or Scarlett’s?

  19. A2ROX

    definitely scarjo’s b/c scar doesn’t have to wear pushup bras to give them extra volume.

  20. DiabetesExplosion

    I don’t get it. So he loves his daugthers. That’s not so bad, is it? I remember when my dad used to search for gnomes in my chocolate starfish with his tongue and fingers when I was young. Thank god he uses his salami now, it works much better. Although he can’t seem to find any gnomes.

  21. Samuel L. Jackson

    I can’t tell if that is Ashlee or Jessica their tits are in the way…

  22. clamofdeath

    papa joe can release all the photos he wants. he knows they’ll never get any of the money shots burned in his retinas.

  23. Kim

    Good Job Jess! Ride the boots-over-jeans trend right into the ground. I think those are the same boots that she was wearing when she was “food shopping” but in grey. At least she lost some of the post-Nick weight.

  24. Ashley is lucky. Sounds like in THAT family it was better to be the ugly kid….kept Papa Joe out of your bedroom.

  25. camabron

    Those are some massive tits on the first picture !! Are they natural ?

  26. Joe should be trying to pop out a few more kids so he can leech off of them.

  27. Onenewshoe

    Great now my tongue is hard…….Lovely tits, the perfect size. Wished I could lay my face on em’. Keep snappin’ pictures dad.

  28. @16- Hey Ferret, who says we’re gentleman?

    Dirty Sanchez anyone?

    P.S. Help me out over at Ninjas.

  29. Didn’t Joe Simpson used to be an internet-ordained minister? Why’s he acting like a Jew? Go ahead and exploit every last money-grubbing cent off your offspring, Joey-baby. Watch him offer to snap the inevitable Playboy pictorial when Jess and Ashlee’s careers stall. He’ll claim such a provacative spread will be best handled by their daddy. Kidding aside, does anyone not think we’re going to get an incest-laden tell-all in the future? Joe Simpson is the vanilla Joe Jackson. Oh, and regardless of what you think of her, Jess does have some bodacious ta-tas.

  30. commissioner

    My daddy never talked about my boobs. I am certain he never fantasized about me sexually.

    I was clearly neglected.

  31. This guy seems like an overly controlling, obsessed, business focused dad who has forgotten that they are his daughters and not a commodity.

  32. I’m with jrzmommy. What a pervert. Sick, sick, sick.

  33. jrzmommy

    Commish: are you seeing a therapist? Who ARE these people who raise their children in normal, non-sexually dysfunctional households? Son of bitch.

  34. jane's eyre

    @30 ha ha ha, good one.

    What a sick pervert. What’s weird is that Jessica isn’t doing anything to stop him. Guess she thinks that’s normal father/daughter behavior. Seriously, I haven’t ever heard her address the issue.

  35. thesarahficial

    he’s a supafreak! SUPAFREAK!

  36. ToiletDuck

    I am ok with this – really…

    C’mon Joe, here are some ideas –

    1. Jess and Ashlee gettin’ it on – a little incestuous adventure…
    2. A Jess and Ashlee calendar – each month they take a little more clothes off, and by December they are performing cunnilingus on each other…
    3. Jess and/or Ashlee going potty…(now, not when they were toddlers…)
    4. Jess and Ashlee doing a threesome, possibly with Nick, since his career is now going south faster than Jesse Metcalfe’s and he could probably use the work…

    The possibilities are ENDLESS – so Papa Joe, show us the money (shots)..

  37. jrzmommy

    Is the dad at least hot?

  38. hav-a-tampa

    look at that Nose! man she needs a nose job. that nose is outgrowing her face.

  39. jrzmommy

    I mean, if the dad looks like…..say…. Fabio Cannavaro, then he should be allowed to take all the photos he wants and the world should get off his back. Okay? But if the dad looks like Ted Kennedy or Sam Donaldson, however, then he is clearly a sick man.

  40. I wonder if Joe is as thrilled about Jessica’s rack in that picture as I am?


  41. BigJim


    Ass to Michael Jackson?
    Ass to Mister Rogers?
    Ass to Marriane Faithful?
    Ass to Muriel Hemingway?

  42. Richard

    Goddamn — that’s a body!

  43. I’d hit it.

    So would Joe. Too bad her little sis went from cute to plastic. She looks more fake than my penis does.

  44. ScottInFlorida

    Old man Simpson can stay as creepy as he wants as long as he keeps pictures like these delivered to my PC in my mom’s basement.

  45. Man she is real good looking,celebrities celebrities,

  46. guest1234567

    #6 says “I’m just waiting for The Simpson’s off-broadway show, The Aristocrats”

    This is just hillarious.

    Pinky nip, go here

  47. commissioner


    I have an appointment tomorrow.

    My daddy’s neglect is the reason why my music career never took off.

  48. jrzmommy

    Commish: Guess not everyone can be as lucky as the the Simpson Girls and the Jackson family with such loving dads…Maybe it’s just a Dad-Named-Joe thing?

  49. commissioner


    You’re right. My dad’s name wasn’t Joe.

    I guess the only way to truly get over the trauma is to become a truckstop lot lizard. That’ll be cheaper than therapy and I could make a few bucks.

    By the way, Chestica looks like she walked right out of a Sear’s catalog.

  50. cuesta_rey

    so THAT’S why we have seen so many pix of Ken Paves…Papa took the pix.

    There was some magazine at the doctor’s office…maybe People magazine. And there was this big cover story about Jessica’s new love—That guy singer who already broke it off. Anyway, there she was on the cover saying she was in love!

    Hmmmmmm. All part of Daddy’s publicity machine!

Leave A Comment