Jodie Foster was a guest speaker at Penn’s 250th Commencement and quoted Eminem’s “Lose Yourself” as the final message to the graduates. The only explanation I can come up with is she’s sick of winning Academy Awards and now wants to go for the coveted “Lamest Speech” award. In which case she’s won it. Hands down. Unanimous decision. Two thumbs up.
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IFuckingHateYou | May 22, 2006 at 8:49 am
Yo, you better lose yourself you stupid bitch.
Did she just get too stoned the night before to actually write a speech? Thank God for Sirius radio on the drive over to the commencement!
jujucabana | May 22, 2006 at 8:49 am
that was stupid. mostly of the university for asking her to show up.
guest1234567 | May 22, 2006 at 8:51 am
That’s a lot of empty seats. They should have sold beer, then nobody would have cared what she said anyway.
BarbadoSlim | May 22, 2006 at 8:54 am
I have it on good authority (vile rumors), that she hates the cock with a passion. She loves pink tacos though.
Gerald Tarrant | May 22, 2006 at 8:56 am
1) This story is old as hell.
2) Ted: “Use some song lyrics dude.” Bill: “Oh yeah.”
3) I think this was a scene for Nell 2.
Gerald Tarrant | May 22, 2006 at 9:00 am
4) I think a better title for this article should have been “Jodie Foster Embarrasses Humanity.”
BarbadoSlim | May 22, 2006 at 9:03 am
I thought this rabid bull-dyke was a graduate of some “Ivy League” school or somethin’. If that’s the best that elite universities can produce boy and girls, don’t waste your money.
leahdeadly | May 22, 2006 at 9:06 am
it could have been worse…she could have quoted from “private dancer”….
Natalie Portman is the next Jodi Foster.
leahdeadly | May 22, 2006 at 9:09 am
it could have been worse…she could have quoted from “private dancer”….
Natalie Portman is the next Jodi Foster.
DinerGirl | May 22, 2006 at 9:18 am
I would have preferred that she quoted a Billy Ocean song. Or Dokken. Much more meaningful for those about to enter the real world. Having Jodie Foster quote Eminem is like…. um…. I dunno, something related to Kathie Lee Gifford, but it’s too early in the morning to figure out what, exactly. Just stupid.
DinerGirl | May 22, 2006 at 9:20 am
Oh, and let me add — why the hell were there 2,000 empty seats in the stadium on the floor where the graduates were seated? Did people boycott the ceremony because they didn’t want to hear a wealthy white lesbian rap?
Jacq | May 22, 2006 at 10:07 am
Is she a lipstick lesbian?
#3 – Ahhh, Nell 2. Gone but not forgotten, that’s why I like you.
gas_up_the_hrududu | May 22, 2006 at 10:11 am
Jodi Foster is so hip, yo. F’shizzle.
BarbadoSlim | May 22, 2006 at 10:14 am
There’s nothing “lipstick” about Mr. Foster, ‘less you’re talking about his penis.
Dr.Rokter | May 22, 2006 at 10:15 am
“To quote the song, ‘Losing Yourself’ by the rap musical band Slim Shady…”
PocketRocket | May 22, 2006 at 10:18 am
WTF, Mr. Superficial? This story is over a week old.
Unlike Tom Cruise, Jodi does NOT love the cock!
Italian Stallion | May 22, 2006 at 10:34 am
Tom Cruise was singing Eminem just the other day…..
“I’m sorry Katie, I never meant to hurt you, I never meant to make you cry but tonight, I’m coming out the closet”……..
PapaHotNuts | May 22, 2006 at 10:46 am
Meryl Streep was recently quoted during a speech at Harvard
“Here’s a little somethin’ bout a nigga like me,
never shoulda been let out the penititary
Ice Cube would like ta say
That I’m a crazy mutha fucka from around the way
Since I was a youth, I smoked weed out
Now I’m the mutha fucka that ya read about
Takin’ a life or two
that’s what the hell I do, you don’t like how I’m livin
well fuck you!
This is a gang, and I’m in it
My man Dre’ll fuck you up in a minute
With a right left, right left you’re toothless
And then you say goddamn they ruthless!
Everwhere we go they say [damn!]
N W A’s fuckin’ up tha program
And then you realize we don’t care
We don’t just say no, we to busy sayin’ yeah!
to drinkin’ straight out the eight bottle
Do I look like a mutha fuckin role model?
To a kid lookin’ up ta me
Life ain’t nothin but bitches and money.
Cause I’m tha type o’ nigga that’s built ta last
If ya fuck wit me I’ll put a foot in ya ass
See I don’t give a fuck ’cause I keep bailin
Yo, what the fuck are they yellin
Chorus:
Gangsta, Gangsta! That’s what they’re yellin
“It’s not about a salary, it’s all about reality” – KRS One
Gangsta, Gangsta! That’s what they’re yellin
“Hopin you sophisticated motherfuckers hear what I have to say”
That Meryl Streep is one bad-ass bitch.
PocketRocket | May 22, 2006 at 10:53 am
Unlike Tom Cruise, Jodi does NOT love the cock!
Seriouslyppl! | May 22, 2006 at 10:55 am
UGH! When I saw this I had to stop it before I threw up!!
Equalparts | May 22, 2006 at 10:58 am
Oh wow. That was embarrassing. Oh my god.
xAgonyxScenex | May 22, 2006 at 10:58 am
That was almost hard to watch haha
TrannyGranny | May 22, 2006 at 11:04 am
Papa;
Allow me to be the first;
Shut The Fuck Up.
Charlaurz McHall | May 22, 2006 at 11:05 am
yeah this is terrible. watching it makes me cringe. you can see the video here, and some other funny stuff…http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com/celebrity_religion/2006/05/fostering_athei.html
oh, and check out this video, it is f***ing funny;
http://celebrityreligion.typepad.com/celebrity_religion/2006/05/10_things_i_hat.html
Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 22, 2006 at 11:06 am
D’oh! My intestines curled up inside me in embarrassment for her. Why did she think this was a good idea? I had to stop it before it was over, I couldn’t take it anymore.
pagebetty | May 22, 2006 at 11:13 am
=============
=============
SHE’S AN IDIOT. I heard the whole stupid speech the other day. She talks about how the public was glued to the burning buildings on 9/11. WHAT THE HELL? Oh yeah and the part about how the public was feeling exquisite pain and how beautiful it was! SHUT THIS BITCH UP! YOU FREAK!
BarbadoSlim | May 22, 2006 at 11:17 am
She should’ve ended by quoting the WU Tang Financial’s credo: “don’t forget to always diversify ya’ assets nigggas”
blueballs | May 22, 2006 at 11:55 am
typical liberal hollywood celebs far removed from reality. Clairse should go back to the underground prison cell to be the center of a prison circle jerk cuz that’s all she’s good for.
DinerGirl | May 22, 2006 at 12:07 pm
Ohmygod, PapaHotNuts, that was fantastic.
Grphdesi23 | May 22, 2006 at 12:12 pm
I always love it when white Hollywood liberals try their best to act “black”.
It shows they’ve come a long way in terms of race relations.
koh | May 22, 2006 at 12:15 pm
Hey blueballs, maybe you should pay more attention to this speech. Had your moronic ass actually attended a college graduation of your own you may have been able to spell CLARICE correctly. You sound like a real winner. Bet your parents are proud.
Pearly | May 22, 2006 at 12:18 pm
I love it that she picked these lyrics “do not miss your chance to blow” bahahahahha!
She is definetely gay, a Yalie and a complete idiot!
henrysgirl | May 22, 2006 at 12:24 pm
I mean if Jodie’s really gonna embarass herself, she really missed her chance. She should have gone for Vanilla Ice’s magical words instead of Eminem. Now that’s what I call a real whitey rapper. Go Ice Ice Baby.
Michael1 | May 22, 2006 at 12:24 pm
#21 and #23 This site is refreshingly free of the typical whine about “liberals”.
Yahoo must have axed the 258th account you created to spew twaddle about libtards on their message boards. You know, politicizing everything is an illness, and the only cure is a big dose of Tom Cruise’s baby batter.
prettierthanmeganharris | May 22, 2006 at 12:27 pm
John Hinckley Jr. is wondering what the fuck he was thinking.
Rondizzle | May 22, 2006 at 12:28 pm
I’m so sorry. I’m embarrassed for her!
Jacq | May 22, 2006 at 12:40 pm
#25 – It wouldn’t be that he shot the wrong man, would it? Isn’t he free again? Ahhh, second chances.
Jacq | May 22, 2006 at 12:42 pm
Maybe she lost herself in the music, the moment
BarbadoSlim | May 22, 2006 at 12:50 pm
#24 , so she’s a Yalie? that explains a lot, same clown school that brought us Mr. Nuculear.
herbiefrog | May 22, 2006 at 1:00 pm
f*c king great song
[thanks marshall]
as for jodie
she’s doin ok
just need to make wiser
choices about scripts
last thing
i
enjoyed was contact
now there was a book with a message
towards the end
not in the
film
at
a
l
l
but still fun
and a step along the way [thanks j]
PapaHotNuts | May 22, 2006 at 1:13 pm
@17 Tranny- that was uncalled for. I’m sorry I’m not as creative as you. You are the best and brightest. I’m confused why there aren’t awards for humor named after you. I only hope that with years of practice, I can be as witty as you. Unfortunately, I don’t have the energy to even begin to give a shit about what you think, so get fucked.
Pearly | May 22, 2006 at 1:16 pm
#28 yes she went to Yale when I lived in New Haven..she also dated a chick I used to know…
Nikki | May 22, 2006 at 1:20 pm
HAAAAAAAAAAAH
Feed_Me_Chocolate | May 22, 2006 at 1:22 pm
#29
You need to go back to moby.com. I saw you there.
BEAM | May 22, 2006 at 1:42 pm
Has Jodie Foster ever officially come out of the closet? Just curious.
TrannyGranny | May 22, 2006 at 3:16 pm
30 P-nuts
Apology accepted.
TrannyGranny | May 22, 2006 at 3:18 pm
Oh wait, that was supposed to be a comeback…damn. Do I have anything to say? Nope, my first comment stands alone.
LittleWatson | May 22, 2006 at 3:19 pm
I guess she figured that since she’s an Oscar winner, she’d better quote an Oscar winner. That was a really obvious attempt to gain street cred and she just failed miserably.
oshkoshb-goshdammgosh | May 22, 2006 at 3:32 pm
How is she acting black if Eminem is white?
And why didn’t she use a quote from “Flight Plan”? Like, “My daughter! Where is my daughter? I can’t find my daughter!”
That would be much more relevant.
Pearly | May 22, 2006 at 3:55 pm
Nope as far as I know she is closeted and adopting babies like every Hollywood robot. I think maybe she ought to have used some of Ems other lyrics like ” My words are like a dagger with a jagged edge that’ll stab you in the head whether you’re a fag or lez”
THAT would have been really appropriate.
AND if you ever lived around Yalies you would know most of them are rich, connected brats who make everyone in New Havens lives miserable and among them you may count..
Jennifer “is this fresh?” Beals, who came to the bakery I worked at when I was 16 every day and asked the same dumbass question every day..is it freeeeesh? It’s a bakery bitch!!!!
Tom Hanks
Clare (who cares) Danes
The chick who played Darlene on Roseanne who tuned out to be a sorority drunk
Just a few of the celebs CT was lucky enough to host for 4 years….