Joaquin Phoenix makes art until someone gets punched in the face

March 12th, 2009 // 58 Comments

Joaquin Phoenix continues to shatter our perception of reality by pretending to beat up a fan at his “concert” last night in Miami, according to the AP:

He began rapping to a beat played by the DJ and nodding to the music, although most of the lyrics were unintelligible. Then he responded to someone who appeared to be heckling him in the audience near the stage.
“We have a (double-expletive) in the audience,” he said before jumping into the crowd. It was not immediately clear whether the two men exchanged any blows.
“I saw the guy screaming at Joaquin, and Joaquin just came down,” said Jorge Lledo, 30, of Miami Beach.

Joaquin yells at the guy “I’ve got millions of dollars in my fucking bank account, what do you got?” which lets me know right away this is a farce. With a cleverly-masked by a “documentary” heroin addiction like Joaquin’s, he’s lucky if has five maybe 10 bucks. Or a suitcase full of Pop Tarts.

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Joaquin Phoenix
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Joaquin Phoenix
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Comments (58)

  1. Justin | March 12, 2009 at 10:02 am

    first

    Reply
  2. Alex | March 12, 2009 at 10:05 am

    You can Joaquin out of the ghetto, but you can’t take the hairlip…

    nevermind.

    Reply
  3. Bickus Dickus | March 12, 2009 at 10:09 am

    That whole Phoenix family is completely fucked up. That’s what happens when you allow hippy liberal nutjobs to raise kids and also name them. They deserve to wallow in their own misery. Fuck em all. I hope he dies from an overdose outside the Viper Room too.

    Reply
  4. It's Me Fuckers | March 12, 2009 at 10:09 am

    ROFL!! What a fucktard. At least I got to start my day with a laugh! =-)

    Reply
  5. havoc | March 12, 2009 at 10:12 am

    Andy Kaufman pulled this shit years ago, and it was stupid then too….

    .

    Reply
  6. 33rd Airborne | March 12, 2009 at 10:14 am

    What a douchebag. David Letterman should have kicked his ass too.

    Reply
  7. Virgodoll | March 12, 2009 at 10:15 am

    Wat’s wrong with him, he was such a fine actor

    Reply
  8. Richard McBeef | March 12, 2009 at 10:16 am

    Joaquin is so cool. I saw his profile and picture at http://www.smiletrain.org. I wonder what he is doing there?

    Reply
  9. Bobby Big Dog Malone | March 12, 2009 at 10:20 am

    Check out those tits in the blue shirt at the 0:48 second mark.

    Reply
  10. RichPort's Ghost | March 12, 2009 at 10:28 am

    More like a dickumentary.

    Reply
  11. I like big fat fucking titties | March 12, 2009 at 10:29 am

    good eye #9. props to you.

    Reply
  12. Deva | March 12, 2009 at 10:30 am

    What a douche.

    Reply
  13. Racer X | March 12, 2009 at 10:32 am

    FAIL.

    Reply
  14. douchebag hater | March 12, 2009 at 10:37 am

    I hope the guy he “beat up” takes Wackeems millions in a nice big lawsuit.

    Reply
  15. the editor | March 12, 2009 at 10:44 am

    Wow, that was easily the most poorly written post of 2009. Way to keep lowering the bar.

    Learn some fuckin’ English.

    Reply
  16. Charlie Caligula | March 12, 2009 at 10:53 am

    So fake. Kaufman would be ashamed.

    Reply
  17. slipl0c0 | March 12, 2009 at 10:55 am

    ITS HAPPENING..

    Reply
  18. M_Phelps | March 12, 2009 at 11:19 am

    Some B-lister making a fool of him/herself, and a thousand camera phones to post/blog with. For Miami, that’s some quality entertainment.

    Reply
  19. AndyisDEAD | March 12, 2009 at 11:20 am

    What a little pussy to start the fight and then yell for his security guards to “get him off me!” waahh………

    Reply
  20. Ally | March 12, 2009 at 11:22 am

    I love his songs, Well, he looks really cool and man taste, I am wondering if he has a profile on the millionair e c l u b—”R i c h S i n g l e . N e t “? I saw a man”jackhey00″ looks like him very much, he must attract a lot of girls there.

    Reply
  21. dooley | March 12, 2009 at 11:24 am

    I’m jealous – he’s got that many pop-tarts?

    Reply
  22. Mdiz | March 12, 2009 at 11:35 am

    Kaufman would love this shit! Nobody has ripped off Andy yet, so kudos to the bearded one for trying. (Poorly i might add) It’s nice to see someone at least trying. We have enough Brits, Paris…..(Insert useless meatsack here)

    Reply
  23. Jeff | March 12, 2009 at 11:46 am

    I love his new single, http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=f9-ac6qO94c
    It’s not really him but that’s just another layer on the joke of his life right now.

    Reply
  24. Evil O. | March 12, 2009 at 11:48 am

    Kaufman! Kaufman! I am so kewl because I know that Kaufman pulled this years ago. Do u kidz still sey 1337 cuz that’s what I am?!

    OK I’M going 2 wack of 2 pics of Hayden Panetenehair from my parentz basemint whil3 stufing my 500 pound a$$ w/Doritos & TAC0 bell

    Reply
  25. mai-tai | March 12, 2009 at 12:10 pm

    lmao at the faces of the people running as old man rivers dives into the pit.

    Reply
  26. Jrz | March 12, 2009 at 12:30 pm

    Jesus Christ….can’t he just go back to being Hot, Brooding, Seething-Good Looks Joaquin instead of Weirdo Joaquin?

    Reply
  27. Markus | March 12, 2009 at 12:43 pm

    He’s pathetic.

    Reply
  28. @23 | March 12, 2009 at 1:28 pm

    Great video! He is crazy as fuck!

    Reply
  29. Rat Boyd | March 12, 2009 at 1:32 pm

    It’s fairly safe to say that Joaquin Phoenix keeps it RAL. Does he think he’s Axl Rose here? http://www.ikeepsitral.com

    Reply
  30. Richard McBeef | March 12, 2009 at 1:44 pm

    @29 – your website is major gay. the only thing being kept RAL around there is a huge cock RAL deep in your ass.

    Reply
  31. Rough Daddy | March 12, 2009 at 2:31 pm

    This whole shtick he’s been doing is the best acting of his career so far…

    Reply
  32. slipl0c0 | March 12, 2009 at 2:40 pm

    @ 31 …

    aww come on .. signs was the shit ..

    no, seriously.

    it was shit.

    Reply
  33. Harry Crackpipe | March 12, 2009 at 2:46 pm

    Cheesy, very cheesy, and cheap, very very cheap. No talent on display, none at all.

    Clearly he’s creatively challenged. He needs somebody else to write and direct while he acts, that is if he ever gets to act again. He has no imagination whatsoever.

    This was just pathetic and stupid.

    Reply
  34. ctm | March 12, 2009 at 3:18 pm

    I was actually staring at chick in the blue dress the whole time. Nice tits!

    Reply
  35. RMC | March 12, 2009 at 3:45 pm

    haha man this guy is losing it…he’s already made it on http://www.ikeepsitral.com twice becuase he is losing it…

    Reply
  36. You Fucking Dolts | March 12, 2009 at 4:01 pm

    You Fucking Dolts – you know- you, who thinks this is real-

    You are precisely why the world is going to shit.

    Reply
  37. William | March 12, 2009 at 4:26 pm

    I’m not buying a minute of this “Joaquin Phoenix is a rapper” BS… Andy Kaufman is rolling in his grave.

    Reply
  38. Name (required): | March 12, 2009 at 4:47 pm

    mmmmmmmmm……pop tarts….

    Reply
  39. Name (required): | March 12, 2009 at 4:50 pm

    BTW….who edits a FUCKING YOUTUBE VIDEO.
    Oh yeah…the username is iheartheathermills….figures…must be a fellow stumpy that didn’t want to offend anyone….LAME

    Reply
  40. bop | March 12, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    L
    O
    L

    Reply
  41. bop | March 12, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    L
    O
    L

    Reply
  42. bop | March 12, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    L
    O
    L

    Reply
  43. bop | March 12, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    L
    O
    L

    Reply
  44. bop | March 12, 2009 at 5:19 pm

    L
    O
    L

    Reply
  45. SoTe | March 12, 2009 at 5:24 pm

    shit he seriously lost it… what a shame.

    Reply
  46. fel | March 12, 2009 at 7:17 pm

    Since he’s updated the Tony Clifton act, up next, he’ll have to start wrestling women and then start a fight with someone from WWE.

    One can only hope he will continue the Kaufman love, and develop lung cancer and die.

    Reply
  47. Rob | March 12, 2009 at 9:13 pm

    I actually like him a lot now. Good for him. If I were a famous actor, i’d be doing the same thing for no other reason just to amuse myself.

    Reply
  48. --Jack | March 12, 2009 at 9:15 pm

    Correction: “HAD a million dollars.” Within six months, that’ll be evenly split between the putz in the audience and some personal injury attorney.

    It’s like the hydrolytic cycle, but with money. From the poor to the rich, where it all condenses in a cloud and rains back down to the poor again. Sure am glad I paid attention in school. Now I just need to stand under a famous person and taunt my way to wealth!

    Reply
  49. cam | March 12, 2009 at 9:16 pm

    It’s not working.
    You’re not “edgy.”
    You’re not “underground.”
    Your’e not “laughing at us from behind the mask”
    This isn’t a grand experiment, and you don’t have the ability to pull off such a thing. Your buddy Affleck doesn’t have the skill either.
    We know you’re a joke.
    We know you pay actors and crowd members for reactions and photo ops.
    It’s not working.
    Your only entertainment value is that of an epic failure.

    Also,..there are many morons in the world who are rich (Paris Hilton) it’s not a good indicator of any “real” worth as a person.

    Reply
  50. cam | March 12, 2009 at 9:16 pm

    It’s not working.
    You’re not “edgy.”
    You’re not “underground.”
    Your’e not “laughing at us from behind the mask”
    This isn’t a grand experiment, and you don’t have the ability to pull off such a thing. Your buddy Affleck doesn’t have the skill either.
    We know you’re a joke.
    We know you pay actors and crowd members for reactions and photo ops.
    It’s not working.
    Your only entertainment value is that of an epic failure.

    Also,..there are many morons in the world who are rich (Paris Hilton) it’s not a good indicator of any “real” worth as a person.

    Reply

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