Back in 2009, Joanna Krupa complained about not having enough sex with her fiance and three years later she still hasn’t figured out she’s clearly engaged to a woman because she’s still not getting enough. A problem I’d be more than happy solve because, trust me, after one night with me, she’ll never want to do anything but watch reality TV and bitch about curtains. I’m like a housewife whisperer. Via Celebuzz:
“I feel deprived. I’m deprived of sex. I am,” Krupa confessed to Celebuzz Editor in Chief Dylan Howard.
“I don’t get it as much as I would like to . . . every day would be nice.”
Krupa, who has been engaged to Zago for five years, also credits some of her relationship troubles to her bi-costal life in Los Angeles and Miami.
“I think that’s also a big issue for him because obviously he would want us under one roof, but I’m a businesswoman. I can’t give up and sacrifice my career, my future for a man, especially being engaged for so many years. I’ve always been very independent, I take care of myself,” she said.
Of course, another solution is to just get married and then she’ll never want to have sex again, but basically committing suicide sounds pretty extreme, so why don’t we try all that stuff I talked about with me first? The whispering stuff. Clearly her fiance would want it this way seeing as he’s always so busy and “tired of her fat vagina that looks like her mother’s.” I’m just repeating what he said.