Joan Rivers: An Awesome Old Cunt Who Didn’t Give A Fuck (1933 – 2014)
Let’s pay some respects: Legendary comedian Joan Rivers died yesterday one week after going into cardiac arrest during surgery on her vocal chords. She was 81 years old and lived a fucking hell of a life. A life I’m now going to debase by citing her career as the groundwork for this site even though I wouldn’t call myself a comedian as much as some asshole on the Internet. That said, Joan had a special brand of not giving a fuck and wasn’t afraid to say anything for a joke without no regard for “PC bullshit.” A phrase I goddamn hate using because normally anyone using it is exactly one step away from saying, “Not to sound racist, but…” except with Joan you absolutely knew everything was 100% for the sake of a joke and not some deep-seeded bigotry. She was a constant zinger machine (and underrated prop comic) which gave her a reason to live through 800 surgeries. Unfortunately, she didn’t die the way she wanted, sitting on George Clooney’s face, but one time she did go on Howard Stern and ripped apart Chelsea Handler’s entire career. Which really isn’t anywhere close to George Clooney oral sexing a now-plastic vulva, but it seemed like a nice thing to say at the time.
Rest in Peace, Joan.