So Jimmy Fallon Might Have A Drinking Problem

“Oh, good, he told you rubbing him with a spatula sobers him up.”
“Riiiight. ‘Told me.'”

Back in June, Jimmy Fallon “mysteriously” injured his left hand (above) after tripping in his apartment, which resulted in an episode of The Tonight Show being cancelled while he had emergency surgery. In August, he chipped his tooth “trying to open his medication” for said injury, and now, here he is injuring his other hand on Saturday while carrying a bottle of Jäger:

Jimmy Fallin folks! #jimmyfallon #latenightwithjimmyfallon #harvard @jonthesneider and @johndoomsdayhoward

A video posted by cryan ryan (@cryan__ryan) on

But don’t worry, everything is “totally fine.” PEOPLE magazine says so:

A source tells PEOPLE that “everything is totally fine” and “It was all part of the celebration in the street and some random girl kneeled down in front of him abruptly as he was turning around and he tripped over her because he didn’t see her.”

In Jimmy Fallon’s defense, as far as drinking and parades went this weekend, this is practically Sesame Street. On top of that, I can’t even touch Jäger without turning into a vomit monster who’s shocked women don’t want to suck my puke-face, so I’m in no position to judge.

“HORF WARF WARF BLARG BLARG BLARG! *wipes face with sleeve*
Hey, you’re pretty, wanna touch mouths-
HORF WARF WARF BLARG BLARG BLARG! *stares at ground for way, way too long*
How about now?”

- Casanova, if Casanova was a BAWSE

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