The Duggars Are Using Birth Control To Stay On TV, I’m Telling Jesus!

The first rule of Duggar Club is: you do not fuck without making a baby. The second rule of Duggar Club is: you DO NOT fuck without making a baby! So guess what Jill and Jessa Duggar are doing? Fucking without making a baby. And, no, not each other. These people aren’t that awesome. Via Raw Story:

A few weeks ago, the show closed out its first season, but not before teasing that the next time the ladies get pregnant they plan to be pregnancy buddies, which is causing many to ask questions. Christian Daily reports there is new speculation that these pregnancies are being coordinated to keep TLC interested in the show.

Their show was slated to be canceled before they even finished the first season, Hollywood Gossip reports. That makes these new coy comments about a dual pregnancy seem calculating.

While all of this sounds like rampant speculation to generate web clicks, sweet, sweet, web clicks, in the above photo, Jessa’s unfortunately named son Spurgeon is four months old, and yet she’s clearly not five months pregnant per the tenets of her child-farting cult. So somebody danced with Black Phillip in the woods. Who was it? What did that goat bastard promise you? Delicious butters? The finest of ginghams? ANSWER ME, WITCH.

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