Jessica Simpson’s Diet of Vengeance

July 29th, 2009 // 47 Comments

Since getting curbed by Tony Romo on her 29th birthday, Jessica Simpson has decided to seek revenge by getting her ass back in shape because apparently it was Tony who kept shoving her full of Ben & Jerry’s. Yeah, TonyOK! Magazine reports:

“Right after Tony ended things, Jessica said, ‘I want my old body back,’” a friend of the singer reveals in the new issue of OK!. “She went into her kitchen, got a trash bag and started to clear it out.”
And getting rid of the bad food isn’t the only way she’s slimming down. Jessica has been spotted several times in the last two weeks heading to celeb trainer Harley Pasternak’s West Hollywood fitness center.
“Jess is serious about getting her body back into fighting shape,” her pal reveals to OK!. “Working out is helping to give her focus and clear her head. It’s better than sitting around moping or throwing pity parties with ice cream sundaes.”

“She went into her kitchen, got a trash bag and started to clear it out.” And by trash bag, she of course means Jessica’s dad drove an entire garbage truck through the wall. Because there’s nothing Joe Simpson hates more than fatties. Except for prudes. “But it’s Daddy’s birthday, sweetheart…”


  1. havoc

    As long as she doesn’t try Madonna’s arm routine….


  2. taz

    id pump her silly

  3. StEvec

    Good for her….Romo’s a loser and will regret dumping her.

  4. peterman

    fighting shape!

  5. Joe Simpson

    i love her tits!

  6. spice boy

    she is my dream girl

  7. Harold^Sick

    Good for her for doing something positive for herself. She’s still hot in my book.

  8. Sandy

    “I love my curvy body!”

    That was just a little while ago. I guess that love affair ended too, huh? Wasn’t it supposed to be about liberation from the too-skinny male ideal for women’s bodies? No, wait, let me guess – now she’s “empowering” herself by “taking back” her body.

    She just needs to pay for a hit on her dad. She has big tits and loves anal, and that’s more than enough for most guys even with all the inane chatter coming out of her mouth. But dad’s got to go.

  9. Stand up for men

    Hey ladies, shouldn’t “liberation” get rid of this behavior of yours. Slim down to get a man, then say fuck it once you get him and blimp up. Then sob-”I’m the same person I was when you met me.” Except now you’re two people.
    The first 200# she needs to lose is Joe.

  10. D4P

    It’s amazing to me that, week after week, people will pay money to read about how some “celebrity” got fat and then got skinny, or vice versa.

    It’s not rocket science, people. Your weight depends almost exclusively upon diet and exercise. If you eat poorly and don’t exercise, you get fat. If you eat well and exercise, you get in shape.

    Stop making rich people richer by paying to read this crap.

  11. stupidass

    she’s in training for her 2nd tryout for the dallas cowboys. she tried out last year, position: goalpost….but was found just too damn dumb.

  12. Losing ten pounds of fat in ten days is impossible except for extremely obese people (like over 400 pounds).

    At her size, to lose that much fat that fast would involve subsisting on a 1500 calorie a day diet (the minimum to avoid starvation mode) and then engaging in about 90 minutes of intense weight training plus running a half marathon every single day. In other words, it’s impossible.

    If she really did lose that much weight, then most of it was water.

    What she really needs to do is lose 200 pounds of Joe Simpson. That dude is creepy.

  13. Randal

    Jessica Honey, you are always beautiful no matter what the scale may read. It cannot tell you “Jessy, the needle might bank to the right but you are still lovely”. Don’t let love frighten you away from loving and for God’s sake dear, make sure your pussy doesn’t stink!


  14. Tony


  15. devilsrain

    Wow gee whiz you mean with a trainer and diet you can lose fat ? Fuck me what was I thinking

  16. Attention chicks who get fat:

    Hey ladies, listen up. if you would work out and stay fit WHILE you were with a man and didn’t wait for them to get sick of your fat ass lying around, then you wouldn’t have to find a new boyfriend all the time. stay in shape while you have a boyfriend and make him happy.

  17. Hooray for Boobies

    I hope she does not lose her boobs

  18. Anonymous

    Awww……let’s all feel sorry for poor Jessica……..

    What a fucking joke.

  19. me

    she is pefect.

  20. ling

    so basically she’s going to get back in shape to snag some other douchebag who will dump her like homo did when she inevitably let’s herself go again?

    what a moron. she should focus on being healthy and fit for herself, not for some loser, and i dont know, maybe do something with her career….?

  21. pam

    That photo of her running is from a movie she made 3 years ago. The picture of her in the black dress is old too. OKI! just makes stuff up. She’s getting ready to shoot a new TV show. Of course she’s going to work out. Don’t really care for Jessica, but can’t stand journalistic posers either.

  22. I'm not romo

    I not only would, I WANT TO

  23. Rancid

    “She went into her kitchen, got a trash bag and started to clear it out.”

    And three AM that morning, she was outside digging through the trash can, stuffing her face, and crying hysterically.

  24. Kelley

    Who cares … her legs will always look like giant hams … who cares about her weight. And I disagree with people who say Tony Romo is a loser. Jessica can’t sing, but he can play football. She’s a zero-talent who’s had too much nose surgery.

  25. lola

    It is very possible to lose 10 pounds in a week. I lost ten pounds and gained tons of muscle from my first week of wrestling practice (3 hours a day of intense workout). I released so many endorphins from the exercise that I lost interest in food and only ate when I was HUNGRY. I was maybe 135 lbs at the time so I was not obese either.

  26. She’s washed up.

  27. Xan

    #17: … or do what I did; make your trainer your boyfriend! Extra benefits~

  28. jim

    “Working out is helping to give her focus and clear her head.”

    “Clear her head” That’s funny.

  29. jim

    “Working out is helping to give her focus and clear her head.”

    “Clear her head” That’s funny.

  30. Sam

    She is such a dumbass…Men only want to screw her. No man want a serious relationship with her. She was texting douche bag John Mayer and he don’t want any daylight time with this shithead.
    She is working out so she can try to snag some other high profile douche bag because she don’t feel good about herself. That’s why she let Mayer text her while she was with Tony. So glad Tony dumped her.

  31. ChrisNY

    By far, her biggest problem is her father, who discussed her breasts in a national magazine, like a high schooler talking about Pam Anderson. It was stomach-turning.

    And if that’s not the most f*cked up thing possible, consider the fact that he interferes in every relationship she has, until the guy eventually runs screaming, at which point daddy is again the most important man in her life. Jessica is never going to have a normal life until she puts some distance between herself and that freakishly controlling, painfully creepy man. I’m sorry her relationship didn’t work out but I can’t blame Tony Romo for getting away from that.

  32. Sicko

    Poor Jessica

    I’d bend her over and fuck her ass SSSOO hard she’d go right through the wall

  33. pig

    I wouldn’t mind screwing her and spending her money. I’d just wear earplugs and nod my head alot

  34. Kia

    That cover shot doesn’t look anything like Jessica Simpson. While I appreciate tabloids as much as the next crazy jackass, they could TRY to find someone who looks a bit more like her if they’re going to run a fake story.

  35. Piece of Cake

    No big deal, I once lost 40 lbs in one day, and all I had to do was have a baby.

  36. yeah, I know how to lose 10 pounds in 10 days too, its called an 8ball your crack whore

  37. 10 lbs in 10 days is dangerous, isn’t it? Unless your super morbidly obese.





  39. betth

    She needs to get pregnant to keep a man! –

  40. Galtacticus

    If she could count higher than 10 then she would have lost even more weight!

  41. Galtacticus

    The reason is that she has only ten fingers.

  42. ALBlonde

    Jessica doesn’t look good very thin. Her bone structure isn’t built for it, she’s supposed to be curvy, and is gorgeous curvy. And whoever said she has big legs, shes got muscular legs, and she’s short, so they arent going to be sticks. But who on earth wants stick legs? Thats freaking disgusting. Jessica didn’t need to lose weight, she needed to lose her dad and quit being so clingy, those two things were driving Tony, and all of her ex’s NUTS. Her dad is completely psycho and regardless of Jessica’s weight or body he will always drive her boyfriends away!!!!

  43. DAVID

    Sandy and kelly you’re jealous otherwise you wouldn’t waste you’re time on this site . sandy get a life. maybe sandy should write for porn she knows so much about it.

  44. I think she should just be let be to be honest. Good on her if she wants to eat healthy and do a bit of exercise, just as long as it doesn’t turn into anything else and she ends up a size 0.

    slimming tips

  45. In the wake of getting dumped hard by Tony Romo on the eve of her 29th birthday, Jessica Simpson has decided on the way to get the sweetest revenge. Or OK! Magazine has at least decided on it for her so it can sell magazines. Either way, Jessica Simpson is looking to sweat it out at the gym. Yay! “Right after Tony ended things, Jessica Simpson said, ‘I want my old body back,’” a friend of the singer reveals in the new issue of the celeb news tabloid.

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