Jessica Simpson’s breasts aren’t big enough

January 14th, 2010 // 122 Comments

Because there’s no way anything from Victoria’s Secret will hold those things up, Wonder Woman is gonna be pissed when she sees these pics. “Borrow my clothes without asking, will ya? I want Tony Romo naked in the Invisible Jet in one hour. We’re parking this bitch on her lawn.”

Photos: Flynet
superficial

  1. first

    first!

  2. third what the hell is this.

  3. Woah

    She appears slightly uncomfortable with the visible blue veins.

  4. josh

    Boobs.

  5. pimp

    i would eat her ass all day, because i care…

  6. oh my god

    I NEED THEM IN MY MOUTH.

  7. havoc

    Heck yeah! Blue and veiny….

    .

  8. Vinnie the Chin

    Yamma Hamma Mamma.

  9. Pseudopodia

    Lovin the veinage

  10. Randal

    Even the stars in the night sky don’t shine as bright as you do, Jessica. Your beautiful features are very welcomed in a decade of plastic surgery and when natural is the next big thing, you won’t have to change anything.

    Randal

  11. Deacon Jones

    Ok, who shoved an air hose up her ass?! Jess is going thru some tough….food?

    But in all seriousness, I used to pray on these girls in college as follows:

    1. Super hot, but packs on the “the freshmen 15″ (sometimes freshmen 30)

    2. Already delicate self esteem accelerates into drastic downward spiral

    3. Goes to party, still trying to look slutty in her undersized clothes

    4. 7 beers and a couple hours later she’s letting you do ass-to-mouth with
    NO HESITATION WHATSOEVER

    5. Next morning as she tries to squeeze into her jeans from 2 years ago asks “So you promise you’ll call” with a half smile/ half burst into tears look on her face.

    6. Guy looks at her, farts, manages a “Yeah”, rolls over and sleeps till the 1 pm football games are on.

  12. gotmilk?

    what the fuck is this? that entire outfit is just absurd, and the veins are not helping!

  13. pimp

    @12 Deacon Jones…spoken like a true All Pro.

  14. Jen

    holy shit, those are some big titties!

  15. Deacon Jones

    @ Pimp

    (Bows)

  16. anon

    She and her breast are hot.

  17. oJAEflo

    If there is a God, some day she is going to let these girls out for some serious fresh air for all the world to see.
    Not fair that Papa Joe is the only one who gets to see these beauties.

  18. salsa

    I’d hit that too!!!

  19. Gatorbates

    I’d last 2 seconds … wait …. shhiiiiittt.

  20. sam

    18, and they’ll be dragging on the ground behind her.

  21. roxy

    Are her boobs real?

  22. sandra

    What in the hell is she wearing?

    She looks overstuffed…uncomfortable.

  23. Armando

    All that gloriously beautiful country girl needs is a weekend of all-American fucking. Damn it hurts that talent like her’s (by talent I mean body) goes to waste with those gay boys in Hollywood. Romo your a pussy. Well anyway Jessie, if you need to get straightened out I’m available.

  24. Armando

    All that gloriously beautiful country girl needs is a weekend of all-American fucking. Damn it hurts that talent like her’s (by talent I mean body) goes to waste with those gay boys in Hollywood. Romo your a pussy. Well anyway Jessie, if you need to get straightened out I’m available.

  25. YWFN

    She is without question one of the hottest broads on the planet. Top 3.

  26. No GayTards

    She is SOOOOO built for comfort. I would be all over those Bodacious Bahama Mamas!!!

  27. Taylor

    But seriously, I love the LV bag, not big enough for her to hide behind, but cute purse!!

  28. Taz

    Those are some great tits! Is that wrong?

    Signed,
    Joe Simpson

  29. e-rock

    @ Randal,

    Those puppies are implants, sorry. Nose job, and lip injections too. She originally had big boobs, but they were seriously smaller and saggy, so she got implants. So sorry, but NOT natural. And dumb as a rock to boot.

  30. Amy

    Wow! They are really huge! Definitely implants!

  31. OMG i would play with those all freaking night..!!!

  32. Don

    I want to motorboat those SOOOOO FUCKING BAD.

  33. class clown

    dolly parton transformation 66% complete

  34. ___

    Thick tits, thick theighs, thick calves, thick ass and a thick neck to boot. She needs to cut the calorie intake in half. Immediately.

  35. I have FF cup fake boobs and her boobs are definitely fake, shes a great advertisement for fake boobs though. Though If you are thinking of copyiong her look I would recommend getting ass implants as well to balance out the proprotions. I’ve got them and you cant go wrong.

    Good on you Jess plastic is the way to go,

    I know all the jealous natural girls will probably hate on you, just like they hate on me when I steal their guys attentions, natural girls are on the way out and silicone is the future

  36. watt lumber

    Is this Dog The Bounty Hunter’s wife?

  37. guinness

    I think I see Billy Corgan hiding in her bra.

  38. Is #37 Heidi Montag? Fake will never be better than ATTRACTIVE natural. End of story. I’m hoping that entire post was sarcasm and I’m just slow at catching on…lol

  39. who dat

    Jess has a rockin body. A little weight off her bottom and EVERYONE would be jerkin off to her. She has no talent except anal though. Once she loses the weight, put tape over her mouth so you wouldn’t have to listen to her and she is the perfect woman.

    And btw- her breasts are natural. Fake breasts don’t show veins like those. Those are certified corn fed titty fuckin breasts.

  40. Hugh Gentry

    she could tuck her old boobs in her socks.

  41. Mario Van Peeples

    @ Randal,

    Those puppies are implants, sorry. Nose job, and lip injections too. She originally had big boobs, but they were seriously smaller and saggy, so she got implants. So sorry, but NOT natural. And dumb as a rock to boot.

    Wow, thanks for schooling us common folk on the intricate details of plastic surgery…too bad you’re mistaken. thanks for playing. Fuck off.

  42. jordan

    she is sexy and needs my big c.o.c.k and a nice t.i.t.t.y. f.u.c.k

  43. jordan

    she is sexy and needs my big c.o.c.k and a nice t.i.t.t.y. f.u.c.k

  44. jordan

    she is sexy and needs my big c.o.c.k and a nice t.i.t.t.y. f.u.c.k

  45. welcome to:

    http://www.maidi2008.net
    ——-
    50%off ca,ed hardy t-shirt$15 jeans,coach handbag$33,air max90,dunk,polo

    t-shirt$13,,lacoste t-shirt $13 air jordan for sale,l nba jersy for sale

    sale,$35,nfl nba jersy for sale

    and so on..

    if you like to order anything you like.

    More details, please just browse our website

    Quality is our Dignity; Service is our Lift.

    enjoy yourself. thank you!!

  46. dodie

    her natural boobs were kinda big, but they were longer & saggy, so you fantasy driven guys can like em all you want, but stop pretending they’re real. also, wear any size dress you want, Jess, but your jacket-all outerwear, actually- needs to be big enough to zip, o.k.?

  47. no i’m not heidi montag, i just share the first name but she is an inspiration to all girls, i love her, shes so cool

    and the post is serious, maybe you just didn’t understand, me and all my friends are super hot plastic girls and everyone either loves us or is jealous of us

Leave A Comment